Despite still being short of sleep when I woke
At lunchtime left the office, headed out
To the other side of town, a long walk
Had a hilarious tiime having haircut
They know I'm a comedian, dominate
The attention of all three staff these days
Then after work, shopping for things to eat
And once home I did my exercises
Just about managed press-ups, what a feat
Javi was out, so I stayed on my feet
In the living room, played guitar, and broke
The record, I think, for skill, trying not
To look at the strings, with fingers of smoke
I played Sparks melodies. Poem rewrote
Monday 24 August 2015
Sunday 23 August 2015
3293 - Sisters of noisy
Nice day in in Wilmslow and Manchester with
Josie and (in town) with Pearl. Koffee Pot
Was our first stop. A late breakfast. It pissed
It down while in there, but with lots and lots
Of toast to munch, was occupied and watched
The heavy rain in Manchester, second
Day in a row, flowers on tarmac plots
As heavy drops land and spread all around
Momentary petals as they rebound
From impact. Then to Ziferblat we switched
For drinks and cakes galore, also somewhat
Unexpectedly, Monopoly bound
Our attention for two hours. Hug and kiss
For both sisters, time with them is well-bought
Josie and (in town) with Pearl. Koffee Pot
Was our first stop. A late breakfast. It pissed
It down while in there, but with lots and lots
Of toast to munch, was occupied and watched
The heavy rain in Manchester, second
Day in a row, flowers on tarmac plots
As heavy drops land and spread all around
Momentary petals as they rebound
From impact. Then to Ziferblat we switched
For drinks and cakes galore, also somewhat
Unexpectedly, Monopoly bound
Our attention for two hours. Hug and kiss
For both sisters, time with them is well-bought
3292 - Absolute professionals
Just got home from the Absolute Bowie
Gig at the Ruby Lounge, it was good stuff
Though many guitar solos deafened me
I was right by the speaker, made me deaf
The first part of the set were highlights of
The Ziggy Stardust songs, the middle was
The mid-70s funky pop, enough
People were dancing, Golden Years
And though less funky, also Life on Mars
The third part was the least interesting to me
But still good in parts, though of course the guff
Of Let's Dance had to be played, yes of course!
Tired myself earlier writing poetry
And finished Fifty Shades, no that's no bluff!
Sat 22 Aug
Gig at the Ruby Lounge, it was good stuff
Though many guitar solos deafened me
I was right by the speaker, made me deaf
The first part of the set were highlights of
The Ziggy Stardust songs, the middle was
The mid-70s funky pop, enough
People were dancing, Golden Years
And though less funky, also Life on Mars
The third part was the least interesting to me
But still good in parts, though of course the guff
Of Let's Dance had to be played, yes of course!
Tired myself earlier writing poetry
And finished Fifty Shades, no that's no bluff!
Sat 22 Aug
Friday 21 August 2015
3291 - Getting on with it
Wow, what a day, and also a great play
On guitar once back home, and now staying
In tonight, after three nights' comedy
But that's OK, because I am looking
Forward to the Bowie tribute act in
The Ruby Lounge tomorrow night, and I'll
Write a poem first, fit for publishing
In the next 'Evidently' - it's a while
Since so much has been right, there's many miles
To freedom, as the man said, and now hey
It's all getting rather good, I'm hoping
By continued focus, that these things will
Continue to get better still, and they
Will, if I go on doing what I'm doing
On guitar once back home, and now staying
In tonight, after three nights' comedy
But that's OK, because I am looking
Forward to the Bowie tribute act in
The Ruby Lounge tomorrow night, and I'll
Write a poem first, fit for publishing
In the next 'Evidently' - it's a while
Since so much has been right, there's many miles
To freedom, as the man said, and now hey
It's all getting rather good, I'm hoping
By continued focus, that these things will
Continue to get better still, and they
Will, if I go on doing what I'm doing
Thursday 20 August 2015
3290 - Smokey losers
Second night at Tiger Lounge, with mine host
Tuesday Tony, but this time I went on
And did the Egyptian jokes that were lost
To the world from Tuesday's cancellation
Of The Worst Comedy Night, where I've long
Performed to great acclaim, but now I've dipped
My toes in other waters, ok, none
Of the paying public, no money slipped
From purses or wallets, but these guys trip
The light puntastic, are better than hosts
Of dull-witted or supine audience, fun
Though they may have, I'd like to see them flipped
Onto the stage to see them turn to toast
Big up for amateur comedy turns!!
Tuesday Tony, but this time I went on
And did the Egyptian jokes that were lost
To the world from Tuesday's cancellation
Of The Worst Comedy Night, where I've long
Performed to great acclaim, but now I've dipped
My toes in other waters, ok, none
Of the paying public, no money slipped
From purses or wallets, but these guys trip
The light puntastic, are better than hosts
Of dull-witted or supine audience, fun
Though they may have, I'd like to see them flipped
Onto the stage to see them turn to toast
Big up for amateur comedy turns!!
Wednesday 19 August 2015
3289 - Snigger Lounge
Amazingly, despite last night's late night
And a busy day at work following
I went out tonight to comedy night
At Tiger Lounge, 'bout which I been hearing
And enjoyed the acts, sitting there watching
A Guinness then two cheap ciders I drank
Met a few new people, reacquainting
Myself with Tuesday Tony, and to think
Some of these guys were good, no, no-one stank
So not much time but tomorrow I might
Have to up my game to be impressing
What will I do, will look at the jokes bank
And look at the material from last night
I didn't do, and do quick rehearsing!
And a busy day at work following
I went out tonight to comedy night
At Tiger Lounge, 'bout which I been hearing
And enjoyed the acts, sitting there watching
A Guinness then two cheap ciders I drank
Met a few new people, reacquainting
Myself with Tuesday Tony, and to think
Some of these guys were good, no, no-one stank
So not much time but tomorrow I might
Have to up my game to be impressing
What will I do, will look at the jokes bank
And look at the material from last night
I didn't do, and do quick rehearsing!
3288 - Comedy of nevers
Only three hours' sleep, got up before six
Started thinking of comedy routine
I was due to perform (about Egypt)
But when I got there, there was no-one in
And so the comedy didn't happen
So instead had some drinks, Dermot was there
Javi went too, and Jackie O'Hagan
Caught the end of the match. United were
Lucky to beat Bruges 3-1, was the hair
Of Fellaini that did it, hair that fixed
The result in the Reds' favour. We'd been
In the Salford Arms, then Mulligans where
We had another, met these guys, told jokes
A guy played spoons, home beer before bedtime!
Tue 18 August
Started thinking of comedy routine
I was due to perform (about Egypt)
But when I got there, there was no-one in
And so the comedy didn't happen
So instead had some drinks, Dermot was there
Javi went too, and Jackie O'Hagan
Caught the end of the match. United were
Lucky to beat Bruges 3-1, was the hair
Of Fellaini that did it, hair that fixed
The result in the Reds' favour. We'd been
In the Salford Arms, then Mulligans where
We had another, met these guys, told jokes
A guy played spoons, home beer before bedtime!
Tue 18 August
Monday 17 August 2015
3287 - Rubies and diamond dogs
Didn't get the FFS tickets, for
Fuck's sake, but never mind, ambiguous
About it anyway. I'm looking for-
ward to Absolute Bowie, taking place
Saturday night. No drive-in, I confess
Nor is the Ruby Lounge gig on Tuesday
But we'll find out, is there life on dancefloors?
Not only in Warszawa, but UK
There'll be both sound and vision, and so may
Boys keep swinging, let's dance, Queen Bitch, you whore
From station to station, we'll be heroes
Be my wife, Jean Genie, no I won't say
Even Andy Warhol he was a bore
But in our rooms we won't be breaking glass
Fuck's sake, but never mind, ambiguous
About it anyway. I'm looking for-
ward to Absolute Bowie, taking place
Saturday night. No drive-in, I confess
Nor is the Ruby Lounge gig on Tuesday
But we'll find out, is there life on dancefloors?
Not only in Warszawa, but UK
There'll be both sound and vision, and so may
Boys keep swinging, let's dance, Queen Bitch, you whore
From station to station, we'll be heroes
Be my wife, Jean Genie, no I won't say
Even Andy Warhol he was a bore
But in our rooms we won't be breaking glass
Sunday 16 August 2015
3286 - Oh FFS
Need to get tickets if any are left
For the FFS gig, I'd like to see
Sparks and Franz Ferdinand combined. A deft
Talker, Louise, who I met Saturday
Is going, and although it's patently
Not as good as seeing a Sparks gig, I
Might enjoy this nonetheless, and I'll see
The Mael brothers again. Three years gone by
Since I saw them live, and it was a high
And Saturday, something I don't do oft
Watch a 'tribute' band - Absolute Bowie
Sounds potentially fun, fake oddity
Not done much today, just watched films and stuffed
My face! Well yesterday was mainly beer!
For the FFS gig, I'd like to see
Sparks and Franz Ferdinand combined. A deft
Talker, Louise, who I met Saturday
Is going, and although it's patently
Not as good as seeing a Sparks gig, I
Might enjoy this nonetheless, and I'll see
The Mael brothers again. Three years gone by
Since I saw them live, and it was a high
And Saturday, something I don't do oft
Watch a 'tribute' band - Absolute Bowie
Sounds potentially fun, fake oddity
Not done much today, just watched films and stuffed
My face! Well yesterday was mainly beer!
Saturday 15 August 2015
3285 -Beer googles
I've been out in Glossop, it was good fun
And now I'm back watching Match of the Day
Pint after pint, and laughs with some women
The sun came out and it became wa-hay
Breasts were on show, it was worth it, I'd say
Now I'm back home, Newcastle struggling
How come Maclaren's their coach, was Derby
But we sacked him cos he lost it, moving
To the Magpies, now Swansea are beating
Them. Beer rules all, it's all one, it's all one
Stood in the beer garden nonsense held sway
Although some woman was really interesting
In her leather jacket, it's good to learn
From her, and I did, now back home, wa-hay
And now I'm back watching Match of the Day
Pint after pint, and laughs with some women
The sun came out and it became wa-hay
Breasts were on show, it was worth it, I'd say
Now I'm back home, Newcastle struggling
How come Maclaren's their coach, was Derby
But we sacked him cos he lost it, moving
To the Magpies, now Swansea are beating
Them. Beer rules all, it's all one, it's all one
Stood in the beer garden nonsense held sway
Although some woman was really interesting
In her leather jacket, it's good to learn
From her, and I did, now back home, wa-hay
Friday 14 August 2015
3284 - Taking a raincheck
What a wet day, the rain's gone on and on!
So much so that there's now a giant hole
In the Mancunian Way, please don't fall in!
The rain's enough to make of us a mole
Burying ourselves deep down like lumps of coal
It's eased off now, and the weather forecast
For the weekend's OK, so I will roll
Up at Piccadilly station, half-past
Twelve tomorrow, with a big group, a taste
Of beer and the Glossop folk train to come!
Should be fun, while Jo's in Spain and I'm all
At a loss for what to do these two Sats
Last week, Huddersfield, this week, Glossop. Fun
And beer are intertwined, be still, my soul!
So much so that there's now a giant hole
In the Mancunian Way, please don't fall in!
The rain's enough to make of us a mole
Burying ourselves deep down like lumps of coal
It's eased off now, and the weather forecast
For the weekend's OK, so I will roll
Up at Piccadilly station, half-past
Twelve tomorrow, with a big group, a taste
Of beer and the Glossop folk train to come!
Should be fun, while Jo's in Spain and I'm all
At a loss for what to do these two Sats
Last week, Huddersfield, this week, Glossop. Fun
And beer are intertwined, be still, my soul!
Thursday 13 August 2015
3283 - New men in town
Derby have had a woeful beginning
To the season with new coach Paul Clement
Last night we lost to Portsmouth, the Carling
Cup, first round, mid-August, yes, we were sent
Packing with ease, the Rams a team that's meant
To be promotion favourites, Portsmouth bossed
The game. apparently, thank God didn't
Watch it down the pub, all alone and lost
In the Salford Arms TV room. We're toast!
Meanwhile, the Labour leadership's coming
To a head, three would-be leaders hell-bent
On trashing Jeremy Corbyn, the most
Persuasive of the four, too left-leaning
For a Labour man. Shocking! Jez - repent!
To the season with new coach Paul Clement
Last night we lost to Portsmouth, the Carling
Cup, first round, mid-August, yes, we were sent
Packing with ease, the Rams a team that's meant
To be promotion favourites, Portsmouth bossed
The game. apparently, thank God didn't
Watch it down the pub, all alone and lost
In the Salford Arms TV room. We're toast!
Meanwhile, the Labour leadership's coming
To a head, three would-be leaders hell-bent
On trashing Jeremy Corbyn, the most
Persuasive of the four, too left-leaning
For a Labour man. Shocking! Jez - repent!
Wednesday 12 August 2015
3282 - Pyramid theme
Had thought maybe I'd go and watch Derby
Play in the Carling Cup, but think I'll stay
In instead, on the radio there'll be
Updates at least, and maybe I can pay
Attention to writing comedy. They
Have asked for a theme that doesn't inspire -
Egypt or belly dancing - I won't say
I'll ignore the theme, cos I am a tryer
But Ancient Egypt, I am not a buyer
I could do an anecdote 'bout belly
Dancing - remember Istanbul? - but hey
Not sure if anecdotes are my desire
At least of alcohol and fags I'm free
Til I go to Glossop this Saturday
Play in the Carling Cup, but think I'll stay
In instead, on the radio there'll be
Updates at least, and maybe I can pay
Attention to writing comedy. They
Have asked for a theme that doesn't inspire -
Egypt or belly dancing - I won't say
I'll ignore the theme, cos I am a tryer
But Ancient Egypt, I am not a buyer
I could do an anecdote 'bout belly
Dancing - remember Istanbul? - but hey
Not sure if anecdotes are my desire
At least of alcohol and fags I'm free
Til I go to Glossop this Saturday
Tuesday 11 August 2015
3281 - Strum and dusted
Looking forward to a guitar session
Tonight, had a good 'un last night playing
Beach Boys, and there's more of the same to come
It really pays dividends, practising
Well not literally but know my meaning
Can routinely play now quite well without
Feeling a need to slow down by looking
We don't look when we walk, don't think about
It, talk casually, look around, chill out
As we stroll almost mindlessly along
That's what I want when I'm stood there strumming
No effort required, very little thought
And won't be satisfied til I am one
Of that ilk, able to chat, joke or sing
Tonight, had a good 'un last night playing
Beach Boys, and there's more of the same to come
It really pays dividends, practising
Well not literally but know my meaning
Can routinely play now quite well without
Feeling a need to slow down by looking
We don't look when we walk, don't think about
It, talk casually, look around, chill out
As we stroll almost mindlessly along
That's what I want when I'm stood there strumming
No effort required, very little thought
And won't be satisfied til I am one
Of that ilk, able to chat, joke or sing
Monday 10 August 2015
3280 - City dwellers, successful fellas
Not much to report today, except for
The changing British weather, now sunny
And warm, now raining, wonder what's in store
From one moment to next, can't wait to see
The front door's fixed, I got a brand new key
Got to do a copy for the lodger
Tomorrow a duplicate for Javi
Just remembered, tonight it's Manchester
City's first game, against West Brom, it's the
First chance to make a statement, Blues could soar
To top of table tonight, seem to be
Contenders for the title. And they were
Pleased no doubt at Chelsea's stumble, a poor
Draw at home to unfancied team, Swansea
The changing British weather, now sunny
And warm, now raining, wonder what's in store
From one moment to next, can't wait to see
The front door's fixed, I got a brand new key
Got to do a copy for the lodger
Tomorrow a duplicate for Javi
Just remembered, tonight it's Manchester
City's first game, against West Brom, it's the
First chance to make a statement, Blues could soar
To top of table tonight, seem to be
Contenders for the title. And they were
Pleased no doubt at Chelsea's stumble, a poor
Draw at home to unfancied team, Swansea
Sunday 9 August 2015
3279 - Costa del Stockport
A nice trip out to Stockport with Josie
She wanted white trainers, Nike brand, so we
Looked for them in the mall, and in JD
Sports we found some that fit, fairly quickly
And she put them on instead of her D
Ms (Doc Marten boots) - she gave them to me
To carry round. So humid, so thirsty
We went to Costa soon after McD
For more drinks. I took her back home early
Probably wise, tomorrow is her holiday
To Nerja near Malaga, with mummy
Who's recovering from a back injury
I hope they both relax, take things easy
And don't get sunburn, keep nice and shady!
She wanted white trainers, Nike brand, so we
Looked for them in the mall, and in JD
Sports we found some that fit, fairly quickly
And she put them on instead of her D
Ms (Doc Marten boots) - she gave them to me
To carry round. So humid, so thirsty
We went to Costa soon after McD
For more drinks. I took her back home early
Probably wise, tomorrow is her holiday
To Nerja near Malaga, with mummy
Who's recovering from a back injury
I hope they both relax, take things easy
And don't get sunburn, keep nice and shady!
Saturday 8 August 2015
3278 - Tutti footy
Hello fool, I have somehow got back in
Time to watch the first week's football highlights
At 9pm of the Football League, been
In Huddersfield all day, drinking. I might
Not only have missed this, but the great sight
Of the first Match of the Day of this year
Or season 15-16, the first night
Javi's still out, but he'll soon be back here
I hope when they show Derby's game I'll cheer
I saw some Rams fans en route to Bolton
Also lots of Reds fans hoping they might
See MUFC beat Spurs, a slight fear
In their hearts maybe, but they got a win
Now one last line, then sit back, hit the heights
Time to watch the first week's football highlights
At 9pm of the Football League, been
In Huddersfield all day, drinking. I might
Not only have missed this, but the great sight
Of the first Match of the Day of this year
Or season 15-16, the first night
Javi's still out, but he'll soon be back here
I hope when they show Derby's game I'll cheer
I saw some Rams fans en route to Bolton
Also lots of Reds fans hoping they might
See MUFC beat Spurs, a slight fear
In their hearts maybe, but they got a win
Now one last line, then sit back, hit the heights
Friday 7 August 2015
3277 - Tattoo-va
My tattoos are healing nicely. After
Getting up, tore off the clingfilm and took
A shower, the bright dye running over
The bath and shower curtain, little brook
Of red ink down the plughole, with a suck
And a bubble. Back home now, just taking
It easy, in my vest to let air circ-
ulate on the tattoos with covering
Of Bepanthen to help with the healing
Process of these three brightly-coloured scars
They're not even that sore, so I'm in luck
Now what to do tonight, I'm wondering
Might get some beer in from Sainsburys super-
market and play guitar, then TV look
Getting up, tore off the clingfilm and took
A shower, the bright dye running over
The bath and shower curtain, little brook
Of red ink down the plughole, with a suck
And a bubble. Back home now, just taking
It easy, in my vest to let air circ-
ulate on the tattoos with covering
Of Bepanthen to help with the healing
Process of these three brightly-coloured scars
They're not even that sore, so I'm in luck
Now what to do tonight, I'm wondering
Might get some beer in from Sainsburys super-
market and play guitar, then TV look
Thursday 6 August 2015
3276 - Flagging interest
Tattoos - at last - these designs have waited
About 9 months since I chose them last year
The Cheshire Cat's clawgeous, the artist did
Well, well done Adam, you deserve a cheer
Although at times the needle was severe
Cool music playing, newish stuff unknown
Next up was the text from Hungaria
Script on my back, think that should be the zone
For more texts in different lingos. I'm goin'
To Croatia soon - Croat would look good
Next to the Magyar script. Finally, there
Is now a Swiss flag on my arm, wind blowing
In my mind anyway. New lock's fitted
On the outside door - couldn't get in there!!
About 9 months since I chose them last year
The Cheshire Cat's clawgeous, the artist did
Well, well done Adam, you deserve a cheer
Although at times the needle was severe
Cool music playing, newish stuff unknown
Next up was the text from Hungaria
Script on my back, think that should be the zone
For more texts in different lingos. I'm goin'
To Croatia soon - Croat would look good
Next to the Magyar script. Finally, there
Is now a Swiss flag on my arm, wind blowing
In my mind anyway. New lock's fitted
On the outside door - couldn't get in there!!
Wednesday 5 August 2015
3275 - From Thailand to Spain via Croatia
Nice day at work, just three of us were in
And at lunchtime I met Pearl for a meal
We went to Thaikhun, two courses, filling
And tasty, catching up with news of Pearl
She's off to Croatia soon, me as well
But I'll be there about two weeks later
We're both visiting Split, it looks a real
Nice place. This evening at home, played guitar
I'm starting to play it now like a star
Although of course it's harder when playing
Live, trying to sing at the same time, tell
Me about it. Watching Barcelona
Play Roma on Spanish television
The commentary's so quick, can't catch their spiel
And at lunchtime I met Pearl for a meal
We went to Thaikhun, two courses, filling
And tasty, catching up with news of Pearl
She's off to Croatia soon, me as well
But I'll be there about two weeks later
We're both visiting Split, it looks a real
Nice place. This evening at home, played guitar
I'm starting to play it now like a star
Although of course it's harder when playing
Live, trying to sing at the same time, tell
Me about it. Watching Barcelona
Play Roma on Spanish television
The commentary's so quick, can't catch their spiel
3274 - Reggae Reggae Sauce
A good night at the Worst Comedy Night
In Salford, hosted by old Dave Turquoise
I was dog tired, pints shook in my hand, plight
Portended disaster, plus there was noise
Throughout, dub reggae wid de ridmic ploys
For de jerk chicken cookery routine
De backgroun' music helped de girls an' boys
Get into de riddim. Twenties and teens
Mebbe didna get all dem ref'rences
But overall despite my old stage fright
I remembered de lyrics an' jokes, those
Cringeworthy old chestnuts, dose ol' baked beans
So now I'll jus' settle down, tiredness quite
A ting of de past, like reggae reggae sauce
Tue 4 August
In Salford, hosted by old Dave Turquoise
I was dog tired, pints shook in my hand, plight
Portended disaster, plus there was noise
Throughout, dub reggae wid de ridmic ploys
For de jerk chicken cookery routine
De backgroun' music helped de girls an' boys
Get into de riddim. Twenties and teens
Mebbe didna get all dem ref'rences
But overall despite my old stage fright
I remembered de lyrics an' jokes, those
Cringeworthy old chestnuts, dose ol' baked beans
So now I'll jus' settle down, tiredness quite
A ting of de past, like reggae reggae sauce
Tue 4 August
Monday 3 August 2015
3273 - Jamming tomorrow
It's comedy tomorrow, reggae theme
Got to learn the words, that is the main thing
If you know the words it goes like a dream
If not, you can easily end up screwing
It up, as hesitatingly you sing
Or tell your jokes or comments, whatever
So after my tea, I'll be rehearsing
To try to learn my stuff, that's only fair
At least I was laughing when I compared
My lyrics to the originals, deemed
Quite sniggerable, although it's me saying
So myself. To sing it just like a bird
I need to run through it and get it clean
Into my memory bright and shining
Got to learn the words, that is the main thing
If you know the words it goes like a dream
If not, you can easily end up screwing
It up, as hesitatingly you sing
Or tell your jokes or comments, whatever
So after my tea, I'll be rehearsing
To try to learn my stuff, that's only fair
At least I was laughing when I compared
My lyrics to the originals, deemed
Quite sniggerable, although it's me saying
So myself. To sing it just like a bird
I need to run through it and get it clean
Into my memory bright and shining
Sunday 2 August 2015
3272 - In cold flat
Woke up real late, about ten, but since then
I've done quite a lot, and brain's sleepy now
Finished 'In Cold Blood' started end of June
My progress through it has been rather slow
But it was a good read. Long tome ago
Before I was born, a terrible crime
Was done in Kansas, people said, 'Oh no!
The poor Clutters!' They met their hanging time
After 5 years on Death Row, pantomime
Of appeals exhausted, as despised men
But Capote had interviewed them so
Extensively, this book really does chime
With crime fans and more serious readers when
He probes and seems to take us there somehow
I've done quite a lot, and brain's sleepy now
Finished 'In Cold Blood' started end of June
My progress through it has been rather slow
But it was a good read. Long tome ago
Before I was born, a terrible crime
Was done in Kansas, people said, 'Oh no!
The poor Clutters!' They met their hanging time
After 5 years on Death Row, pantomime
Of appeals exhausted, as despised men
But Capote had interviewed them so
Extensively, this book really does chime
With crime fans and more serious readers when
He probes and seems to take us there somehow
Saturday 1 August 2015
3271 - Shirt scene
Hello, can you hear me, or at least see
It's Saturday night, nearly half-past ten
I've been out of course to see my Josie
We went to Man United, she's a fan
And today was the first day, the day when
You could buy the new shirt by Adidas
The shop was crowded, we went there again
Juan Mata shirts were there, but populous
Was the Rooney shirt, guess that's no surprise
After getting home, guitar playing spree
The old French stuff by Trenet and Sablon
I've listened to this stuff repetitious
And now I can play it, oui, oui, merci
It's so much fun, oh yes it's so much fun
It's Saturday night, nearly half-past ten
I've been out of course to see my Josie
We went to Man United, she's a fan
And today was the first day, the day when
You could buy the new shirt by Adidas
The shop was crowded, we went there again
Juan Mata shirts were there, but populous
Was the Rooney shirt, guess that's no surprise
After getting home, guitar playing spree
The old French stuff by Trenet and Sablon
I've listened to this stuff repetitious
And now I can play it, oui, oui, merci
It's so much fun, oh yes it's so much fun
Friday 31 July 2015
3270 - A pizza the action
Hello, you little bastards. now I will
Summarise what happened this evening, try
Anyway. Assorted losers, a fill
Of people who have failed and yet still I
Have had a laugh with them. Pizza we try
To cook in the oven, tomato, cheese
The most basic boring pizza, sigh, sigh
But we're eating this basic stuff, oh please
But then again, my stomach will now squeeze
Some shit pizza in, try to get my fill
I forgot about food, hunger bye bye
But I shouldn't do that, no, I must seize
The day, and this shit pizza, if you will
Oh no, I said that, how stupid am I?!!
Summarise what happened this evening, try
Anyway. Assorted losers, a fill
Of people who have failed and yet still I
Have had a laugh with them. Pizza we try
To cook in the oven, tomato, cheese
The most basic boring pizza, sigh, sigh
But we're eating this basic stuff, oh please
But then again, my stomach will now squeeze
Some shit pizza in, try to get my fill
I forgot about food, hunger bye bye
But I shouldn't do that, no, I must seize
The day, and this shit pizza, if you will
Oh no, I said that, how stupid am I?!!
Thursday 30 July 2015
3269 - Just give me money
I got home and there's no sign of Javi
But his phone and his other stuff's still here
So no need right now to start to worry
His disappearance is nothing to fear
Cos it hasn't happened, but just a mere
Concern for him especially has been a
Complete lack of cash, because it appears
He didn't give his sort code to the ware-
house, so hasn't been paid! I hope he's there
Like I advised, collecting his money
Until then how can he go for a beer
I hope that he quickly becomes aware
Of what he needs to do to stay happy
And number one's getting his spends, that's clear
But his phone and his other stuff's still here
So no need right now to start to worry
His disappearance is nothing to fear
Cos it hasn't happened, but just a mere
Concern for him especially has been a
Complete lack of cash, because it appears
He didn't give his sort code to the ware-
house, so hasn't been paid! I hope he's there
Like I advised, collecting his money
Until then how can he go for a beer
I hope that he quickly becomes aware
Of what he needs to do to stay happy
And number one's getting his spends, that's clear
Wednesday 29 July 2015
3268 - Lots of strings attached
I'm getting hungry after my guitar
Session, which went quite well, again, and now
I play without looking, not like before
And strangely, it feels easier somehow
KJ and S & the B's were a wow
In my hands, all seems now so straightforward
And more practice to come, that will allow
Me to not just stand still but move forward
And then of stage performance, no coward
No comedy performers will compare
And if I keep it simple I should grow
In confidence and then become well 'ard
Anyway, before I become a bore
I'll quit this and start cooking, and so ciao!
Session, which went quite well, again, and now
I play without looking, not like before
And strangely, it feels easier somehow
KJ and S & the B's were a wow
In my hands, all seems now so straightforward
And more practice to come, that will allow
Me to not just stand still but move forward
And then of stage performance, no coward
No comedy performers will compare
And if I keep it simple I should grow
In confidence and then become well 'ard
Anyway, before I become a bore
I'll quit this and start cooking, and so ciao!
Tuesday 28 July 2015
3267 - More poems about working and food
Still a bit knackered. Like to play guitar
In a while, not much else that I could do
But first, hang out my washing, and prepare
Some tea, I'm getting hungry, and so too
No doubt is Javi who is sitting there
On his phone. Heard him this morning, a few
Giveaway noises about half-past four
(In the morning), yes, he has that nightmare
Start to the day, shift starts at six, but you
And me would I think probably rather
Have a real nightmare in bed than have to
Get up that bloody early, it's not fair
Oh God, I'm really feeling this hunger
Better finish now. For reading, thank you!
In a while, not much else that I could do
But first, hang out my washing, and prepare
Some tea, I'm getting hungry, and so too
No doubt is Javi who is sitting there
On his phone. Heard him this morning, a few
Giveaway noises about half-past four
(In the morning), yes, he has that nightmare
Start to the day, shift starts at six, but you
And me would I think probably rather
Have a real nightmare in bed than have to
Get up that bloody early, it's not fair
Oh God, I'm really feeling this hunger
Better finish now. For reading, thank you!
Monday 27 July 2015
3266 - Rock this flat
Too tired to think of what to say after
Last night's late night, although I slept til nine
I still didn't get enough. But later
After work was done, guitar went just fine
Practising without looking's what I'm tryin'
And it's surprisingly easy, you know
To travel through a musical goldmine
While watching TV. Stopped wearing shades. No
Need, if I don't look, I don't need to show
The guitar in a dark light. I just stare
At the TV, or at the trees, and I'm
Hardly trying, it seems. Soon I will blow
Them away with my improvement, I'll scare
Them and myself with six-stringed moan and whine
Last night's late night, although I slept til nine
I still didn't get enough. But later
After work was done, guitar went just fine
Practising without looking's what I'm tryin'
And it's surprisingly easy, you know
To travel through a musical goldmine
While watching TV. Stopped wearing shades. No
Need, if I don't look, I don't need to show
The guitar in a dark light. I just stare
At the TV, or at the trees, and I'm
Hardly trying, it seems. Soon I will blow
Them away with my improvement, I'll scare
Them and myself with six-stringed moan and whine
3265 - Now is now
Good evening out with Dermot and Richard
Popped in to see Fat Roland and old Phil
Busby, Debbie's brother, and he was good
But that so hot back room at the Castle
Is a bit much, so we did a shuffle
To the bar and had a good chat therein
Discussing time and other concepts, the while
Knocking back good beer, but got a soaking
On the way home. Dermot he went shopping
For pizza, of which I had a slice, pard-
on me, Now I'm typing this, really should-
n't this late on what's now Monday morning
But it's good fun, live for now, it's not hard
Life is short, make it quite enjoyable
Sun 26 July
Popped in to see Fat Roland and old Phil
Busby, Debbie's brother, and he was good
But that so hot back room at the Castle
Is a bit much, so we did a shuffle
To the bar and had a good chat therein
Discussing time and other concepts, the while
Knocking back good beer, but got a soaking
On the way home. Dermot he went shopping
For pizza, of which I had a slice, pard-
on me, Now I'm typing this, really should-
n't this late on what's now Monday morning
But it's good fun, live for now, it's not hard
Life is short, make it quite enjoyable
Sun 26 July
Sunday 26 July 2015
3264 - Hippy barthday
Always satisfying to hire a car
And get it back safely without a prang
Especially to Chorlton, that's a place where
I always lose my bearings, and feel anx-
iety, but I did it. Special thanks
To my mother, her birthday today, God
Knows how old she is, but no tanks
Could stop her in her tracks. We had
A nice meal at Ellie's. I should have had
Cod and chips, the chorizo was a far
Cry from filling, the lemon tart seeming
Far from big enough to fill my real bad
Appetite. Big up to Jo and Vee for
Being good company, we even sang!
Sat 25 July
And get it back safely without a prang
Especially to Chorlton, that's a place where
I always lose my bearings, and feel anx-
iety, but I did it. Special thanks
To my mother, her birthday today, God
Knows how old she is, but no tanks
Could stop her in her tracks. We had
A nice meal at Ellie's. I should have had
Cod and chips, the chorizo was a far
Cry from filling, the lemon tart seeming
Far from big enough to fill my real bad
Appetite. Big up to Jo and Vee for
Being good company, we even sang!
Sat 25 July
Friday 24 July 2015
3263 - Johnny B. Deade
Friday night in, a little bit of beer
Just wondering whether to get more bottles
Before a prog at ten that's on Beeb Four
About the death of rock n roll, the skulls
Of rock n rollers laugh at the feeble
Bores of today, their strings pulled by the Man
OK so was Elvis, original
He was, devoted to the blues back then
A frontier pioneer, or just a man
From the backwoods, where formed a new culture
That spread round the world with shakes and rattles
It's all down to business, all determined
By money men, not art, art keeps you poor
But I stick with it, cos I'm not fickle
Just wondering whether to get more bottles
Before a prog at ten that's on Beeb Four
About the death of rock n roll, the skulls
Of rock n rollers laugh at the feeble
Bores of today, their strings pulled by the Man
OK so was Elvis, original
He was, devoted to the blues back then
A frontier pioneer, or just a man
From the backwoods, where formed a new culture
That spread round the world with shakes and rattles
It's all down to business, all determined
By money men, not art, art keeps you poor
But I stick with it, cos I'm not fickle
Thursday 23 July 2015
3262 - Shock defeat for the Grim Reaper
After work I went film-watching again
Been to three films at Home this month. Tonight
It was a film about Wilko Johnson
Not much about his music, but his fight
Against pancreatic cancer, giant
Tumour eventually being cut right out
In an operation, leaving him quite
Free of cancer, it seems. Saw him about
Three months ago at The Ritz - he was flout-
ing the idea of death, illness or pain
After tonight's film, they discussed the sight
We'd just seen, and Wilko's successful bout
With the Grim Reaper, Julien Temple sayin'
How much fun they had filming it. Good night!
Been to three films at Home this month. Tonight
It was a film about Wilko Johnson
Not much about his music, but his fight
Against pancreatic cancer, giant
Tumour eventually being cut right out
In an operation, leaving him quite
Free of cancer, it seems. Saw him about
Three months ago at The Ritz - he was flout-
ing the idea of death, illness or pain
After tonight's film, they discussed the sight
We'd just seen, and Wilko's successful bout
With the Grim Reaper, Julien Temple sayin'
How much fun they had filming it. Good night!
Wednesday 22 July 2015
3261 - Days of wine and PIN numbers
So tired today, didn't stay up THAT late
But woke up 7:15, that's early
For me. At my office desk, felt eyes start
To close, rescued by speaking to Julie
She said she'd bring some chocolate wine for me
Tomorrow, that's something that will be new
I mentioned the chocolate beer casually
And she said 'I'll bring chocolate wine for you!'
I said, 'Just for me, or for the whole crew?'
Angela said maybe on her palate
She might place a few drops quite gingerly
Meanwhile helped Javier deal with phone folk who
Were asking tricky questions all about
His debit card - needs new PIN number, see?
But woke up 7:15, that's early
For me. At my office desk, felt eyes start
To close, rescued by speaking to Julie
She said she'd bring some chocolate wine for me
Tomorrow, that's something that will be new
I mentioned the chocolate beer casually
And she said 'I'll bring chocolate wine for you!'
I said, 'Just for me, or for the whole crew?'
Angela said maybe on her palate
She might place a few drops quite gingerly
Meanwhile helped Javier deal with phone folk who
Were asking tricky questions all about
His debit card - needs new PIN number, see?
3260 - Edinbeer
A fun day at work and after work when
I took Javier to the Worst Comedy Night
In Salford, hosted by Paul. Dave was in -
disposed, rehearsing for Edinburgh. Quite
A tall order then for him. I won't fight
Myself for the honour of playing up there
Competing with so many, it's a night-
mare, to be sure, up in Edinburgh
Comedian's graveyard, place to self-bury
Not a big audience but got share of grins
The so-called difficult audience no fright
If you've got material, like anywhere
And now to bed, not so late as it's been
In the past. Nice pint of beer chocolate
Tue 21 July
I took Javier to the Worst Comedy Night
In Salford, hosted by Paul. Dave was in -
disposed, rehearsing for Edinburgh. Quite
A tall order then for him. I won't fight
Myself for the honour of playing up there
Competing with so many, it's a night-
mare, to be sure, up in Edinburgh
Comedian's graveyard, place to self-bury
Not a big audience but got share of grins
The so-called difficult audience no fright
If you've got material, like anywhere
And now to bed, not so late as it's been
In the past. Nice pint of beer chocolate
Tue 21 July
Monday 20 July 2015
3259 - Account Dracula
Up late last night with bank accounts all spread
Over my desk. Emailed Block Company
To ask accounts man why on earth he said
I owed two hundred quid, that's too many
I reckoned it was just half that money
No reply yet. Paid off my Post Office
Credit card, now just the one left to pay
That's my Tesco card, lone source of my debts
Apart from the mortgage... but come now, let's
Not dwell on that just now. Keep a cool head...
After work, wrote and practiced comedy
Will try to do more when I've written this
But first, a shave, trim eyebrows, get sorted
While there's still some light so I can see me
Over my desk. Emailed Block Company
To ask accounts man why on earth he said
I owed two hundred quid, that's too many
I reckoned it was just half that money
No reply yet. Paid off my Post Office
Credit card, now just the one left to pay
That's my Tesco card, lone source of my debts
Apart from the mortgage... but come now, let's
Not dwell on that just now. Keep a cool head...
After work, wrote and practiced comedy
Will try to do more when I've written this
But first, a shave, trim eyebrows, get sorted
While there's still some light so I can see me
Sunday 19 July 2015
3258 - You're history
Mainly stayed in, done a few things not much
Exciting but useful enough. Hung out
With Javier after he got in, now must
Try to look at historic bank accounts
To check management company's claim 'bout
Me owing them two hundred. Sure that can't
Be right, though I might owe less, wasn't quite
On track with payments in '12. Had a jaunt
To Sainsburys, spent twenty-five, but still won't
Go bankrupt this month, hopefully won't touch
The overdraft line again. Missing out
On comedy rehearsal time - my fault
Cos when I had the chance, with guitar, just
Played along to stuff (but with eyes wide shut!)
Exciting but useful enough. Hung out
With Javier after he got in, now must
Try to look at historic bank accounts
To check management company's claim 'bout
Me owing them two hundred. Sure that can't
Be right, though I might owe less, wasn't quite
On track with payments in '12. Had a jaunt
To Sainsburys, spent twenty-five, but still won't
Go bankrupt this month, hopefully won't touch
The overdraft line again. Missing out
On comedy rehearsal time - my fault
Cos when I had the chance, with guitar, just
Played along to stuff (but with eyes wide shut!)
3257 - Yesterday art gone
A day late writing this, was just too keen
When I got in last night to watch TV
There was a prog on Beeb 4 'bout the scene
In the 70s with David Bowie
Was out all day and most evening, busy
Hangin' out with my ex-wife, Vee, she's not
In the best shape, she's not all that healthy
But trying to improve her little lot
We had fun, a day out looking at art
The refurbished Whitworth Art Gallery
It's a nice size, bigger, but not obscene
Then afterwards we hung out at her flat
Had a few cans of Kronenbourg, that's been
The first drink since last Sunday - good for me!
About Sat 18 July
When I got in last night to watch TV
There was a prog on Beeb 4 'bout the scene
In the 70s with David Bowie
Was out all day and most evening, busy
Hangin' out with my ex-wife, Vee, she's not
In the best shape, she's not all that healthy
But trying to improve her little lot
We had fun, a day out looking at art
The refurbished Whitworth Art Gallery
It's a nice size, bigger, but not obscene
Then afterwards we hung out at her flat
Had a few cans of Kronenbourg, that's been
The first drink since last Sunday - good for me!
About Sat 18 July
Friday 17 July 2015
3256 - Don't take my money
It's Friday night, and I am staying in
Had lots to do, done some of it, not all
Still need to look at bank accounts, see when
I didn't pay the rent (s'what I've been told)
Back in 2012 or thereabouts. Full
Of bull they appear to be, management
Company, saying I owe money, well
I'd rather not have to pay dodgy c***s
Who I don't trust, 200 quid, I've spent
On things we need in the flat. I'm saving
For a trip in September, in the 'fall'
Of underpayments, hope I'm innocent
I hope their calculations can be binned
But I must do a complete account trawl
Had lots to do, done some of it, not all
Still need to look at bank accounts, see when
I didn't pay the rent (s'what I've been told)
Back in 2012 or thereabouts. Full
Of bull they appear to be, management
Company, saying I owe money, well
I'd rather not have to pay dodgy c***s
Who I don't trust, 200 quid, I've spent
On things we need in the flat. I'm saving
For a trip in September, in the 'fall'
Of underpayments, hope I'm innocent
I hope their calculations can be binned
But I must do a complete account trawl
Thursday 16 July 2015
3255 - Dumb defeat
My computer's half-asleep, it's real slow
I think it's struggling, and it feels quite hot
Perhaps it's near its final time to go
Anyway, it's still working, so let's put
Some words down quickly, before it's 'kaput'
Listening to Sparks radio show on Beeb 6
Talking of the BBC, it has got
Criticised a lot lately, the critics
Focusing on shows like 'The Voice' - but Strict-
ly (the very popular dancing show)
Though also dumb, is defended a lot
Because it makes money, exports and shit
I like that there's no ads, but there are no
Guarantees, its status looks nearly lost
I think it's struggling, and it feels quite hot
Perhaps it's near its final time to go
Anyway, it's still working, so let's put
Some words down quickly, before it's 'kaput'
Listening to Sparks radio show on Beeb 6
Talking of the BBC, it has got
Criticised a lot lately, the critics
Focusing on shows like 'The Voice' - but Strict-
ly (the very popular dancing show)
Though also dumb, is defended a lot
Because it makes money, exports and shit
I like that there's no ads, but there are no
Guarantees, its status looks nearly lost
Wednesday 15 July 2015
3254 - Good day at the office and flat
So this is the first full day Javi's here
And all is well, it's looking pretty good
We're even both quite interested in beer
And football is something that we both should
Be able to watch and enjoy, and food
Is not a problem either, simple tastes
On both sides, useful because we sure would
Struggle to fit it in the fridge where space
Is limited. So we have a good base
For moving forward gradually this year
The new bed's good, and for that price it should
Be! But that money's certainly no waste
Because it'll be there for the future
I could use it myself in times ahead!
And all is well, it's looking pretty good
We're even both quite interested in beer
And football is something that we both should
Be able to watch and enjoy, and food
Is not a problem either, simple tastes
On both sides, useful because we sure would
Struggle to fit it in the fridge where space
Is limited. So we have a good base
For moving forward gradually this year
The new bed's good, and for that price it should
Be! But that money's certainly no waste
Because it'll be there for the future
I could use it myself in times ahead!
Tuesday 14 July 2015
3253 - You better you bed
The exciting moment is drawing near
With the arrival of my first lodger
Within the hour. Had a moment of fear
When I made his bed and I discovered
I'd not bought sheets, so went straight out to the
Home store (I think it's Dunne's) to buy them (white)
Now hopefully he'll be happy on there
A nice new double bed and bedding, quite
Unused by anyone ever. A slight
Pang of jealousy from me with my dear
Creaky old second-hand bed, with cover
And sheets showing their age. But soon I might
Be able to upgrade flat and bed. We're
Enjoying the dawn of a new era
With the arrival of my first lodger
Within the hour. Had a moment of fear
When I made his bed and I discovered
I'd not bought sheets, so went straight out to the
Home store (I think it's Dunne's) to buy them (white)
Now hopefully he'll be happy on there
A nice new double bed and bedding, quite
Unused by anyone ever. A slight
Pang of jealousy from me with my dear
Creaky old second-hand bed, with cover
And sheets showing their age. But soon I might
Be able to upgrade flat and bed. We're
Enjoying the dawn of a new era
Monday 13 July 2015
3252 - I'll drink to that, maybe
Last week I drank on four occasions, not
The two I was aiming for, but that's a
Result of an invite, Saturday night
With Sunday as a follow-up, drank the
Remaining cans (and of course bought some more -
Six downed in all). Now back to twice a week
Should be easier from now on, when Javier
Has moved in. Company can make you seek
To be more on your best behaviour. Bleak
Loneliness is banished, and we can put
Down that beer can - unless they're a drinker
I kind of hope not, but the truth will leak
I can't rule that possibility out
Hope we can be friends and he stays a year
The two I was aiming for, but that's a
Result of an invite, Saturday night
With Sunday as a follow-up, drank the
Remaining cans (and of course bought some more -
Six downed in all). Now back to twice a week
Should be easier from now on, when Javier
Has moved in. Company can make you seek
To be more on your best behaviour. Bleak
Loneliness is banished, and we can put
Down that beer can - unless they're a drinker
I kind of hope not, but the truth will leak
I can't rule that possibility out
Hope we can be friends and he stays a year
Sunday 12 July 2015
3251 - Pushing
I'm loving life, I'm in complete control
It may not always show, I'm a loner
I have a few friends and family, not all
Have that, especially those who live on the
Social media in substitution for
Real life, and who have little that they can
When push comes to shove, genuinely offer
Anything of value to other men
(And women.) You could argue with this plan
I like to have fun, I am not a troll
I like everyone happy, like to share
Happiness, and not deprive anyone
I was brought up that way, respect to all
Have a great life, even though it's not fair
It may not always show, I'm a loner
I have a few friends and family, not all
Have that, especially those who live on the
Social media in substitution for
Real life, and who have little that they can
When push comes to shove, genuinely offer
Anything of value to other men
(And women.) You could argue with this plan
I like to have fun, I am not a troll
I like everyone happy, like to share
Happiness, and not deprive anyone
I was brought up that way, respect to all
Have a great life, even though it's not fair
3250 - Madchester United
Here we are, two thirty at night again
It seems so long now since I met Josie
And we went to Old Trafford once again
The foreign tourists in their numbers be
Takin' their selfies in front of Bobby
Denis and Georgie Best, finger pointing
I wonder how long this will last, now she
Is getting into music, referencing
Nineties Britpop and house, she's digging
The stuff I dabbled with when I was an
Oldie already, rave beats set to the
Old songs from the sixties, recycling
Mixing, nothing new, good stuff, yes, but then
As long as it sells, people are happy
Sat 11 July
It seems so long now since I met Josie
And we went to Old Trafford once again
The foreign tourists in their numbers be
Takin' their selfies in front of Bobby
Denis and Georgie Best, finger pointing
I wonder how long this will last, now she
Is getting into music, referencing
Nineties Britpop and house, she's digging
The stuff I dabbled with when I was an
Oldie already, rave beats set to the
Old songs from the sixties, recycling
Mixing, nothing new, good stuff, yes, but then
As long as it sells, people are happy
Sat 11 July
Friday 10 July 2015
3249 - Don't weaken at the weekend
Quite easily dispensed with booze Friday
I mean I didn't get any tonight
Quite pleased with that, the saving anyway
But then I've been messaged and now I might
Nay, will be out for a drink, not a bite
On Saturday. Oh well, I can afford
It this time, thanks to Javier's deposit
Still largely unspent. Sunday, though, I would
Like to buy a table and chair he could
Sit at in that room. Bed arrives Monday
And he arrives Tuesday - early that night
I hope. And now I'm thirsty, so I should
And will knock back some milk very shortly
As soon as this last line I finally write...
I mean I didn't get any tonight
Quite pleased with that, the saving anyway
But then I've been messaged and now I might
Nay, will be out for a drink, not a bite
On Saturday. Oh well, I can afford
It this time, thanks to Javier's deposit
Still largely unspent. Sunday, though, I would
Like to buy a table and chair he could
Sit at in that room. Bed arrives Monday
And he arrives Tuesday - early that night
I hope. And now I'm thirsty, so I should
And will knock back some milk very shortly
As soon as this last line I finally write...
Thursday 9 July 2015
3248 - Monkey puzzle
More energy today, that has been nice
A reasonably good appraisal meet
By recent standards, time will tell if tides
Have turned and unfairness is in retreat
I hope so, it would solve a lot of shit
I try my best and that's always been good
But some people, pen-pushers and fuckwits
Only see things in black and white, they could
Not see the wood for the trees, eyes of mud
Up to their necks in politics, office
Shenanigans, dishonest. Let them beat
Themselves up stabbing backs with smiling words
I'll always listen to my own advice
It's the best there is for myself to heed
A reasonably good appraisal meet
By recent standards, time will tell if tides
Have turned and unfairness is in retreat
I hope so, it would solve a lot of shit
I try my best and that's always been good
But some people, pen-pushers and fuckwits
Only see things in black and white, they could
Not see the wood for the trees, eyes of mud
Up to their necks in politics, office
Shenanigans, dishonest. Let them beat
Themselves up stabbing backs with smiling words
I'll always listen to my own advice
It's the best there is for myself to heed
Wednesday 8 July 2015
3247 - Tired but not fired
Bit tired today, think it's cos was awake
A lot in the night. Not many people
In this week, Andy the boss has bad back
And Helen's son bashed his head and is ill
While Julie was off today, Emma still
Came in even though she had a sore head
What a heroine! Angela meanwhile
Was in, but far-off, quite isolated
And Caroline was in, Steve too. To bed
Quite early tonight, for my own lil sake
Tomorrow's meeting is my appraisal
The first quarterly one, showing the lead
In how I'll be marked this year. Will they take
The piss again? They have done, as a rule
A lot in the night. Not many people
In this week, Andy the boss has bad back
And Helen's son bashed his head and is ill
While Julie was off today, Emma still
Came in even though she had a sore head
What a heroine! Angela meanwhile
Was in, but far-off, quite isolated
And Caroline was in, Steve too. To bed
Quite early tonight, for my own lil sake
Tomorrow's meeting is my appraisal
The first quarterly one, showing the lead
In how I'll be marked this year. Will they take
The piss again? They have done, as a rule
Tuesday 7 July 2015
3246 - Mucho dinero ahora
I've got a lodger, Javier from Spain
I'm excited, can practice my Spanish
And learn so much more, it won't be in vain
Collected the deposit, Cornbrook, whizzed
On tram to Bensons 4 Beds, bought a swish
Double bed, ten instalments of forty
Quid, with storage beneath. And now I wish
The bed arrives early morning Monday
Then I can go to work and all will be
Sorted nicely, and fun begins again
Replacing Louis' excellent laughs with
The company of a Spanish guy, he
Seems good-hearted, amigos that's the main
Thing (cosa), now this year should be good-ish!
I'm excited, can practice my Spanish
And learn so much more, it won't be in vain
Collected the deposit, Cornbrook, whizzed
On tram to Bensons 4 Beds, bought a swish
Double bed, ten instalments of forty
Quid, with storage beneath. And now I wish
The bed arrives early morning Monday
Then I can go to work and all will be
Sorted nicely, and fun begins again
Replacing Louis' excellent laughs with
The company of a Spanish guy, he
Seems good-hearted, amigos that's the main
Thing (cosa), now this year should be good-ish!
Monday 6 July 2015
3245 - Rain rain, you won't go away
In between two viewings this second evening
Last night, the Polish girl, tonight, Javier
From Spain (with two mates). While here, heard the ring
Of my phone, someone else, she's called Eva
Is coming to view it in half an hour
It's very dark, rain-clouds grey and heavy
Not a great advert for British summer
And tomorrow night, for the comedy
The forecast's terrible, don't think I'll be
Taking my guitar, probably not doing
The song-based act I had planned, so I'll spare
Myself rehearsals of them, and maybe
Instead tonight I'll do some selecting
Of old jokes and write new ones to try there
Last night, the Polish girl, tonight, Javier
From Spain (with two mates). While here, heard the ring
Of my phone, someone else, she's called Eva
Is coming to view it in half an hour
It's very dark, rain-clouds grey and heavy
Not a great advert for British summer
And tomorrow night, for the comedy
The forecast's terrible, don't think I'll be
Taking my guitar, probably not doing
The song-based act I had planned, so I'll spare
Myself rehearsals of them, and maybe
Instead tonight I'll do some selecting
Of old jokes and write new ones to try there
Sunday 5 July 2015
3244 - Room with a view, and a boiler
I've finally advertised the flat. I took
Some good photos before the clouds appeared
And the skies opened. One girl came to look
As soon as the ad was placed. It looked good
She seemed keen, but saw the room, is afraid
Of boilers, and decided to say no
A Polish girl in leather, but she said
No.... Immediately she was keen to go
Oh well, this happens a lot, I don't know
Who'll say yes, hope they're not mad, and not fucked
Up in the head, and therefore not too weird
Tomorrow, a guy called Javier will show
Up at seven, no bed yet, but with luck
I can get one quickly from Old Trafford
Some good photos before the clouds appeared
And the skies opened. One girl came to look
As soon as the ad was placed. It looked good
She seemed keen, but saw the room, is afraid
Of boilers, and decided to say no
A Polish girl in leather, but she said
No.... Immediately she was keen to go
Oh well, this happens a lot, I don't know
Who'll say yes, hope they're not mad, and not fucked
Up in the head, and therefore not too weird
Tomorrow, a guy called Javier will show
Up at seven, no bed yet, but with luck
I can get one quickly from Old Trafford
Saturday 4 July 2015
3243 - Quays to the city
A warm day, went out in shorts and t-shirt
On the train to see Jo, had a coffee
At Tania's, her back's broken but not worse
Than it was before her brace (fits nicely)
Avoiding in Ramadan the city
Centre where possible, we caught the bus
Part way to Salford Quays, got off safely
Despite a madman on the bus, then passed
Some time in Costa, and sat on the grass
Then sat by Man U's stadium talkin' bout
Britpop and Madchester, that's what Josie
Likes now, the Gallaghers from Oasis
Blur and the Stone Roses, she knows their 'shit'
While it's all funny memories for me
On the train to see Jo, had a coffee
At Tania's, her back's broken but not worse
Than it was before her brace (fits nicely)
Avoiding in Ramadan the city
Centre where possible, we caught the bus
Part way to Salford Quays, got off safely
Despite a madman on the bus, then passed
Some time in Costa, and sat on the grass
Then sat by Man U's stadium talkin' bout
Britpop and Madchester, that's what Josie
Likes now, the Gallaghers from Oasis
Blur and the Stone Roses, she knows their 'shit'
While it's all funny memories for me
Friday 3 July 2015
3242 - Poor young soul
Straight after work I went to Home, the new
Trendy cinema, the new Cornerhouse
In Tony Wilson Place (ha ha!), and you
Know it's near the 'Hacienda' flats that house
The spawn of the rich, beards and lower face
With hairy covering, and the men too
Why did I go to Tony Wilson Place?
To see the film 'bout Amy You-Know-Who
It was fun watching clips when she would do
Her fun teenage stuff, but it seemed although
She was a top singer from those young years
With good friends, she needed weed and booze too
Everything else was bound to happen to
Her, talent notwithstanding, poor lil mouse
Trendy cinema, the new Cornerhouse
In Tony Wilson Place (ha ha!), and you
Know it's near the 'Hacienda' flats that house
The spawn of the rich, beards and lower face
With hairy covering, and the men too
Why did I go to Tony Wilson Place?
To see the film 'bout Amy You-Know-Who
It was fun watching clips when she would do
Her fun teenage stuff, but it seemed although
She was a top singer from those young years
With good friends, she needed weed and booze too
Everything else was bound to happen to
Her, talent notwithstanding, poor lil mouse
Thursday 2 July 2015
3241 - Worry flurry
Now for today, what happened, not a lot
Back at work after one day off, and now
I'm feeling tired. I know that I should put
An advert up for the room, start to show
It off to potential renters, allow
Me to improve my lifestyle, get money
Although I admit I'm worried somehow
Who will it be, will we get on, will he
Or she be clean, well-behaved, trustworthy
However, I think probably I will not
Do that tonight. Energy-wise, I'm low
Might play guitar, Chevalier and Rossi
And then Serge G are next up, they are hot
Stuff to play along to (tu sais) you know
Back at work after one day off, and now
I'm feeling tired. I know that I should put
An advert up for the room, start to show
It off to potential renters, allow
Me to improve my lifestyle, get money
Although I admit I'm worried somehow
Who will it be, will we get on, will he
Or she be clean, well-behaved, trustworthy
However, I think probably I will not
Do that tonight. Energy-wise, I'm low
Might play guitar, Chevalier and Rossi
And then Serge G are next up, they are hot
Stuff to play along to (tu sais) you know
3240 - Yesterday's no more
Oops, I forgot to do this yesterday
No excuses either, I was at home
But as I played guitar like crazy
(Nico, Elvis, Beefheart), the aroma
Of a fag drifted up from the smoker
In the flat below, through my open door
Onto the balcony, felt the desire
And so popped out to the Sainsbury store
To get three bottles. That means can't have more
Now for the rest of the week, not Friday
Or the weekend, even. I can't have some
More booze til Monday. Twice per week's my law
Need to succeed with it, to save more pay
To put towards the holiday to come
about Wed 1 July
No excuses either, I was at home
But as I played guitar like crazy
(Nico, Elvis, Beefheart), the aroma
Of a fag drifted up from the smoker
In the flat below, through my open door
Onto the balcony, felt the desire
And so popped out to the Sainsbury store
To get three bottles. That means can't have more
Now for the rest of the week, not Friday
Or the weekend, even. I can't have some
More booze til Monday. Twice per week's my law
Need to succeed with it, to save more pay
To put towards the holiday to come
about Wed 1 July
Tuesday 30 June 2015
3239 - In a pint pot
Listening to 'In A Rut' - no special cause
Except it's on my headphones, my playlist
Just got in from work, left there 'early doors'
(Yuk, I hate that phrase!) Next I shall get pissed
Starting off at the Brewdog, then visit
A few more places maybe, during which
Time I'll discuss with John recent tourist
Activities of ours, then we will switch
To planning our jaunt in September, ditch
Suitcases, just a bag each, not all floors
We'll be on, or pavements, but hills that twist
And potholes in the Balkans. Had some chips
At lunchtime from the Hip Hop Chip Shop - now's
Tea-time but think I'll miss it, miss miss missed
Except it's on my headphones, my playlist
Just got in from work, left there 'early doors'
(Yuk, I hate that phrase!) Next I shall get pissed
Starting off at the Brewdog, then visit
A few more places maybe, during which
Time I'll discuss with John recent tourist
Activities of ours, then we will switch
To planning our jaunt in September, ditch
Suitcases, just a bag each, not all floors
We'll be on, or pavements, but hills that twist
And potholes in the Balkans. Had some chips
At lunchtime from the Hip Hop Chip Shop - now's
Tea-time but think I'll miss it, miss miss missed
Monday 29 June 2015
3238 - Heatwave nights
Too tired to do much tonight, don't know why
So tonight's a write-off, but I've done well
Last two nights being good and staying dry
They say a heatwave's starting. It's been cool
Most of the spring, but tonight could be hell
If it gets too hot. I still like the heat
Of summer though, short-lived, excitable
It's like being abroad, you lie and sweat
And feel young again from head down to feet
I'm struggling now with this, I cannot lie
My mind's unwinding, falling down a well
I feel dead on my feet, completely beat
Drink tomorrow night with John, then Wednesday
Off work, catch up, got a spare room to fill
So tonight's a write-off, but I've done well
Last two nights being good and staying dry
They say a heatwave's starting. It's been cool
Most of the spring, but tonight could be hell
If it gets too hot. I still like the heat
Of summer though, short-lived, excitable
It's like being abroad, you lie and sweat
And feel young again from head down to feet
I'm struggling now with this, I cannot lie
My mind's unwinding, falling down a well
I feel dead on my feet, completely beat
Drink tomorrow night with John, then Wednesday
Off work, catch up, got a spare room to fill
3237 - Make it hard
Completely forgot to do yesterday's
Sonnet diary. Well, remembered at one
Point, but then forgot again as I based
Myself in the moment, distracted from
A magazine, a TV show. Early on
I painted walls and window sills all white
Trying to cover discolouration
Brown stains and dirty fingerprints. It's nice
Now but not even. Guess I need advice
In decorating technique in this place
Played guitar, struggled at first, the volume
Was a bit quiet to hear the music, plus
I wore my Soviet hat and some dark shades
To make it harder like a performance
About Sun 28 June
Sonnet diary. Well, remembered at one
Point, but then forgot again as I based
Myself in the moment, distracted from
A magazine, a TV show. Early on
I painted walls and window sills all white
Trying to cover discolouration
Brown stains and dirty fingerprints. It's nice
Now but not even. Guess I need advice
In decorating technique in this place
Played guitar, struggled at first, the volume
Was a bit quiet to hear the music, plus
I wore my Soviet hat and some dark shades
To make it harder like a performance
About Sun 28 June
Saturday 27 June 2015
3236 - Is it safe?
Been to see Josie, and her mum with her
Broken back in a brace, recovering
Or trying to, while perched on the sofa
Didn't go to Manchester, worrying
About terrorist attacks is spreading
Her mum and her were worried of the threat
Especially in Ramadan, with frightening
Reports on the news of some beheaded
Victim, or a mosque bombed, or beach of death
So went to Heaton Chapel, big dinner
(Lunch) and cheesecake, my stomach was hurting
Couldn't finish my Coke. Then to Stockport
Wandered round the shops and sat in Costa
Pleased that tonight, from drink I'm abstaining
Broken back in a brace, recovering
Or trying to, while perched on the sofa
Didn't go to Manchester, worrying
About terrorist attacks is spreading
Her mum and her were worried of the threat
Especially in Ramadan, with frightening
Reports on the news of some beheaded
Victim, or a mosque bombed, or beach of death
So went to Heaton Chapel, big dinner
(Lunch) and cheesecake, my stomach was hurting
Couldn't finish my Coke. Then to Stockport
Wandered round the shops and sat in Costa
Pleased that tonight, from drink I'm abstaining
Friday 26 June 2015
3235 - Flaming flamenco
As predicted, I'm continuing to drink
Following last night's excess of booze
The sun still shines, it's rays have yet to sink
These summer nights are kind of an excuse
It invites partying, you cannot lose
But then so does the winter when it's dark
All seasons point at me like they accuse
But let's accept their dictates and their mark
It's useless to resist, it is mere talk
Life is being alive, no time to think
Just watched a great TV prog 'bout the blues
Not from the States, but Spain, flamenco rocks
Great gypsy passion, dancing, guitar, drink
And cigarettes, flame on, how can you lose?
Following last night's excess of booze
The sun still shines, it's rays have yet to sink
These summer nights are kind of an excuse
It invites partying, you cannot lose
But then so does the winter when it's dark
All seasons point at me like they accuse
But let's accept their dictates and their mark
It's useless to resist, it is mere talk
Life is being alive, no time to think
Just watched a great TV prog 'bout the blues
Not from the States, but Spain, flamenco rocks
Great gypsy passion, dancing, guitar, drink
And cigarettes, flame on, how can you lose?
3234 - One more for the road
Another good night, third night in a row
This was at Fitzgeralds Bar, Speakeasy
An interesting group, people from all o-
ver, Spanish, American. Portuguee
Just exactly how it is socially
And Dermot as well, of course, booze was had
Is it wrong, to do this on a Thursday
Is it wrong to do this, yes, is it bad
Probably, but this has been done, not sad
Or maybe it is, I don't know. I know
Now that I only have one more night free
To drink, that''ll be tomorrow, to add
One more bad night this week then I must go
Back into hibernation. So naughty...
Thur 25 June
This was at Fitzgeralds Bar, Speakeasy
An interesting group, people from all o-
ver, Spanish, American. Portuguee
Just exactly how it is socially
And Dermot as well, of course, booze was had
Is it wrong, to do this on a Thursday
Is it wrong to do this, yes, is it bad
Probably, but this has been done, not sad
Or maybe it is, I don't know. I know
Now that I only have one more night free
To drink, that''ll be tomorrow, to add
One more bad night this week then I must go
Back into hibernation. So naughty...
Thur 25 June
Wednesday 24 June 2015
3233 - E-fish-ent
Another long day of work and pleasure
This evening after work, it was a meal
To celebrate Nancy's birthday, and a
Costly but memorable meal, the real deal
Sushumi, it's called, raw fish, it appealed
To my tastebuds, and so did the green sprigs
And even a flower was not withheld
From my digestive system. So that ticks
Off another experience. A good mix
Of friends around the table, most strangers
To me, but I knew Liz, that memorable
Fancy dress night two years ago that sticks
In my thoughts. Cos we hadn't met before
Some had nerves, but it wasn't bad at all
This evening after work, it was a meal
To celebrate Nancy's birthday, and a
Costly but memorable meal, the real deal
Sushumi, it's called, raw fish, it appealed
To my tastebuds, and so did the green sprigs
And even a flower was not withheld
From my digestive system. So that ticks
Off another experience. A good mix
Of friends around the table, most strangers
To me, but I knew Liz, that memorable
Fancy dress night two years ago that sticks
In my thoughts. Cos we hadn't met before
Some had nerves, but it wasn't bad at all
3232 - Early night - just after midnight
I'm doing well in keeping off the sauce
On week-nights - just been out to comedy
And had just one pint, not enough of course
To get into that spiral so needy
Where I crave more, and fags too, indeedy
I buy more on the way home and drink more
Staying up late, dehydrating, money-
Terminating, stagnating, staying poor
Even if I've had a good night before
During and after. I got some applause
Doing my God act, playing God (hee hee)
But although I was sober, failed before
Them all, forgot the words, felt a lost cause
Whereas I should've gone on fearlessly
Tue 23 June
On week-nights - just been out to comedy
And had just one pint, not enough of course
To get into that spiral so needy
Where I crave more, and fags too, indeedy
I buy more on the way home and drink more
Staying up late, dehydrating, money-
Terminating, stagnating, staying poor
Even if I've had a good night before
During and after. I got some applause
Doing my God act, playing God (hee hee)
But although I was sober, failed before
Them all, forgot the words, felt a lost cause
Whereas I should've gone on fearlessly
Tue 23 June
Monday 22 June 2015
3231 - Not enough hours in the evening
Phew - been busy this eve since I got home!
And it's not the end yet, still time to go
Not painted tonight, but exercise done
My muscles are improving, can now do
Eighty press-ups. The first time I tried to
Do them, could only do three! Muscles need
Regular usage, and my walks and few
Exercises play their part, yes indeed
Transferred a debt balance from card to card
Also phoned O2 on my mobile phone
Got new SIM-card-only contract, woo-hoo
Ten quid a month's enough. Cooked and ate food
Great guitar session, comedy part-learned
Will learn more, but must ring Tania and Jo
And it's not the end yet, still time to go
Not painted tonight, but exercise done
My muscles are improving, can now do
Eighty press-ups. The first time I tried to
Do them, could only do three! Muscles need
Regular usage, and my walks and few
Exercises play their part, yes indeed
Transferred a debt balance from card to card
Also phoned O2 on my mobile phone
Got new SIM-card-only contract, woo-hoo
Ten quid a month's enough. Cooked and ate food
Great guitar session, comedy part-learned
Will learn more, but must ring Tania and Jo
Sunday 21 June 2015
3230 - It'll be all-white on the night
I'm happy with my Father's Day alone
Been out plenty, Friday and Saturday
Had cards and prezzies, pictures on my phone
But felt a bit worn-out, late yesterday
So I decided I'd stay in today
Need to refresh, and also to rehearse
My comedy, which as usual, was way
Rushed, had a quick read of it while the noise
From the washing machine span round my ears
Yet more white paint on bedroom wall, it's done
Now more or less, the paint tin's near-empty
And at last the walls look white like they're s'posed
To, not so streaky and brownish. Backbone
Broken, poor Tania's in a ward today
Been out plenty, Friday and Saturday
Had cards and prezzies, pictures on my phone
But felt a bit worn-out, late yesterday
So I decided I'd stay in today
Need to refresh, and also to rehearse
My comedy, which as usual, was way
Rushed, had a quick read of it while the noise
From the washing machine span round my ears
Yet more white paint on bedroom wall, it's done
Now more or less, the paint tin's near-empty
And at last the walls look white like they're s'posed
To, not so streaky and brownish. Backbone
Broken, poor Tania's in a ward today
Saturday 20 June 2015
3229 - They don't know what to do with their lives
I must admit I don't feel quite tip top
I should hopefully sleep quite well tonight
May have overdone it slightly, yep
Too much work and walking yesterday, quite
Knackered and slightly ill now. But despite
That, a drink or two, time to celebrate
Relaxing for a few hours now, a flight
Of fingers on my guitar, then acquaint
Myself with Big Brother, I was too late
Last night to see which housemate got the chop
Channel 5 doing its usual job to slight
The British working classes without jobs
Where are the jobs nowadays we create
For the less gifted, less rich? None in sight
I should hopefully sleep quite well tonight
May have overdone it slightly, yep
Too much work and walking yesterday, quite
Knackered and slightly ill now. But despite
That, a drink or two, time to celebrate
Relaxing for a few hours now, a flight
Of fingers on my guitar, then acquaint
Myself with Big Brother, I was too late
Last night to see which housemate got the chop
Channel 5 doing its usual job to slight
The British working classes without jobs
Where are the jobs nowadays we create
For the less gifted, less rich? None in sight
3228 - Souper trouper
What a long day, woke just after seven
Dozed for a bit, rose seven twenty five
Well, lying in bed is close to heaven
And I drifted, listening to Beeb Five Live
Got to the office at eight twenty five
It seems like yesterday, technically, it is
Worked hard as usual, annual report jive
Queries and such, the usual thankless biz
Some laughs with Emma, who is quite a wheeze
And quite a sneeze with her hay fever. Then
Walked to the station, met Jo, caught train to arrive
In Manchester, to Vee and Pearl's flat, these
Last moments with Pearl, meal at half seven
Tampopo, Laksa soup, Walked miles. Survived.
Fri 19 June
Dozed for a bit, rose seven twenty five
Well, lying in bed is close to heaven
And I drifted, listening to Beeb Five Live
Got to the office at eight twenty five
It seems like yesterday, technically, it is
Worked hard as usual, annual report jive
Queries and such, the usual thankless biz
Some laughs with Emma, who is quite a wheeze
And quite a sneeze with her hay fever. Then
Walked to the station, met Jo, caught train to arrive
In Manchester, to Vee and Pearl's flat, these
Last moments with Pearl, meal at half seven
Tampopo, Laksa soup, Walked miles. Survived.
Fri 19 June
Thursday 18 June 2015
3227 - Don't break the rules
It's hay fever season, almost mid-year
The summer solstice only days away
I love the late light evenings while they're here
Watching Big Brother, keeping blues at bay
Not drinking, my new plan is still okay
Which is to only drink two nights from three
At the weekend (from Friday to Sunday)
That's do-able, logical and thrifty
Must set rules that are realistic for me
Good advice in the office from Emma
Not to buy a new bed yet in case they
(The lodger) has their own, though it will be
Hard to get a heavy bed up the stairs
And into the flat. We'll see what they say
The summer solstice only days away
I love the late light evenings while they're here
Watching Big Brother, keeping blues at bay
Not drinking, my new plan is still okay
Which is to only drink two nights from three
At the weekend (from Friday to Sunday)
That's do-able, logical and thrifty
Must set rules that are realistic for me
Good advice in the office from Emma
Not to buy a new bed yet in case they
(The lodger) has their own, though it will be
Hard to get a heavy bed up the stairs
And into the flat. We'll see what they say
Wednesday 17 June 2015
3226 - Saving it
A nine hour day at work today, by God
Consequently, I'm not too energised
Glad I did the painting last night when could
Though started late, the sun was out, I rised
To the task, stepped up to the plate, surmised
It would be lighter than tomorrow (now)
And that was right, today's dull cloudy skies
Have produced lots of rain during work hours
But I kept dry inside as drank the flowers
The heaven-sent liquid manna, like blood
Into a vampire's throat, fangs sank in thighs
I'm sort of up to date, I'll rest my bod
Saving money, relaxing, it feels wise
Consequently, I'm not too energised
Glad I did the painting last night when could
Though started late, the sun was out, I rised
To the task, stepped up to the plate, surmised
It would be lighter than tomorrow (now)
And that was right, today's dull cloudy skies
Have produced lots of rain during work hours
But I kept dry inside as drank the flowers
The heaven-sent liquid manna, like blood
Into a vampire's throat, fangs sank in thighs
I'm sort of up to date, I'll rest my bod
Saving money, relaxing, it feels wise
3225 - The One Day Late Show
Oops, one day late, I did so much last night
I didn't post a sonnet, clean forgot
The main reason was painting the walls white
In the spare room (I didn't start til 8)
Then played guitar, watched Big Brother til late
And went to bed with 'Mrs Dalloway'
By Virginia Woolf, depression and fate
Of a gloomy end looming large each day
As borne out by Ginny's watery way
Of ending it all, fed up of her plight
In real life (and death). Well, now that I've put
This belated entry online, today
Will be covered shortly, when I shall write
About Wednesday - that's today - not as hot
Tue 16 June
I didn't post a sonnet, clean forgot
The main reason was painting the walls white
In the spare room (I didn't start til 8)
Then played guitar, watched Big Brother til late
And went to bed with 'Mrs Dalloway'
By Virginia Woolf, depression and fate
Of a gloomy end looming large each day
As borne out by Ginny's watery way
Of ending it all, fed up of her plight
In real life (and death). Well, now that I've put
This belated entry online, today
Will be covered shortly, when I shall write
About Wednesday - that's today - not as hot
Tue 16 June
Monday 15 June 2015
3224 - The fun factor
Think I'll play some guitar soon tonight, not
Doing anything special. I won't paint
The spare room tonight. Its final white coat
Can wait a day or two, but what won't wait
Is guitar practice. My skill will grow faint
If I don't put in a shift frequently
So tonight, when this sonnet's done, a great
Time - some dance, some reggae and R and B
It's time to forget about jihadi
For a minute and produce western art
Decadent art maybe, not of the saint
But then it's a craft, so is comedy
Like fishing or carpentry, could be lost
If someone preserves not just the ancient
Doing anything special. I won't paint
The spare room tonight. Its final white coat
Can wait a day or two, but what won't wait
Is guitar practice. My skill will grow faint
If I don't put in a shift frequently
So tonight, when this sonnet's done, a great
Time - some dance, some reggae and R and B
It's time to forget about jihadi
For a minute and produce western art
Decadent art maybe, not of the saint
But then it's a craft, so is comedy
Like fishing or carpentry, could be lost
If someone preserves not just the ancient
Sunday 14 June 2015
3223 - Age of enlightenment (of the hair)
Went with Josie to Old T yet again
This time there was a fun match on
Man U Legends (old players) up against
Bayern Munich All-Stars, including one
Old great from my childhood years, the German
World Cup winner from '74, Paul
Breitner, then he had an afro, long gone
Now just thin grey hair ... how the hair does fall
Out in places, and get thinner. It's all
So inevitable, Paul. Yes, a win
For the home team, Jo's brought luck when we've gone
To watch games there, three out of three. Walk tall
United fans, though they're below the en-
emy, City, at present (they've less funds...!!)
This time there was a fun match on
Man U Legends (old players) up against
Bayern Munich All-Stars, including one
Old great from my childhood years, the German
World Cup winner from '74, Paul
Breitner, then he had an afro, long gone
Now just thin grey hair ... how the hair does fall
Out in places, and get thinner. It's all
So inevitable, Paul. Yes, a win
For the home team, Jo's brought luck when we've gone
To watch games there, three out of three. Walk tall
United fans, though they're below the en-
emy, City, at present (they've less funds...!!)
Saturday 13 June 2015
3222 - Buy Shitty Rollers
A fairly good day, painted the spare room
Having found some paint, well eventually
After Argos, despite web claims, had none
I bought a new doormat, and shirt from T.
K. Maxx, then walked up Regent Road to see
If I could buy some paint from a big store
Thought there might be one there near PMT
Music shop, and there was a Screwfix there
I listened to cassettes while everywhere
On the spare room walls tried to remove gloom
Finger marks, nasty stains that they won't be
Pleased to see if they view the room. I swear
It's still not right, one more time I must zoom
Over the walls with yet more paint, Monday
Having found some paint, well eventually
After Argos, despite web claims, had none
I bought a new doormat, and shirt from T.
K. Maxx, then walked up Regent Road to see
If I could buy some paint from a big store
Thought there might be one there near PMT
Music shop, and there was a Screwfix there
I listened to cassettes while everywhere
On the spare room walls tried to remove gloom
Finger marks, nasty stains that they won't be
Pleased to see if they view the room. I swear
It's still not right, one more time I must zoom
Over the walls with yet more paint, Monday
Friday 12 June 2015
3221 - 'Good' and 'fun' don't mix
Is it the right thing to do, to cut down
On cigs and booze, although it's healthier
Does it mean I'm boring and old and brown
Tired, burned out, over the hill, washed up, square?
Boozing is partying, fun, debonair
Being good is like my parents, boring
What's the point of that, boredom's heard to bear
Aren't I allowed a Friday night's drinking?
Psychologically weak at resisting
Like English footballers in big games, found
Lily-livered, bashful and full of fear
As has happened before, just the thinking
About this on a Friday night is grounds
For rushing out to buy booze, just, once, more...?
On cigs and booze, although it's healthier
Does it mean I'm boring and old and brown
Tired, burned out, over the hill, washed up, square?
Boozing is partying, fun, debonair
Being good is like my parents, boring
What's the point of that, boredom's heard to bear
Aren't I allowed a Friday night's drinking?
Psychologically weak at resisting
Like English footballers in big games, found
Lily-livered, bashful and full of fear
As has happened before, just the thinking
About this on a Friday night is grounds
For rushing out to buy booze, just, once, more...?
Thursday 11 June 2015
3220 - Get in!
I'll quickly write this, then play my guitar
Then watch Top of the Pops 1980
Not sure if I'll do much after that, for
It'll be getting late, and energy
And will-power running out. Still, I am free
To decide to do anything, nothing
That's not always a possibility
Want to stop drinks and smokes the remaining
Half of this month and beyond, and looking
For a new bed, but first task's buying a
Paint roller and white paint, brighten up the
Unused bedroom, then start advertising
For a tenant for it. Could be before
My September Balkan break, hopefully
Then watch Top of the Pops 1980
Not sure if I'll do much after that, for
It'll be getting late, and energy
And will-power running out. Still, I am free
To decide to do anything, nothing
That's not always a possibility
Want to stop drinks and smokes the remaining
Half of this month and beyond, and looking
For a new bed, but first task's buying a
Paint roller and white paint, brighten up the
Unused bedroom, then start advertising
For a tenant for it. Could be before
My September Balkan break, hopefully
Wednesday 10 June 2015
3219 - Through the media darkly
Very tired, often am in midsummer
When those light mornings get inside my mind
Spent what seemed like hours listening to the
Night-time radio, hearing horror of blind
Hate and sexism in Middle East land
I think that made it hard for me to drop
Off for a while, so hard to understand
But how much do we really know from top
To bottom, is it all bad or to stop
Believing what you hear and see, media
Bias towards the west we understand
Can prevent the whole truth being served up
Life is chaos, it's very rarely fair
All we can do is work hard til the end
When those light mornings get inside my mind
Spent what seemed like hours listening to the
Night-time radio, hearing horror of blind
Hate and sexism in Middle East land
I think that made it hard for me to drop
Off for a while, so hard to understand
But how much do we really know from top
To bottom, is it all bad or to stop
Believing what you hear and see, media
Bias towards the west we understand
Can prevent the whole truth being served up
Life is chaos, it's very rarely fair
All we can do is work hard til the end
3218 - Yesterday, today, tomorrow
Oh no, we didn't win the quiz tonight
First time we've not won when I have been there
A sinking feeling, when losers unite
I'm doing my best to fend off despair
Maybe my mistake was offering no prayer
Still there's always tomorrow, so they say
Next time maybe we will win once more
Trying to write this before a new day
Don't think I'll do it, one minute away
Can write quickly, but not that quickly write
Listening to Paperback Writer, writer
The Beatles on my headphones, Yesterday
It was yesterday when I heard that, right?
But now it's today, tomorrow is here
Tue 9 June
First time we've not won when I have been there
A sinking feeling, when losers unite
I'm doing my best to fend off despair
Maybe my mistake was offering no prayer
Still there's always tomorrow, so they say
Next time maybe we will win once more
Trying to write this before a new day
Don't think I'll do it, one minute away
Can write quickly, but not that quickly write
Listening to Paperback Writer, writer
The Beatles on my headphones, Yesterday
It was yesterday when I heard that, right?
But now it's today, tomorrow is here
Tue 9 June
Monday 8 June 2015
3217 - The Russian wind is coming
Not enough sleep last night, can't wait to get
In bed, no energy left. Watched two hours
Of a French film, will watch the rest the next
Time I get the time, between sun and showers
The sun's still up, but will it allow us
To finish before its gold light has gone
It's fairly chilly, Russian winds blow us
Or Arctic or Atlantic, where've they come
From, not sure. Tomorrow, presentation
At work, and a submission to submit
And later, a quiz in the pub, where pours
The beer once more, as it did last night. Fun
I suppose, but I think I must try yet
Once more to stop for a while, get focus
In bed, no energy left. Watched two hours
Of a French film, will watch the rest the next
Time I get the time, between sun and showers
The sun's still up, but will it allow us
To finish before its gold light has gone
It's fairly chilly, Russian winds blow us
Or Arctic or Atlantic, where've they come
From, not sure. Tomorrow, presentation
At work, and a submission to submit
And later, a quiz in the pub, where pours
The beer once more, as it did last night. Fun
I suppose, but I think I must try yet
Once more to stop for a while, get focus
3216 - I am an anarchist
Hello, it's me again, well who else would
It be on my blog? It's late Sunday night
I've had a few pints and I'm feeling good
Now it's my task to put in words my plight
I'm sorry, but things are going quite right
Misery isn't what you'll get from me
Quite the contrary, most things are all right
Despite what you might try to do to me
No, the truth is that though I'm not healthy
Because I don't subscribe to normalhood
I'm still here, unabashed, and with some fight
Left in me, what can you do? Should you be
Apologetic? No, of course not, in your hood
You feel safe, but in the world, this feels right
Sunday 7 June
Saturday 6 June 2015
3215 - Hexagon of life
The Champions League Final has just ended
And Barcelona did beat Juventus
As expected, yes, as I predicted
And they deserved it, they played the best stuff
The Cup's about to be dished out, Suarez
With his teeth will be smiling, no doubt. And
Today hung out with Josie Wosie, she's
In that pre-teen phase where she could offend
Her parents. Parents - hmmph! Old folks, the end
Of respectability for us. Did
The usual walk round the Arndale, purchased
Presents for Grandma Anita. Things end
But new things begin, grab them with both hands
Only one life, as they say to all us!
And Barcelona did beat Juventus
As expected, yes, as I predicted
And they deserved it, they played the best stuff
The Cup's about to be dished out, Suarez
With his teeth will be smiling, no doubt. And
Today hung out with Josie Wosie, she's
In that pre-teen phase where she could offend
Her parents. Parents - hmmph! Old folks, the end
Of respectability for us. Did
The usual walk round the Arndale, purchased
Presents for Grandma Anita. Things end
But new things begin, grab them with both hands
Only one life, as they say to all us!
Friday 5 June 2015
3214 - Have a break, have a chit-chat
A nice sunny summer evening. Trouble is
I'm finding it hard to resist the lure
Of a relaxing drink and smoke, though this
Is what I did last night, had so much brew
While out and then back at home, had to pour
The last half-bottle away down the sink
Just had to go to bed at last, before
There wasn't time to sleep before getting
Up for work. At work, not that many in
Our team were there, but good old Emma was
And so we had a good chat, good jaw-jaw
Some fun and some quite serious discussion
It's reassured me that sometimes at least
Some people aren't so bad as others are
I'm finding it hard to resist the lure
Of a relaxing drink and smoke, though this
Is what I did last night, had so much brew
While out and then back at home, had to pour
The last half-bottle away down the sink
Just had to go to bed at last, before
There wasn't time to sleep before getting
Up for work. At work, not that many in
Our team were there, but good old Emma was
And so we had a good chat, good jaw-jaw
Some fun and some quite serious discussion
It's reassured me that sometimes at least
Some people aren't so bad as others are
Thursday 4 June 2015
3213 - Nothing ventured...
As ever, it's always worth venturing
Out. I was invited to a poetry
Slam at Fuel Bar, not imagining
I'd win, and I didn't, but met Tuesday
Tony, a comedy compere, he told me
I should go to Montpellier next Thursday
Which I will do and do some comedy
Which seems to be my God-given forte
And then there's an event on Saturday
At Tiger Lounge, so it was worth going
Out tonight, and I also saw Jackie
Who told me about another fun day
Sorry, evening at 3MT starting
A new weird quiz she said was right for me!
Out. I was invited to a poetry
Slam at Fuel Bar, not imagining
I'd win, and I didn't, but met Tuesday
Tony, a comedy compere, he told me
I should go to Montpellier next Thursday
Which I will do and do some comedy
Which seems to be my God-given forte
And then there's an event on Saturday
At Tiger Lounge, so it was worth going
Out tonight, and I also saw Jackie
Who told me about another fun day
Sorry, evening at 3MT starting
A new weird quiz she said was right for me!
Wednesday 3 June 2015
3212 - The axe man really doth cometh
I've had a blast, playing some mean guitar
This evening after work, played Serge Gainsbourg
Followed by Steve Winwood and Traffic, far
From tired at first, exercised on the rug
Then got out the axe, got the playing bug
Some great tracks, among my faves, hypnotic
Inspiring me to cut a bluesy rug
My hands a blur, a fretboard fanatic
Frenetic fingerwork, be arthritic
Before too long at this rate, thrilled to core
At being able to play this stuff, a dog
On heat couldn't be quite as ecstatic
And now feel like a marathon runner
After crossing the finish line, a star
This evening after work, played Serge Gainsbourg
Followed by Steve Winwood and Traffic, far
From tired at first, exercised on the rug
Then got out the axe, got the playing bug
Some great tracks, among my faves, hypnotic
Inspiring me to cut a bluesy rug
My hands a blur, a fretboard fanatic
Frenetic fingerwork, be arthritic
Before too long at this rate, thrilled to core
At being able to play this stuff, a dog
On heat couldn't be quite as ecstatic
And now feel like a marathon runner
After crossing the finish line, a star
Tuesday 2 June 2015
3211 - Hidden treasure
I've just been looking for poems to read
On Thursday night at Fuel Bar, Withington
After being invited today. Need speed
Therefore to select material to win
The so-called Word Cup poetry slam, book in
Hand in my case, can't memorise jack shit
Not with the other stuff that I'm volved-in
No time, and work besides. Good news - I've writ
(In February) a new rant that's never split
From my lips, spraying spit, bile and kill-weed
I'd forgotten its existence. It turned
Up on my hard drive this evening. Eyes lit
Up as I saw that now there was no need
To write a new poem, because it's done
On Thursday night at Fuel Bar, Withington
After being invited today. Need speed
Therefore to select material to win
The so-called Word Cup poetry slam, book in
Hand in my case, can't memorise jack shit
Not with the other stuff that I'm volved-in
No time, and work besides. Good news - I've writ
(In February) a new rant that's never split
From my lips, spraying spit, bile and kill-weed
I'd forgotten its existence. It turned
Up on my hard drive this evening. Eyes lit
Up as I saw that now there was no need
To write a new poem, because it's done
Monday 1 June 2015
3210 - Blow brother blow
The weather's disgusting, cold, such strong wind
The trees outside are waving like mad fans
At a concert, the sound of much moaning
Like banshees clinging on to every branch
I thought a tree might fall down with a crunch
Against my flat, crashing through the window
Knocking me over, unconscious til lunch
It's not an evening for somewhere to go
Count myself lucky that I'm inside, bro
I hope the spring leaves have fully strengthened
And can cling on despite the gale to clinch
Their place for the summer that's started. Oh
Yes it has, it's the First of June. Begin,
Season of warmth, sweaty nights and sun-tans
The trees outside are waving like mad fans
At a concert, the sound of much moaning
Like banshees clinging on to every branch
I thought a tree might fall down with a crunch
Against my flat, crashing through the window
Knocking me over, unconscious til lunch
It's not an evening for somewhere to go
Count myself lucky that I'm inside, bro
I hope the spring leaves have fully strengthened
And can cling on despite the gale to clinch
Their place for the summer that's started. Oh
Yes it has, it's the First of June. Begin,
Season of warmth, sweaty nights and sun-tans
Sunday 31 May 2015
3209 - Evenings of light
Last day of May, the best month of the year
Or sometimes it's June, hotter, lighter nights
June starts tomorrow, and I'm off the beer
For a while, not totally, but I might
Have a good go at cutting down, despite
Since payday going out on Friday and
Having a few beers, but was still a slight
Amount really, and rest of the weekend
I've had none and I wanted none. I'll spend
(Hopefully) a lot less this month and gear
Things up to, saving for autumn's travels, flight
To Bulgaria's already paid for. Planned
Purchase of bed this month, tattoos, not sure
Maybe, maybe not. Hail, evenings of light!
Or sometimes it's June, hotter, lighter nights
June starts tomorrow, and I'm off the beer
For a while, not totally, but I might
Have a good go at cutting down, despite
Since payday going out on Friday and
Having a few beers, but was still a slight
Amount really, and rest of the weekend
I've had none and I wanted none. I'll spend
(Hopefully) a lot less this month and gear
Things up to, saving for autumn's travels, flight
To Bulgaria's already paid for. Planned
Purchase of bed this month, tattoos, not sure
Maybe, maybe not. Hail, evenings of light!
Saturday 30 May 2015
3208 - The colour of mud
Before buying a bed for the spare room
Thought it needed painting - the walls looked bad
Grimy and dirty, discoloured. The gloom
Would be dispelled by applying a tad
Of white paint over the bad patches, add
Some brightness, not that much paint was needed
There was only one pot left, so I grabbed
It in Poundstretcher. I prised off the lid
To my dismay it looked brown, but I stirred
Away with a spoon and it turned white. Spoon
Sacrificed for a good cause, time to pad
My tiny cheap brush on the wall and slide
It over those stains. But no whiteness bloomed
Instead a sort of pale brown darkly spread...
Thought it needed painting - the walls looked bad
Grimy and dirty, discoloured. The gloom
Would be dispelled by applying a tad
Of white paint over the bad patches, add
Some brightness, not that much paint was needed
There was only one pot left, so I grabbed
It in Poundstretcher. I prised off the lid
To my dismay it looked brown, but I stirred
Away with a spoon and it turned white. Spoon
Sacrificed for a good cause, time to pad
My tiny cheap brush on the wall and slide
It over those stains. But no whiteness bloomed
Instead a sort of pale brown darkly spread...
Friday 29 May 2015
3207 - Blossoms in the spring
Been on a rare gig night out to see a
Young up and coming band called the Blossoms
It's probably just Blossoms, but who gives a...
Anyway, that aside, I touched some bums...
Oops, sorry, ha ha, no, really, sir, none
Were deliberately touched, couldn't not
Crowd was dense, I touched a boy's bum
Too, and deffo didn't mean to do that
It's payday, it's here again at long last
This month I must buy a bed for the spare
Room, but wait, first I should put some
Fresh white paint on the walls so that the flat
And that room is attractive to renter
Then maybe I'll be coining some big sums
Young up and coming band called the Blossoms
It's probably just Blossoms, but who gives a...
Anyway, that aside, I touched some bums...
Oops, sorry, ha ha, no, really, sir, none
Were deliberately touched, couldn't not
Crowd was dense, I touched a boy's bum
Too, and deffo didn't mean to do that
It's payday, it's here again at long last
This month I must buy a bed for the spare
Room, but wait, first I should put some
Fresh white paint on the walls so that the flat
And that room is attractive to renter
Then maybe I'll be coining some big sums
Thursday 28 May 2015
3206 - The thousand year FIFA
Sepp Hitler, sorry, Blatter, won't resign
No matter how they unearth corruption
He obviously has no shame, just a spine
Made of stainless steel, voicing opinion
That all the naughty stuff must stop, and soon
Sorry, NOW! Now please elect me once more
He expects his minions in Cameroon
And Bahrain and Malaysia and Timor
To vote for him, so he can wipe the floor
With those bossy, domineering scions
Those pesky old world empire Europeans
Let's have a World Cup solely in Qatar
In the summer heat in the desert clime
Logical choice? It don't add up, that sum...
No matter how they unearth corruption
He obviously has no shame, just a spine
Made of stainless steel, voicing opinion
That all the naughty stuff must stop, and soon
Sorry, NOW! Now please elect me once more
He expects his minions in Cameroon
And Bahrain and Malaysia and Timor
To vote for him, so he can wipe the floor
With those bossy, domineering scions
Those pesky old world empire Europeans
Let's have a World Cup solely in Qatar
In the summer heat in the desert clime
Logical choice? It don't add up, that sum...
Wednesday 27 May 2015
3205 - No quarter for Qatar (or Blatter)
A shocking start to the day in Zurich
Dawn raids on senior FIFA potentates
At a prestigious hotel by the lake
With possible fallout affecting states
Who may have won the World Cup-hosting race
Let's hope the US legal team, allied
With the Swiss, on whose soil these things took place
Will not at all be influenced or afraid
How long since level playing fields have been played
The impact on football could be epic
This corrupt balloon of gold must deflate
Blatter must be scythed with a sharp grass blade
The seized computers may reveal a slick
Of oil on the pitch that should seal some fates
Dawn raids on senior FIFA potentates
At a prestigious hotel by the lake
With possible fallout affecting states
Who may have won the World Cup-hosting race
Let's hope the US legal team, allied
With the Swiss, on whose soil these things took place
Will not at all be influenced or afraid
How long since level playing fields have been played
The impact on football could be epic
This corrupt balloon of gold must deflate
Blatter must be scythed with a sharp grass blade
The seized computers may reveal a slick
Of oil on the pitch that should seal some fates
Tuesday 26 May 2015
3204 - Shat out of hell
A varied day, took it off work to go
To a driving awareness course up in
Bury, a four hour workshop that had no
Possibility of being late - a fine
Is what you get - and points - for arriving
Late, or for a no-show, or no ID
This harsh enforcement had me worrying
So much, albeit just subconsciously
That I woke from a nightmare, eight thirty
In which I couldn't pack in time, too slow
And couldn't find passport, before heading
To the airport for a flight home. Legacy
Of recent flights to / from Europe also...
Then - ska-tological comedian
To a driving awareness course up in
Bury, a four hour workshop that had no
Possibility of being late - a fine
Is what you get - and points - for arriving
Late, or for a no-show, or no ID
This harsh enforcement had me worrying
So much, albeit just subconsciously
That I woke from a nightmare, eight thirty
In which I couldn't pack in time, too slow
And couldn't find passport, before heading
To the airport for a flight home. Legacy
Of recent flights to / from Europe also...
Then - ska-tological comedian
Monday 25 May 2015
3203 - Driving Miss Crazy
I've enjoyed my Bank Holiday Monday
Stayed home and did all sorts of things, relaxed
Tomorrow is another off-work day
My driving awareness course that I asked
To attend to avoid points. Harms your track
Record to have speeding points on licence
So I'll have a haircut, head for the trams
To Bury, all the while I will rehearse
My comedy sets for Tuesday and Wednes-
day (King's Arms and Tiger Lounge), though must say
I need to rehearse right now, practice fast
Or I won't see through my sunglasses lens
When I wear shades and hat to look OK
Trying to hide my thin and greying locks
Stayed home and did all sorts of things, relaxed
Tomorrow is another off-work day
My driving awareness course that I asked
To attend to avoid points. Harms your track
Record to have speeding points on licence
So I'll have a haircut, head for the trams
To Bury, all the while I will rehearse
My comedy sets for Tuesday and Wednes-
day (King's Arms and Tiger Lounge), though must say
I need to rehearse right now, practice fast
Or I won't see through my sunglasses lens
When I wear shades and hat to look OK
Trying to hide my thin and greying locks
Sunday 24 May 2015
3202 - Footy and tea
The daylight's dying, but there'll be no rage
I'm not Dylan Thomas, not meant to be
I'm glad about that, cos he was quite large
And also Welsh. Just joking, obviously
I like the Welsh accent, and musically
There's lots of stars from there who make good sound
Today I made notes to my holiday
Pix, now I won't forget where I was bound
Or what that statue was, or that high ground
That took about three hours, then ate, then watched
The last day of the Premier League, only
Me, no shared comments, Louis' not around
These days. Met Nance for an update engage-
ment over tea, Northern Quarter trendy
I'm not Dylan Thomas, not meant to be
I'm glad about that, cos he was quite large
And also Welsh. Just joking, obviously
I like the Welsh accent, and musically
There's lots of stars from there who make good sound
Today I made notes to my holiday
Pix, now I won't forget where I was bound
Or what that statue was, or that high ground
That took about three hours, then ate, then watched
The last day of the Premier League, only
Me, no shared comments, Louis' not around
These days. Met Nance for an update engage-
ment over tea, Northern Quarter trendy
Saturday 23 May 2015
3201 - The Pound of Music
My feet ache, as they did regularly
On my recent European holiday
The Eurovision Song Contest's on, they
Are about to vote. Really hope that they
Show some shots of Vienna, where I strayed
Just over a week ago! A great place
So many elegant streets, and much I'd
Like to have seen but didn't have time. Grace
And monumentality, grandeur, space
No, they're going to have an Austrian spree
But in song on stage. Oh well. It's OK
If I want Austrian images, could face
For first time ever, perhaps, just maybe
Watch 'The Sound of Music'! Could be worse, eh?
On my recent European holiday
The Eurovision Song Contest's on, they
Are about to vote. Really hope that they
Show some shots of Vienna, where I strayed
Just over a week ago! A great place
So many elegant streets, and much I'd
Like to have seen but didn't have time. Grace
And monumentality, grandeur, space
No, they're going to have an Austrian spree
But in song on stage. Oh well. It's OK
If I want Austrian images, could face
For first time ever, perhaps, just maybe
Watch 'The Sound of Music'! Could be worse, eh?
3200 - People come and go
Late night sonnet writing ain't so easy
Especially if you're a little worse for
Wear, as is obvious to people free
Of prior association before
They know me or you and so then therefore
They judge but unfairly, knowing nothing
I had to do stuff at work that was poor
No back-up, from absent managers, things
Were sorted. After that, Tracey's leaving
Do and plenty of drink was drunk, you see
Now I'm back home, and things don't seem so sore
Indeed, I'm celebrating, enjoying
Just being here, safe and sound, and simply
Seeing it through, relaxing like of yore
Fri 22 May
Especially if you're a little worse for
Wear, as is obvious to people free
Of prior association before
They know me or you and so then therefore
They judge but unfairly, knowing nothing
I had to do stuff at work that was poor
No back-up, from absent managers, things
Were sorted. After that, Tracey's leaving
Do and plenty of drink was drunk, you see
Now I'm back home, and things don't seem so sore
Indeed, I'm celebrating, enjoying
Just being here, safe and sound, and simply
Seeing it through, relaxing like of yore
Fri 22 May
Thursday 21 May 2015
3199 - New war
Oh my goodness, life is well, just a ride
And each day is precious, like to think I
See it as pleasure, not a chore, not snide
To other people, not two-faced, but try
To give and receive pleasure, that's the high
Point and message, nothing else is as good
Don't need a religion to justify
My intention of global brotherhood
In fact, religion divides, tribal blood
Is shed endlessly as they always did
The difference in recent decades was why
The west thought it ruled the roost, but it should
No longer think that, can no more decide
Alone thanks to its cheap technology
And each day is precious, like to think I
See it as pleasure, not a chore, not snide
To other people, not two-faced, but try
To give and receive pleasure, that's the high
Point and message, nothing else is as good
Don't need a religion to justify
My intention of global brotherhood
In fact, religion divides, tribal blood
Is shed endlessly as they always did
The difference in recent decades was why
The west thought it ruled the roost, but it should
No longer think that, can no more decide
Alone thanks to its cheap technology
Wednesday 20 May 2015
3198 - That will be the week, that will
Just written four songs with funny lyrics
Replacing the conventional old words
A set I hope to do twice in next week's
Comedy slots - it may not win awards
It should, but we don't get our just deserts
However, enemies just make us strong
In order to survive their gunfire bursts
Like superheroes, we just can't be flung
Like superheroes, we can do no wrong
Our confidence can overcome their tricks
Our righteousness overcomes their absurd
And when the time comes to unleash our tongue
We'll spit them into space with verbal licks
They'll return to earth broken, sheathe their swords
Replacing the conventional old words
A set I hope to do twice in next week's
Comedy slots - it may not win awards
It should, but we don't get our just deserts
However, enemies just make us strong
In order to survive their gunfire bursts
Like superheroes, we just can't be flung
Like superheroes, we can do no wrong
Our confidence can overcome their tricks
Our righteousness overcomes their absurd
And when the time comes to unleash our tongue
We'll spit them into space with verbal licks
They'll return to earth broken, sheathe their swords
Tuesday 19 May 2015
3197 - Rug flats
Popped round after work to see V and P
Forgot to take V's big wheel fridge magnet
From Vienna, how forgetful of me
It's so hard remembering not to forget
At their place I picked up a rug, carpet
Isn't that common in my flat, which means
I don't need a vacuum cleaner in it
As brushing's enough to keep the floor clean
But this rug means I can no more be seen
With no hoover in the flat. It might be
Let to tenants soon, if I do a flit
Down to London, prove I'm not a has-been
(That's if I ever was), but nice to be
In bed reading. How could I get upset?
Forgot to take V's big wheel fridge magnet
From Vienna, how forgetful of me
It's so hard remembering not to forget
At their place I picked up a rug, carpet
Isn't that common in my flat, which means
I don't need a vacuum cleaner in it
As brushing's enough to keep the floor clean
But this rug means I can no more be seen
With no hoover in the flat. It might be
Let to tenants soon, if I do a flit
Down to London, prove I'm not a has-been
(That's if I ever was), but nice to be
In bed reading. How could I get upset?
Monday 18 May 2015
3196 - Seasons in the sun (and wind)
Soon after work, and eating of my tea
I quickly set to continuing to save
My many holiday pictures, finally
Downloading them all onto my hard drive
Now quickly writing this so I can have
A play on my guitar 'fore relaxing
It's nearly nine, and the sun's still above
The horizon, as we're in the late spring
Mid-May, when nature seems so welcoming
A nice time of year, though it's cold lately
To go out with no jacket would be brave
Although we're almost in June. I'm saving
Money for a while, think I'll boycott the
Concerts and days out I'd planned, but that's tough
I quickly set to continuing to save
My many holiday pictures, finally
Downloading them all onto my hard drive
Now quickly writing this so I can have
A play on my guitar 'fore relaxing
It's nearly nine, and the sun's still above
The horizon, as we're in the late spring
Mid-May, when nature seems so welcoming
A nice time of year, though it's cold lately
To go out with no jacket would be brave
Although we're almost in June. I'm saving
Money for a while, think I'll boycott the
Concerts and days out I'd planned, but that's tough
Sunday 17 May 2015
3195 - That was the two weeks, that was
So many holiday pictures I took
Been posting them today, it took all day
First, posting them from phone onto Facebook
Replying to comments was fun, I'd say
But now I'm numbering them, not yet half-way
Through that process, and saving to hard drive
Good to relive it all, though, all that way
I travelled, walked like you wouldn't believe
It's reminded me all those things I strove
To pack into each day, people will look
At those pix and wonder, and some may say
'I want to go there,' and some may just grieve
That they can't, but despite their sad bad luck
I hope they liked seeing my holiday!
Been posting them today, it took all day
First, posting them from phone onto Facebook
Replying to comments was fun, I'd say
But now I'm numbering them, not yet half-way
Through that process, and saving to hard drive
Good to relive it all, though, all that way
I travelled, walked like you wouldn't believe
It's reminded me all those things I strove
To pack into each day, people will look
At those pix and wonder, and some may say
'I want to go there,' and some may just grieve
That they can't, but despite their sad bad luck
I hope they liked seeing my holiday!
3194 - Where it's at
And now today, had a good time with Jo
Not seen her for two weeks, she is the best
Her Mum's done her back in, but she will go
Back to normality after a rest
Meanwhile, I think London is the real test
If I can make it there I can make it
Anywhere, dreams maybe, but it is blessed
With movers and shakers, more than this shit-
Hole of northern-ness, where there's no real wit
A sideways job move would let me there grow
Without real poverty constraining, let's
Give it a try, get my act ready, flit
From trying to impress no marks, a flow
A trajectory leading to success...
Sat 16 May
Not seen her for two weeks, she is the best
Her Mum's done her back in, but she will go
Back to normality after a rest
Meanwhile, I think London is the real test
If I can make it there I can make it
Anywhere, dreams maybe, but it is blessed
With movers and shakers, more than this shit-
Hole of northern-ness, where there's no real wit
A sideways job move would let me there grow
Without real poverty constraining, let's
Give it a try, get my act ready, flit
From trying to impress no marks, a flow
A trajectory leading to success...
Sat 16 May
3193 - The gallant South
I'm gonna make this quick, I'm a day late
With this sonnet, I forgot to do it
Yesterday, what with work and getting straight
After my travels. So, remember it
I was told at work once again I'm shit
But I have potential. Come on, are you
Any better than me, no, so please quit
Feeding me this bullshit. Realised my true
Home might be London, that's the place where you
Are seen and recognised, and that's where fate
May await me, plus I love that great zit
On the face of the British landscape, grew
To unimaginable proportions, great
Place of destiny, maybe there I'll flit...
Fri 15 May
With this sonnet, I forgot to do it
Yesterday, what with work and getting straight
After my travels. So, remember it
I was told at work once again I'm shit
But I have potential. Come on, are you
Any better than me, no, so please quit
Feeding me this bullshit. Realised my true
Home might be London, that's the place where you
Are seen and recognised, and that's where fate
May await me, plus I love that great zit
On the face of the British landscape, grew
To unimaginable proportions, great
Place of destiny, maybe there I'll flit...
Fri 15 May
Thursday 14 May 2015
3192 - Back in the UKUK
So here I am back home, but honestly
I couldn't afford to be away more
I was shocked at my bank account money
Though I shouldn't be. First there was the floor
Of my flat last month, done by the builder
And after that I went on my travels
Specifically, a European tour
To Czech Republic, German towns and hills
And Austria, where I heard no yodels
I'm still in Europe in my head. You see
All these great buildings and Germanic lore
In museums and all around. It fills
Your head, immersed in sights and history
But you don't want to travel forever
I couldn't afford to be away more
I was shocked at my bank account money
Though I shouldn't be. First there was the floor
Of my flat last month, done by the builder
And after that I went on my travels
Specifically, a European tour
To Czech Republic, German towns and hills
And Austria, where I heard no yodels
I'm still in Europe in my head. You see
All these great buildings and Germanic lore
In museums and all around. It fills
Your head, immersed in sights and history
But you don't want to travel forever
3191 - Not very Prague-matic
Why did I choose to end my tour in Prague
(Where I began?) What a dumb decision
Should have flown home from Vienna. A drag
This last day, waiting near the bus station
For a four hour bus to Prague, no reason
To do this, I realise now, all too late
A waste of time and money, but it's done
At least all my travelling has turned out neat
Let's hope this applies to today - that's great
A successful and varied trip. I dug
Everywhere I went, though Munich was one
Big disappointment how few friends I made...
Last night in Vienna, a good chinwag
With a few people. Last day there was fun!
Wed 13 May
(Where I began?) What a dumb decision
Should have flown home from Vienna. A drag
This last day, waiting near the bus station
For a four hour bus to Prague, no reason
To do this, I realise now, all too late
A waste of time and money, but it's done
At least all my travelling has turned out neat
Let's hope this applies to today - that's great
A successful and varied trip. I dug
Everywhere I went, though Munich was one
Big disappointment how few friends I made...
Last night in Vienna, a good chinwag
With a few people. Last day there was fun!
Wed 13 May
3190 - Fancy Danube
My last full day, and due to tiredness
Of feet from yesterday, travelled about
Extensively by U-bahn. First stop was
The bus station, to buy a bus ticket
To Prague for 20 euros - no repeat
Of my last journey which cost 50... Yikes!
A very hot day, so tried to keep out
Of the sun. Next stop, seeing as I liked
Vienna's vast streets and buildings, unlike
Anywhere else, the architecture place
In the Museums Quarter. In the heat
I checked out Schonbrunn Palace, but I hiked
Away immediately, preferred quietness
Of the Danube, north of the tourists' shouts
Tue 12 May
Of feet from yesterday, travelled about
Extensively by U-bahn. First stop was
The bus station, to buy a bus ticket
To Prague for 20 euros - no repeat
Of my last journey which cost 50... Yikes!
A very hot day, so tried to keep out
Of the sun. Next stop, seeing as I liked
Vienna's vast streets and buildings, unlike
Anywhere else, the architecture place
In the Museums Quarter. In the heat
I checked out Schonbrunn Palace, but I hiked
Away immediately, preferred quietness
Of the Danube, north of the tourists' shouts
Tue 12 May
3189 - Lost in Austria
I've walked further in one day than ever
Before - at least that's how it feels right now
My feet ache so much and I need a shower
I had one this morning, but need somehow
To clean every part again, yes I do
I paid a huge amount to Austrian trains
(Should've got the bus) from Salzburg and to
Vienna. Took some time to check me in
At the hostel, so didn't start walking
Round Viennese sights til half-two. But the
Day's been marvellously sunny, and allowed
Me to walk almost everywhere within
The tourist area of old Vienna
Amazing buildings. Nineteenth century wow!
Mon 11 May
Before - at least that's how it feels right now
My feet ache so much and I need a shower
I had one this morning, but need somehow
To clean every part again, yes I do
I paid a huge amount to Austrian trains
(Should've got the bus) from Salzburg and to
Vienna. Took some time to check me in
At the hostel, so didn't start walking
Round Viennese sights til half-two. But the
Day's been marvellously sunny, and allowed
Me to walk almost everywhere within
The tourist area of old Vienna
Amazing buildings. Nineteenth century wow!
Mon 11 May
3188 - No trouble brewing
What to do, my second day in Salzburg?
I hadn't a clue, Hellbrunn Palace was
The favourite, someone had been there who dug
It, but Vienna has got palaces
That are better. Looked at maps, references
To Stiegl Brewery tours where you can learn
About the brewing process - thought this is
A better way to spend the day. It turned
Out it was a free event. Austrian
Families were there in droves, wore clothes so snug
Trousers above the knee, flouncy dresses
Brass bands, huge amounts of beer, and mountains
In the background. Climbed Kapuzinerberg
Afterwards, then bought six-pack Stiegl beers
Sun 10 May
I hadn't a clue, Hellbrunn Palace was
The favourite, someone had been there who dug
It, but Vienna has got palaces
That are better. Looked at maps, references
To Stiegl Brewery tours where you can learn
About the brewing process - thought this is
A better way to spend the day. It turned
Out it was a free event. Austrian
Families were there in droves, wore clothes so snug
Trousers above the knee, flouncy dresses
Brass bands, huge amounts of beer, and mountains
In the background. Climbed Kapuzinerberg
Afterwards, then bought six-pack Stiegl beers
Sun 10 May
3187 - This is where I got that hat
Woke quite early and caught bus to Salzburg
At last I'm in Austria properly
Looked at a map, saw things to take a look
At, and noticed a guided tour. Quickly
Walked down to Mozart Square in time for the
Usual pseudo-historical affair
It was quite boring but necessary
However, after wondering what else there
Could possibly be to do, the sun's fair
Rays started shining. My unguided walk
Was most enjoyable, up in the trees
Above town, on the big rock. Market wares
Attracted my attention, and I splurged
Lots on an Austrian hat (for comedy!)
Sat 9 May
At last I'm in Austria properly
Looked at a map, saw things to take a look
At, and noticed a guided tour. Quickly
Walked down to Mozart Square in time for the
Usual pseudo-historical affair
It was quite boring but necessary
However, after wondering what else there
Could possibly be to do, the sun's fair
Rays started shining. My unguided walk
Was most enjoyable, up in the trees
Above town, on the big rock. Market wares
Attracted my attention, and I splurged
Lots on an Austrian hat (for comedy!)
Sat 9 May
3186 - Lake Dischtricht
My good luck on this holiday has held
Berchtesgaden's an outdoor kind of place
The sun shone til 4:30, so we sailed
(Me and a guy called Jet) on this high lake
Called Konigsee (King's Lake) and saw the face
Of Mt Watzmann, the second highest peak
In Germany. At the far side, amazed
At the beauty of Obersee, and walked
Alongside it and beyond, trying to seek
A route up the steep hill to waterfall
Was successful. Next, because of footache
No more long walks, but cable-car technique
Took us up Mt Jenner, where we beheld
Great views of lake and Berchtesgaden. Ace!
Fri 8 May
Berchtesgaden's an outdoor kind of place
The sun shone til 4:30, so we sailed
(Me and a guy called Jet) on this high lake
Called Konigsee (King's Lake) and saw the face
Of Mt Watzmann, the second highest peak
In Germany. At the far side, amazed
At the beauty of Obersee, and walked
Alongside it and beyond, trying to seek
A route up the steep hill to waterfall
Was successful. Next, because of footache
No more long walks, but cable-car technique
Took us up Mt Jenner, where we beheld
Great views of lake and Berchtesgaden. Ace!
Fri 8 May
3185 - Burgers and beer gardens in Berchtesgaden
The journey went well, finally left Munich
By bus to Salzburg, then back to Deutschland
Immediately by train, to Burger King
Hostel in Berchtesgaden, afternoon
'Bout half-past one, the sun was shining down
Made enquiries at the tourist office
And also found a Lidl store, and found
An amazingly cheap beer store with its
Prices of good bottled beer, only cents
Each (less than one euro), and so I picked
Up five of these local beers for the grand
Sum of only six euros - under six
Actually! Heaven! Met Jet, went walking
Round Berchtesgaden. Now bedtime's at hand...
Thur 7 May
By bus to Salzburg, then back to Deutschland
Immediately by train, to Burger King
Hostel in Berchtesgaden, afternoon
'Bout half-past one, the sun was shining down
Made enquiries at the tourist office
And also found a Lidl store, and found
An amazingly cheap beer store with its
Prices of good bottled beer, only cents
Each (less than one euro), and so I picked
Up five of these local beers for the grand
Sum of only six euros - under six
Actually! Heaven! Met Jet, went walking
Round Berchtesgaden. Now bedtime's at hand...
Thur 7 May
3184 - A father, who art in Munich
This is my last full day in Munich and
It was very similar to yesterday
But reversed in order. First, art. Began
With a visit to the Alte Pinakothek
You just gotta love a Flemish master
Or fifty. Plus Rubens, Rembrandt, works not
As well-known to me simply because they're
Not housed in London. After I came out
Of there, the sky cleared, and I had a good
Walk round the 'English Garden' which was grand
Except that I just kept losing my way
Never did find the Chinese Tower! I fought
My way out of that maze to watch Bayern
Get hammered 3-0 by Barca today
Wed 6 May
It was very similar to yesterday
But reversed in order. First, art. Began
With a visit to the Alte Pinakothek
You just gotta love a Flemish master
Or fifty. Plus Rubens, Rembrandt, works not
As well-known to me simply because they're
Not housed in London. After I came out
Of there, the sky cleared, and I had a good
Walk round the 'English Garden' which was grand
Except that I just kept losing my way
Never did find the Chinese Tower! I fought
My way out of that maze to watch Bayern
Get hammered 3-0 by Barca today
Wed 6 May
3183 - Munching in Munchen (at last)
A hot day, did not need to take my coat
Got the U-bahn to the Olympic zone
Really liked the stadium and how it's set
In a park with great views of tower and town
If you climb the hill built on things knocked down
And turned to rubble by British bombing
In the war, then they let grass grow upon
It all, and hey - some nice hills! Tasting
Currywurst for the first time. Interesting
But too much tomato. Then, welcome seat
On the tube to Allianz Arena, home
To Bayern Munich football team. Going
Back to the centre. New museum's got
Lots of info on Nazi Munich. Boom!
Tue 5 May
Got the U-bahn to the Olympic zone
Really liked the stadium and how it's set
In a park with great views of tower and town
If you climb the hill built on things knocked down
And turned to rubble by British bombing
In the war, then they let grass grow upon
It all, and hey - some nice hills! Tasting
Currywurst for the first time. Interesting
But too much tomato. Then, welcome seat
On the tube to Allianz Arena, home
To Bayern Munich football team. Going
Back to the centre. New museum's got
Lots of info on Nazi Munich. Boom!
Tue 5 May
3182 - No munching in Munchen
I'll write this now, while I'm here just waiting
For Minji Kim to message, so I know
Where to meet, although I have an inkling
She said Odeonsplatz, but that's lacking
In detail. I've just been there - it's quite big
Which cafe are they in? And they're eating
While I'm starving, but maybe I could go
Without food, just drink beer, from stein I'll swig
And if need be, a takeaway to dig
At the hunger if it comes later. So...
Spoke to a nice Romanian nurse sitting
On the train to Munich. Once here, I go
Straight into a 'Third Reich tour' - fun seeing
Inside the Hofbrauhaus. More beer halls now?
Mon 4 May
For Minji Kim to message, so I know
Where to meet, although I have an inkling
She said Odeonsplatz, but that's lacking
In detail. I've just been there - it's quite big
Which cafe are they in? And they're eating
While I'm starving, but maybe I could go
Without food, just drink beer, from stein I'll swig
And if need be, a takeaway to dig
At the hunger if it comes later. So...
Spoke to a nice Romanian nurse sitting
On the train to Munich. Once here, I go
Straight into a 'Third Reich tour' - fun seeing
Inside the Hofbrauhaus. More beer halls now?
Mon 4 May
Sunday 3 May 2015
3181 - News from Nuremberg
I woke at 12, slept well and recovered
From last night's drinks with Julius. The weather
Is rainy today, so I decided
To look round the National Museum here
I saw most of its many rooms, took four
Hours, beginning with a guided tour that
Focused on certain objects, how monks were
Living there, never speaking. But she said
They found buried females too - funny, that
Maybe it wasn't so terribly bad!
I'm typing this in Five Reasons - that's the
Name of this Nuremberg hostel I'm at
It's getting dark, and I still need some food
Think I'll walk outside, find a cheap supper...
3180 - Not such a blue night after all!
I'm writing this on Sunday, I'm afraid
But that is because of last night's night out
In Nuremberg with Julius - went on late
He was supposed to go at ten, did not
And in the end missed his train, stuck about
The station all night, I suppose - oh dear
He seemed to lose his bearings easily
At least I found the station. Drank some beer -
Much beer, even - thank God I didn't steer
In the direction of Bamberg! (He'd said
Let's meet there!) After dark, buildings were lit
In blue light, but missed it all. Did see a
Flaming sculpture, though. I slept well, delayed
Getting up til 12. Missed breakfast, no doubt!
Sat 2 May
But that is because of last night's night out
In Nuremberg with Julius - went on late
He was supposed to go at ten, did not
And in the end missed his train, stuck about
The station all night, I suppose - oh dear
He seemed to lose his bearings easily
At least I found the station. Drank some beer -
Much beer, even - thank God I didn't steer
In the direction of Bamberg! (He'd said
Let's meet there!) After dark, buildings were lit
In blue light, but missed it all. Did see a
Flaming sculpture, though. I slept well, delayed
Getting up til 12. Missed breakfast, no doubt!
Sat 2 May
3179 - Don't Argue with Prague!
Lucky I wrote last night's sonnet before
A marathon drinking session outside
The hostel, sitting in the cold night air
For hour after hour. Think we must have stayed
Out there til 5.30. The light had made
The bedroom bright when I closed the curtain
But after a quiet start, the evening played
Its part in a great day, had so much fun
Listening to Jan do his Cockney accent
I shook with laughter, that I can assure
Today, on four hour's sleep, I climbed the height
Up to the castle, crossed the Vltava
By two bridges. Could do with rest for sure
But may not get it before drinks are plied
Fri 1 May
A marathon drinking session outside
The hostel, sitting in the cold night air
For hour after hour. Think we must have stayed
Out there til 5.30. The light had made
The bedroom bright when I closed the curtain
But after a quiet start, the evening played
Its part in a great day, had so much fun
Listening to Jan do his Cockney accent
I shook with laughter, that I can assure
Today, on four hour's sleep, I climbed the height
Up to the castle, crossed the Vltava
By two bridges. Could do with rest for sure
But may not get it before drinks are plied
Fri 1 May
3178 - Eastern bloc blog 'bout Prague
First full day in Prague, first full day's always
Exciting, getting used to a new land
Getting to know the buses and tramways
Two tours I've done, helped me to understand
The layout of old Prague, and then beyond
(On the 'alternative tour'). Saw street art
Saw galleries (from the outside!) and learned
About 3D printers and bitcoins, part
Of the changing world, try to take to heart
Nika was the morning guide, a nice face
From Ljubljana. Tomas was the 'art man'
In the afternoon, at Cross Club, then part
At Florenc station, bus back to my stay
At Elf Hostel. Most of it's gone as planned!
Thur 30 April
Exciting, getting used to a new land
Getting to know the buses and tramways
Two tours I've done, helped me to understand
The layout of old Prague, and then beyond
(On the 'alternative tour'). Saw street art
Saw galleries (from the outside!) and learned
About 3D printers and bitcoins, part
Of the changing world, try to take to heart
Nika was the morning guide, a nice face
From Ljubljana. Tomas was the 'art man'
In the afternoon, at Cross Club, then part
At Florenc station, bus back to my stay
At Elf Hostel. Most of it's gone as planned!
Thur 30 April
3177 - I'm not being vague - I'm in Prague
I'm safely at the Hostel Elf in Prague
Got here with no problems, got travel card
For all three days here, I'm already org-
anised for tomorrow, free tour with guide
Get to know the main sites. I can't afford
The segway tour, but bike hire's possible...
Of the Czech language I can't speak a word
But the hostel guys speak English quite well
As I'm sure many folk will do. Travel
Is easy for an English speaker, tongue
That's spoken everywhere, you're never barred
From being understood. If affable
Then you can have a good chat, get the bug
Once more for unknown pleasures, not be bored
Wed 29 April
Got here with no problems, got travel card
For all three days here, I'm already org-
anised for tomorrow, free tour with guide
Get to know the main sites. I can't afford
The segway tour, but bike hire's possible...
Of the Czech language I can't speak a word
But the hostel guys speak English quite well
As I'm sure many folk will do. Travel
Is easy for an English speaker, tongue
That's spoken everywhere, you're never barred
From being understood. If affable
Then you can have a good chat, get the bug
Once more for unknown pleasures, not be bored
Wed 29 April
Wednesday 29 April 2015
3176 - Bohemian Crapsody part two
The final night in England for a while
Was The Worst Comedy Night in Salford
Dave Turquoise, the MC, his usual style
Me, I didn't have time to learn my words
But did 'Shake, Rattle and Ebola' hard
And relentless, followed by ,Bohemian
Crapsody', appropriate since I'm headed
Tomorrow to Bohemia - Prague's the one
Town you've all heard of there, I'll be ensconced
There tomorrow night, pints upon pints piled
Or maybe not, we'll see. Put to the sword
Will be work for almost two weeks, that's fun
In itself, Hope my suitcase's viable
Last time it almost fell apart at airport!
Tue 28 April
Was The Worst Comedy Night in Salford
Dave Turquoise, the MC, his usual style
Me, I didn't have time to learn my words
But did 'Shake, Rattle and Ebola' hard
And relentless, followed by ,Bohemian
Crapsody', appropriate since I'm headed
Tomorrow to Bohemia - Prague's the one
Town you've all heard of there, I'll be ensconced
There tomorrow night, pints upon pints piled
Or maybe not, we'll see. Put to the sword
Will be work for almost two weeks, that's fun
In itself, Hope my suitcase's viable
Last time it almost fell apart at airport!
Tue 28 April
Monday 27 April 2015
3175 - Get ready, here I come
I got my phone problems fixed, all's ready
Now for my trip on Wednesday, feeling good
Not rehearsed though for Tuesday's comedy
That'll have to wait til after work, could
Do an hour or two tomorrow, that should
Be enough for stuff I've done once before
Bohemian Crapsody's been requested
Need to practice or be crap on the floor
Of the King's Arms, which can strangle the poor
In wit, I must admit, so let Tony
Have time to learn his guitar chucklehood
You can't be good straight away, that's the law
I'm getting tired now but I feel happy
I'll have milk and chocolate, then hit my bed
Now for my trip on Wednesday, feeling good
Not rehearsed though for Tuesday's comedy
That'll have to wait til after work, could
Do an hour or two tomorrow, that should
Be enough for stuff I've done once before
Bohemian Crapsody's been requested
Need to practice or be crap on the floor
Of the King's Arms, which can strangle the poor
In wit, I must admit, so let Tony
Have time to learn his guitar chucklehood
You can't be good straight away, that's the law
I'm getting tired now but I feel happy
I'll have milk and chocolate, then hit my bed
Sunday 26 April 2015
3174 - Phoney baloney
Phone trouble on the eve of holidays
This is bad timing, the camera is broke
Can't connect to Facebook or read emails
If I don't get this sorted, travel's fucked
And holiday snaps will go up in smoke
Not sure what to do, guess I'll have to talk
Tomorrow lunchtime to O2 shop guys
Or maybe the Samsung repair shop, walk
In there for the third time before goodbyes
To the UK? But time is short, it flies
Before I fly spray-on tan orangeways
That's EasyJet to you and me, a look
Out of the window at the clouds always
Cheers me on my way, this time it's to Prague!
This is bad timing, the camera is broke
Can't connect to Facebook or read emails
If I don't get this sorted, travel's fucked
And holiday snaps will go up in smoke
Not sure what to do, guess I'll have to talk
Tomorrow lunchtime to O2 shop guys
Or maybe the Samsung repair shop, walk
In there for the third time before goodbyes
To the UK? But time is short, it flies
Before I fly spray-on tan orangeways
That's EasyJet to you and me, a look
Out of the window at the clouds always
Cheers me on my way, this time it's to Prague!
Saturday 25 April 2015
3173 - United in Munich
Am enjoying my evening, had good day
With Josie in Arndale and Old Trafford
A bit of rain but mainly stayed away
And quite warm sunshine meant that it felt good
Strangely when we got to Old T Jo did
Not want to look round the club shop this time
So with the Jappy snappers, stood outside
Then wandered off to Lowry mall, a fine
Mocha in Costa til six, then soon flyin'
Home by tram and train. Now my holiday
Is looking even better, yes I've scored
A hit tonight, I'm meeting Minji Kim
In Munich. For timing that good I'd pray
But no need, it's gonna happen, by God!
With Josie in Arndale and Old Trafford
A bit of rain but mainly stayed away
And quite warm sunshine meant that it felt good
Strangely when we got to Old T Jo did
Not want to look round the club shop this time
So with the Jappy snappers, stood outside
Then wandered off to Lowry mall, a fine
Mocha in Costa til six, then soon flyin'
Home by tram and train. Now my holiday
Is looking even better, yes I've scored
A hit tonight, I'm meeting Minji Kim
In Munich. For timing that good I'd pray
But no need, it's gonna happen, by God!
Friday 24 April 2015
3172 - The Greek Sheikh
Good evening, just got back from a big meal
At Dimitri's in Manchester, a Greek
Restaurant that has served us up a real
Great slap-up occasion, though it was steep
Thirty-four quid per head, could make you weep
But with some wine (or beer) down your neck, who
Cares anyway? Soon there'll be time for sleep
Now I must digest all that grub and try to
Get a bit more drunk cos it's Friday you
Know. Drinking makes everything somehow feel
Okay for a while. At least I'm not deep
In debt (yet). Well I am if I think too
Hard about it, with this mortgage to deal
With. I need money, not much as a sheikh
At Dimitri's in Manchester, a Greek
Restaurant that has served us up a real
Great slap-up occasion, though it was steep
Thirty-four quid per head, could make you weep
But with some wine (or beer) down your neck, who
Cares anyway? Soon there'll be time for sleep
Now I must digest all that grub and try to
Get a bit more drunk cos it's Friday you
Know. Drinking makes everything somehow feel
Okay for a while. At least I'm not deep
In debt (yet). Well I am if I think too
Hard about it, with this mortgage to deal
With. I need money, not much as a sheikh
Thursday 23 April 2015
3171 - Prague pilgrim's progress
Getting in the holiday zone of mind
Excitement builds. Today, getting my phone
Mended so I can charge it and still find
Power to post on Twitter. Having flown
To Prague, I'll want and need to have well shown
The sights I see, the folk I meet, also
In German places, beer and mountains grown
To gross proportions, only goats may go
To those high heights! My German learning's slow
I'm struggling to study the lingo, kind
Of lazy maybe, but distraction's blown
It away, along with 'Dragon Tattoo'
(The book), but I could catch up when flyin'
Or waitin' in stations for trains to come
Excitement builds. Today, getting my phone
Mended so I can charge it and still find
Power to post on Twitter. Having flown
To Prague, I'll want and need to have well shown
The sights I see, the folk I meet, also
In German places, beer and mountains grown
To gross proportions, only goats may go
To those high heights! My German learning's slow
I'm struggling to study the lingo, kind
Of lazy maybe, but distraction's blown
It away, along with 'Dragon Tattoo'
(The book), but I could catch up when flyin'
Or waitin' in stations for trains to come
Wednesday 22 April 2015
3170 - Til I fly
I could go to Tiger Lounge comedy
Night, but probably won't, though it is nice
Out there. I need to eat, and energy
Is rather low. Went to the Post Office
After work to collect my Czech moneys
Not long to go now til I fly to Prague
The Czech Republic - one of the countries
I'll tick off as part of my travelogue
And Austria (Vienna and Salzburg)
Sorting out my credit card's next for me
Using it abroad to buy, there's no fees
I also need to ring the police to book
A speed awareness driving course, quickly
Before I go, or they will penalise
Night, but probably won't, though it is nice
Out there. I need to eat, and energy
Is rather low. Went to the Post Office
After work to collect my Czech moneys
Not long to go now til I fly to Prague
The Czech Republic - one of the countries
I'll tick off as part of my travelogue
And Austria (Vienna and Salzburg)
Sorting out my credit card's next for me
Using it abroad to buy, there's no fees
I also need to ring the police to book
A speed awareness driving course, quickly
Before I go, or they will penalise
Tuesday 21 April 2015
3169 - Rock around the clock
A lovely sunny day and lovely lunch
At the new Dockyard just over the bridge
It's a good place when it comes to the crunch
It's better than anything in the fridge
But of course you can't always have that binge
Most days you have to cut your cloth and save
Just now and then you can see to that itch
But most times you must make yourself behave
And act sensibly and try to be brave
Since then I've had a good evening of grunge
Playing guitar, I've improved just a smidge
As we do each time we try to improve
There's no secret, you just find time to punch
The clock at the place where you feel most rich
At the new Dockyard just over the bridge
It's a good place when it comes to the crunch
It's better than anything in the fridge
But of course you can't always have that binge
Most days you have to cut your cloth and save
Just now and then you can see to that itch
But most times you must make yourself behave
And act sensibly and try to be brave
Since then I've had a good evening of grunge
Playing guitar, I've improved just a smidge
As we do each time we try to improve
There's no secret, you just find time to punch
The clock at the place where you feel most rich
3168 - Beer giggles
The gig went OK, some audience looked tired
I don't blame them after some of those acts
Some boring readers meant the fun retired
And when I went on, atmosphere was flat
But Pearl came and she said there were some laughs
She also appreciated my cover
Of Nina Simone, but with changed lyrics
Difficult stuff but I put it over
And that gives me confidence for future
My rehearsals paid off. Easy to read
Stuff from a page, easy even with gags
But harder without a piece of paper
I have admired performers who have tried
To memorise their stuff, and they get claps
Mon 20 April
I don't blame them after some of those acts
Some boring readers meant the fun retired
And when I went on, atmosphere was flat
But Pearl came and she said there were some laughs
She also appreciated my cover
Of Nina Simone, but with changed lyrics
Difficult stuff but I put it over
And that gives me confidence for future
My rehearsals paid off. Easy to read
Stuff from a page, easy even with gags
But harder without a piece of paper
I have admired performers who have tried
To memorise their stuff, and they get claps
Mon 20 April
Sunday 19 April 2015
3167 - Tomorrow night
A late night sonnet from a tired brain
I've spent hours today learning material
For tomorrow's gig. It's not going to rain
That's good news when you've got to walk a mile
Or two carrying a guitar. The Castle
Pub's the venue on Oldham Street. I've tried
To learn the gags and lyrics - have I failed?
Well I've still got time tomorrow inside
The flat after work, to run through the slide
Of fingers on fretboard, refine playing
Only run through the two songs tonight - still
More practice needed to make it more tight
The Nina Simone song, that is the main
Difficulty, both chords and lyrical!
I've spent hours today learning material
For tomorrow's gig. It's not going to rain
That's good news when you've got to walk a mile
Or two carrying a guitar. The Castle
Pub's the venue on Oldham Street. I've tried
To learn the gags and lyrics - have I failed?
Well I've still got time tomorrow inside
The flat after work, to run through the slide
Of fingers on fretboard, refine playing
Only run through the two songs tonight - still
More practice needed to make it more tight
The Nina Simone song, that is the main
Difficulty, both chords and lyrical!
Saturday 18 April 2015
3166 - Saturday sun
A lovely warm day, me and Jo were sat
In the sunshine on the railway platform
It felt like a holiday there, just that
Passing time on a bench, sat in the warm
With blue sky overhead, watching ants worm
Their way along the ground looking for things
I cut the day short so that I'll have time
To think about Monday night's act, writing
A few new gags - magic's the theme - keeping
The two comedy songs already got
So in fact it won't take long. Monday's theme
Is magic. Would be tragic though to fling
This gig away, must give it a good shot
Need two good nights' sleep, then I'll be on form
In the sunshine on the railway platform
It felt like a holiday there, just that
Passing time on a bench, sat in the warm
With blue sky overhead, watching ants worm
Their way along the ground looking for things
I cut the day short so that I'll have time
To think about Monday night's act, writing
A few new gags - magic's the theme - keeping
The two comedy songs already got
So in fact it won't take long. Monday's theme
Is magic. Would be tragic though to fling
This gig away, must give it a good shot
Need two good nights' sleep, then I'll be on form
3165 - Life is....
You might think you know what this is but I
Don't think you do, because me, I don't think
I know, don't think I do, don't care, know why
And not only don't I know, I don't think
I know, so don't think you can tell me, pink
Or red, what's the difference? It's all the same
There's no difference, it's all in the seeing
And therefore everything's part of a game
Tactics, luck, you name it, you'd go insane
If you tried to quantify, qualify
Everything, which I can't do, beginning
With the impossibility, the main
Point being that no-one knows how to apply
Themselves to life, it's just a random thing
Fri 17 April
Don't think you do, because me, I don't think
I know, don't think I do, don't care, know why
And not only don't I know, I don't think
I know, so don't think you can tell me, pink
Or red, what's the difference? It's all the same
There's no difference, it's all in the seeing
And therefore everything's part of a game
Tactics, luck, you name it, you'd go insane
If you tried to quantify, qualify
Everything, which I can't do, beginning
With the impossibility, the main
Point being that no-one knows how to apply
Themselves to life, it's just a random thing
Fri 17 April
Friday 17 April 2015
3164 - Coping
Just got back from a gig at Sound Control
In Manchester, the act was Julian Cope
He's about to go to Ireland to hole
Up and write new songs. We all hoped
He'd do some old stuff of course, but the scope
Included newer stuff which I quite liked
So I shelled out ten quid and I bought 'Trip
Advizer' - yes that's how it's spelled. He spiked
Maybe in the eighties but he's since psyched
His fans with other stuff, written a whole
Lot of books and whatnot. Quite a few popes
Have come and gone but he's still here and miked
Up for the occasion. Downstairs I told
His daughter of my travels in Europe!
Thursday 16 April
In Manchester, the act was Julian Cope
He's about to go to Ireland to hole
Up and write new songs. We all hoped
He'd do some old stuff of course, but the scope
Included newer stuff which I quite liked
So I shelled out ten quid and I bought 'Trip
Advizer' - yes that's how it's spelled. He spiked
Maybe in the eighties but he's since psyched
His fans with other stuff, written a whole
Lot of books and whatnot. Quite a few popes
Have come and gone but he's still here and miked
Up for the occasion. Downstairs I told
His daughter of my travels in Europe!
Thursday 16 April
Wednesday 15 April 2015
3163 - Strange days and nights
Too tired to think of anything at all
I thought maybe I'd even need some sleep
On the sofa at tea-time or I'd fail
To get through the evening, but no, I'm deep
Into it now, hanging by fingertips
Til a reasonable bedtime. The reason?
Went to bed at three a.m. after quips
At the King's Arms and Salford Arms again
That's bad enough when work follows the dawn
But I woke at six thirty! Nerves prevailed
Perhaps, worried that I might oversleep
And be real late for work, reputation
Suffering accordingly because of ale
And late night banter with comic people
I thought maybe I'd even need some sleep
On the sofa at tea-time or I'd fail
To get through the evening, but no, I'm deep
Into it now, hanging by fingertips
Til a reasonable bedtime. The reason?
Went to bed at three a.m. after quips
At the King's Arms and Salford Arms again
That's bad enough when work follows the dawn
But I woke at six thirty! Nerves prevailed
Perhaps, worried that I might oversleep
And be real late for work, reputation
Suffering accordingly because of ale
And late night banter with comic people
3162 - Tomorrow is here
I didn't realise it was so late
It's nearly half-past two and I have got
Work tomorrow, and time it just won't wait
I got a good night's sleep last night but not
Tonight, it would appear, I've missed the slot
And I'm eating bags of crisps left behind
By Louis in February, forgot
But discovered the other day, a find
Naughty but nice, hang on, It's true I've pined
For more for long enough, I've got to sate
My appetite with a third crisp packet
It's better than smoking, it's time to wind
Down and get to bed, if I can relate
To settling down now and losing the plot
Tue 14 April
It's nearly half-past two and I have got
Work tomorrow, and time it just won't wait
I got a good night's sleep last night but not
Tonight, it would appear, I've missed the slot
And I'm eating bags of crisps left behind
By Louis in February, forgot
But discovered the other day, a find
Naughty but nice, hang on, It's true I've pined
For more for long enough, I've got to sate
My appetite with a third crisp packet
It's better than smoking, it's time to wind
Down and get to bed, if I can relate
To settling down now and losing the plot
Tue 14 April
Monday 13 April 2015
3161 - Kitchen sink drama
A quiet day after yesterday's extreme
No big occasions, no enormous crowd
A few of us at work, a pared-down team
The rest still on their Easter leave, no doubt
Felt a bit jaded, felt a bit washed-out
Anyway, now I feel like relaxing
I've recycled bottles and cans, that's good
Of me, and also cleaned the kitchen sink
I didn't realise that its colouring
Had turned a kind of brown stain over time
Having read an article all about
Germs in the kitchen, stung me to bleaching
Instead of just wiping it. Now it's clean
And shiny silver! The flat's looking proud!
No big occasions, no enormous crowd
A few of us at work, a pared-down team
The rest still on their Easter leave, no doubt
Felt a bit jaded, felt a bit washed-out
Anyway, now I feel like relaxing
I've recycled bottles and cans, that's good
Of me, and also cleaned the kitchen sink
I didn't realise that its colouring
Had turned a kind of brown stain over time
Having read an article all about
Germs in the kitchen, stung me to bleaching
Instead of just wiping it. Now it's clean
And shiny silver! The flat's looking proud!
Sunday 12 April 2015
3160 - Red letter day
A great day out with Jo at Old Trafford
Not only was it a vital derby
But she was a mascot for United
Held hands with Juan Mata, one of those she
Chose in the first place in her fantasy
Numbers were drawn from a hat in the end
She got number ten, we then thought Rooney!
She'll be at the front on TV, her hand
In hand with England's top player, the land
If not the world jealous! But hopes misled -
Instead it meant the tenth man stood in the
Excited queue of Red players, that band
Of men in the tunnel. 4-2 they scored
A great day for her, and of course for me!
Not only was it a vital derby
But she was a mascot for United
Held hands with Juan Mata, one of those she
Chose in the first place in her fantasy
Numbers were drawn from a hat in the end
She got number ten, we then thought Rooney!
She'll be at the front on TV, her hand
In hand with England's top player, the land
If not the world jealous! But hopes misled -
Instead it meant the tenth man stood in the
Excited queue of Red players, that band
Of men in the tunnel. 4-2 they scored
A great day for her, and of course for me!
Saturday 11 April 2015
3159 - Slowhead
I've felt lethargic all today, maybe
Because I drank a bit last night, but still
It was only four bottles. Watched TV
Some music progs, got my nostalgia fill
Not done much today, found some material
That I'd already written, a joke song
I can use on Tuesday night. Tried as well
As I could in my state to sing along
In my head and learn the lyrics. Morning
Will come tomorrow and on the settee
I'll spend another hour in rehearsal
For Tuesday and the Monday following
I've two songs to learn for that too. But the
Big thing tomorrow's naturally football...
Because I drank a bit last night, but still
It was only four bottles. Watched TV
Some music progs, got my nostalgia fill
Not done much today, found some material
That I'd already written, a joke song
I can use on Tuesday night. Tried as well
As I could in my state to sing along
In my head and learn the lyrics. Morning
Will come tomorrow and on the settee
I'll spend another hour in rehearsal
For Tuesday and the Monday following
I've two songs to learn for that too. But the
Big thing tomorrow's naturally football...
Friday 10 April 2015
3158 - If music be the food of jokes
It's Friday evening, I'm happy at home
Thought up some new jokes, looked through some old ones
Got some beer in, but as yet I've had none
Been busy being useful, election's
Providing some topical humour and
This will help me in my performances
I'm in the next two Saturdays, and bound
To make the most of creative chances
To practice and write new stuff, I fancy
Could be good if I do it while fresh - some
Real good stuff can be done quite early on
In the morning, straight after breakfastses
And now for relaxation, all too soon
Some music progs on Beeb 4 that look fun
Thought up some new jokes, looked through some old ones
Got some beer in, but as yet I've had none
Been busy being useful, election's
Providing some topical humour and
This will help me in my performances
I'm in the next two Saturdays, and bound
To make the most of creative chances
To practice and write new stuff, I fancy
Could be good if I do it while fresh - some
Real good stuff can be done quite early on
In the morning, straight after breakfastses
And now for relaxation, all too soon
Some music progs on Beeb 4 that look fun
Thursday 9 April 2015
3157 - The price isn't right
Another evening in, with no spending
Although I raised my eyebrows at the bill
In Sainsburys for a few items. Falling
Prices they say due to the price of oil?
Yet my bill seemed too high. But then I still
Saved by not going out. Most people that
Go out regularly don't drink, just swill
Out their chops with water or Cola Lite
I should do that myself when I go out
Instead I stay in to save on drinking
And don't even write much stuff, but it's brill
Lately for guitar practice, trying to get
Better. Now watching Question Time, thinking
Of a late night snack, my tummy to fill
Although I raised my eyebrows at the bill
In Sainsburys for a few items. Falling
Prices they say due to the price of oil?
Yet my bill seemed too high. But then I still
Saved by not going out. Most people that
Go out regularly don't drink, just swill
Out their chops with water or Cola Lite
I should do that myself when I go out
Instead I stay in to save on drinking
And don't even write much stuff, but it's brill
Lately for guitar practice, trying to get
Better. Now watching Question Time, thinking
Of a late night snack, my tummy to fill
Wednesday 8 April 2015
3156 - No beer today
A fast-paced day at work sorting out files
A fast-paced evening at home doing lots
I'm almost ready for my tea, but smiles
All round as I get ready for the pots
And pans - well, just pans really, got no pots
As such, I keep it simple, my kitchen
Is small, like my cooking skills. Got the hots
For fish fingers, baby - that's haute cuisine
By my standards, so soon I'll pop 'em in
The hunger's growing, starting to beguile
My thought process, despite those three biscuits
I scoffed at work, they're wearing off. Still thin
Though, sort of, and should stay that way since I'll
Be keeping off the beer til travelling starts
A fast-paced evening at home doing lots
I'm almost ready for my tea, but smiles
All round as I get ready for the pots
And pans - well, just pans really, got no pots
As such, I keep it simple, my kitchen
Is small, like my cooking skills. Got the hots
For fish fingers, baby - that's haute cuisine
By my standards, so soon I'll pop 'em in
The hunger's growing, starting to beguile
My thought process, despite those three biscuits
I scoffed at work, they're wearing off. Still thin
Though, sort of, and should stay that way since I'll
Be keeping off the beer til travelling starts
Tuesday 7 April 2015
3155 - Flat broke!
I'm enjoying the new flat floors today
Of course floors are flat - you know what I mean
The new floors in my flat, done yesterday
At lunchtime I went to the bank to clean
Out my account of £600. Mean
Old me does not like that, oh no
But it's a good price, three rooms looking mean
And modern! Got to save before I go
On holiday, or else I will have no
Spends for it! To do that I'll have to stay
In mostly; I can read and learn German
And practice guitar, practice for some shows
Mainly First Draft, but also comedy
At the King's Arms. It's still a happening scene
Of course floors are flat - you know what I mean
The new floors in my flat, done yesterday
At lunchtime I went to the bank to clean
Out my account of £600. Mean
Old me does not like that, oh no
But it's a good price, three rooms looking mean
And modern! Got to save before I go
On holiday, or else I will have no
Spends for it! To do that I'll have to stay
In mostly; I can read and learn German
And practice guitar, practice for some shows
Mainly First Draft, but also comedy
At the King's Arms. It's still a happening scene
Monday 6 April 2015
3154 - Manchester is red again
The floors have been done in my flat today
Got new floors in the bedroom, and in the
Bathroom and kitchen. The guys, all three, they
Did a good job, it looks superior
To what it looked like just one day before
Meanwhile, Derby won at Wigan and got
Malky Mackay sacked! Derby must be poor
If losing to us gets you sacked. It's not
Fair really, but I'm pleased Wigan are dropped
Like a stone to the First Division. Yay!
Man City lost at Palace, and now their
Title hopes are dead. Next Sunday a hot
Game at Old T, the Manchester derby
Josie is a mascot for Man U, yeah!
Got new floors in the bedroom, and in the
Bathroom and kitchen. The guys, all three, they
Did a good job, it looks superior
To what it looked like just one day before
Meanwhile, Derby won at Wigan and got
Malky Mackay sacked! Derby must be poor
If losing to us gets you sacked. It's not
Fair really, but I'm pleased Wigan are dropped
Like a stone to the First Division. Yay!
Man City lost at Palace, and now their
Title hopes are dead. Next Sunday a hot
Game at Old T, the Manchester derby
Josie is a mascot for Man U, yeah!
Sunday 5 April 2015
3153 - Knock knock who's there? Dunno
Enjoying the evening light as it faaaaades
I see a pale yellow sun through curtain
Tomorrow builders are here, not with spades
To do three floors and leave 'em spick and span
Must remember to get up earlier than
Nine, or soon afterwards, cos by 9:30
They'll be knock-knocking. Yesterday was fun
Pearl met Jo for first time in 3 months, we
Went to Koffee Pot on Oldham Street, the
New location for a good breakfast. Plates
Of mushrooms, eggs, beans, and a real mountain
Of tasty toast. Later, King's Arms to see
Some improv comedy. While no side-aches
It was at least different. A drink or ten
I see a pale yellow sun through curtain
Tomorrow builders are here, not with spades
To do three floors and leave 'em spick and span
Must remember to get up earlier than
Nine, or soon afterwards, cos by 9:30
They'll be knock-knocking. Yesterday was fun
Pearl met Jo for first time in 3 months, we
Went to Koffee Pot on Oldham Street, the
New location for a good breakfast. Plates
Of mushrooms, eggs, beans, and a real mountain
Of tasty toast. Later, King's Arms to see
Some improv comedy. While no side-aches
It was at least different. A drink or ten
3152 - Yes
OK so you think I'm inferior to
You but that's nonsense, because that ain't so
I don't really know how to compare to
You, because you seem to be so superior to
Me, as do most, but time will tell me so
Time does not exist, even though you say
It does, well there's things you don't know
And as for me, it's not clear that today
I know what's goin' on today, I pray
No I don't, I don't believe unlike you
I don't accept that things should be like so
That things should be like they say, like they say
No, on the contrary, that's not the way we do
Things round here, although we should do, although
Sat 4 April
You but that's nonsense, because that ain't so
I don't really know how to compare to
You, because you seem to be so superior to
Me, as do most, but time will tell me so
Time does not exist, even though you say
It does, well there's things you don't know
And as for me, it's not clear that today
I know what's goin' on today, I pray
No I don't, I don't believe unlike you
I don't accept that things should be like so
That things should be like they say, like they say
No, on the contrary, that's not the way we do
Things round here, although we should do, although
Sat 4 April
Friday 3 April 2015
3151 - Easter funnies
A quiet day at home, though trying quite hard
To do useful stuff. I worked on my act
Got some lyrics for my joke songs that should
Be good for 20th April, First Draft
Watched some TV, comedians from the past
Rik Mayall, Peter Sellers and Bob Hope
Fry and Laurie (on Wogan), lots of laughs
But now sadly I'm losing any hope
As I listen to Derby trying to grope
Their way back up to the top spots, but Lord!
They're behind at home to Watford. They've cracked
Partly due to injuries, they can't cope
With the pressure, it seems. Tomorrow would
Be a chance to learn some German. Mein Kraft!
To do useful stuff. I worked on my act
Got some lyrics for my joke songs that should
Be good for 20th April, First Draft
Watched some TV, comedians from the past
Rik Mayall, Peter Sellers and Bob Hope
Fry and Laurie (on Wogan), lots of laughs
But now sadly I'm losing any hope
As I listen to Derby trying to grope
Their way back up to the top spots, but Lord!
They're behind at home to Watford. They've cracked
Partly due to injuries, they can't cope
With the pressure, it seems. Tomorrow would
Be a chance to learn some German. Mein Kraft!
Thursday 2 April 2015
3150 - Debate the debate
I've been watching the seven leaders show
Conservative, Labour, Lib Democrat
The Greens, Plaid Cymru, SNP, and no
Sorry, yes, UKIP (they've not done all that)
Shame the ratings for Natalie Bennett
Didn't seem that good. The reactions to
Her statements about foreign aid shows that
Short-term selfishness flourishes when you
Put it to the people. So better to
Keep wealth where it already is, and go
With older rich votes, youngsters they don't get
Anything, they've no influence, but you
Must wonder if they simply want to go
To the same levels of wealth. Yes to that!
Conservative, Labour, Lib Democrat
The Greens, Plaid Cymru, SNP, and no
Sorry, yes, UKIP (they've not done all that)
Shame the ratings for Natalie Bennett
Didn't seem that good. The reactions to
Her statements about foreign aid shows that
Short-term selfishness flourishes when you
Put it to the people. So better to
Keep wealth where it already is, and go
With older rich votes, youngsters they don't get
Anything, they've no influence, but you
Must wonder if they simply want to go
To the same levels of wealth. Yes to that!
Wednesday 1 April 2015
3149 - Spend to save
I arranged to have my floors done next week
On Easter Monday, Ben and his mate will
Re-floor the spare bedroom, give that same tweak
To the bathroom, and the kitchen will thrill
Also to a new look. They said the bill
Would be £600, and though that is
Quite a bit, it's good value, and will kill
Three floors with one stone, so to speak. Louis'
Departure must not be wasted, no freeze
In my acceleration to the peak
Of rentability for the room, til
Someone moves in there, with flow of readies
To my bank account, which could look quite bleak
After this cost, and upcoming travel!
On Easter Monday, Ben and his mate will
Re-floor the spare bedroom, give that same tweak
To the bathroom, and the kitchen will thrill
Also to a new look. They said the bill
Would be £600, and though that is
Quite a bit, it's good value, and will kill
Three floors with one stone, so to speak. Louis'
Departure must not be wasted, no freeze
In my acceleration to the peak
Of rentability for the room, til
Someone moves in there, with flow of readies
To my bank account, which could look quite bleak
After this cost, and upcoming travel!
Tuesday 31 March 2015
3148 - I'm not only there for the beer
Off out shortly for a well-deserved pint
At the King's Arms comedy night, Salford
The weather's been bad, a night out I've pined
For these last two evenings, though not been bored
Kept myself busy, word up, word up, word
Started 'The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo'
Book (seen the film a while back) and it's weird
Very heavy going, interesting too
And a fitting read as I'm sitting through
The many episodes of 'The Bridge' - wind
My mind back to my own memory hoard
Of seeing Copenhagen and Malmo
And travelling the bridge by train, the sound
Crossed, two lands joined that once were far abroad
At the King's Arms comedy night, Salford
The weather's been bad, a night out I've pined
For these last two evenings, though not been bored
Kept myself busy, word up, word up, word
Started 'The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo'
Book (seen the film a while back) and it's weird
Very heavy going, interesting too
And a fitting read as I'm sitting through
The many episodes of 'The Bridge' - wind
My mind back to my own memory hoard
Of seeing Copenhagen and Malmo
And travelling the bridge by train, the sound
Crossed, two lands joined that once were far abroad
Monday 30 March 2015
3147 - Car trouble pt 9
The weather's wet as hell, hell yes it is
And there's more rain tomorrow, so they warn
So I'll stay in tonight, no wet or freeze
For me, and no booze either. Got to pawn
Everything this month anyway - I'm goin'
On holiday at the end of April
But also been caught motorway speedin'
Last month, driving north hurriedly with Pearl's
Stuff in the hired car. Not that evil
Only did 58, officer, please
But no, a fine awaits, points must be borne
But wait - I may qualify for a li'l
Training course. Hope I go on one of these
Fingers crossed that I don't end up forlorn
And there's more rain tomorrow, so they warn
So I'll stay in tonight, no wet or freeze
For me, and no booze either. Got to pawn
Everything this month anyway - I'm goin'
On holiday at the end of April
But also been caught motorway speedin'
Last month, driving north hurriedly with Pearl's
Stuff in the hired car. Not that evil
Only did 58, officer, please
But no, a fine awaits, points must be borne
But wait - I may qualify for a li'l
Training course. Hope I go on one of these
Fingers crossed that I don't end up forlorn
Sunday 29 March 2015
3146 - Ramming the point home
Been watching three episodes of The Bridge
And it's tired me out! Also I should read
While I've got some free time, my heritage
As a Derby fan well celebrated
By 'Clough's War' which suggests Clough was indeed
An out-of-control maverick, his own worst
Enemy at times, but brilliant, afraid
Of none, unable perhaps to stop cursed
Honesty that does us no good, a burst
Of ill-chosen words causing a wreckage
Of bad feelings when none were intended
Still, though Derby were left behind, Forest
Were the winners in the end - he managed
Them to two European Cups, he did
And it's tired me out! Also I should read
While I've got some free time, my heritage
As a Derby fan well celebrated
By 'Clough's War' which suggests Clough was indeed
An out-of-control maverick, his own worst
Enemy at times, but brilliant, afraid
Of none, unable perhaps to stop cursed
Honesty that does us no good, a burst
Of ill-chosen words causing a wreckage
Of bad feelings when none were intended
Still, though Derby were left behind, Forest
Were the winners in the end - he managed
Them to two European Cups, he did
Saturday 28 March 2015
3145 - Flat to(i)let
Oh shit, I need to go the the toilet
But I'll see if I can hang on until
I finish this sonnet, for this sonnet
Will then be finished quickly, so it will
Just like my shit when I use force of will
To force it out of my gut with a splash
Of toilet water that I hope won't spill
Onto the bathroom floor. Same when I slash
Or have a slash, no splash should miss and crash
Upon the floor, thereby making it wet
An ancient art, time immemorial
Has told me that when I fart, it can clash
With the desire to wee, causing the shit
To shoot out prematurely, floor to spoil
But I'll see if I can hang on until
I finish this sonnet, for this sonnet
Will then be finished quickly, so it will
Just like my shit when I use force of will
To force it out of my gut with a splash
Of toilet water that I hope won't spill
Onto the bathroom floor. Same when I slash
Or have a slash, no splash should miss and crash
Upon the floor, thereby making it wet
An ancient art, time immemorial
Has told me that when I fart, it can clash
With the desire to wee, causing the shit
To shoot out prematurely, floor to spoil
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