More has been coming to my attention
About the events that my memory blocked
Early on Friday morning, you know, when
I was an asshole, when my mind was fucked
By my attempt to see the bar was sucked
Dry. I remember nothing of it all
Apart from the moment when I was pushed
Over by a guy and fell off my stool
Because I’d abused the fucker, been cruel
And rude to a perfectly nice woman
With no self-control, my speech went unchecked
And I broke just about all social rules
Alcohol caused my mind to malfunction
And as my tongue mocked, it also self-mocked
Tuesday, 9 February 2010
Monday, 8 February 2010
1253 - What he said I said
Today I learned I’d sprinkled insults round
Like confetti at Thursday night’s works drink
Of what I said, no memory can be found
In my own head, but it has made me think
And worry that my brain went on the blink
For several hours. Once more, the alcohol
Has revealed its deadly poisonous sting
Let’s hope it hasn’t dug for me a hole
Just yet, anyway. And, watching football
On Saturday night, I once more felt bound
To get wine in. I could stay in the pink
Without it, or become red-faced like all
The other useless boozers, run aground
Like Whisky Galore, gored, ready to sink
Like confetti at Thursday night’s works drink
Of what I said, no memory can be found
In my own head, but it has made me think
And worry that my brain went on the blink
For several hours. Once more, the alcohol
Has revealed its deadly poisonous sting
Let’s hope it hasn’t dug for me a hole
Just yet, anyway. And, watching football
On Saturday night, I once more felt bound
To get wine in. I could stay in the pink
Without it, or become red-faced like all
The other useless boozers, run aground
Like Whisky Galore, gored, ready to sink
Sunday, 7 February 2010
1252 - In Pizza Hut, Didsbury
In Pizza Hut, Didsbury, did you see
The young girls and their young men, all looking
Painfully thin; on heroin, maybe
Or maybe that used to be me, so thin
I had a love-hate relationship in
That thin skin I was in then; it was cool
To suck in my stomach till all that’s seen
Was next to nothing, and when it was full
It emptied instantly, the fat all spilled
Somewhere in the ether. Even those three
In the doorway, good-humouredly waiting
For a waiter to show them to table
Will slowly fatten and, like stringy cheese
On pizza, it will stick, take some licking
The young girls and their young men, all looking
Painfully thin; on heroin, maybe
Or maybe that used to be me, so thin
I had a love-hate relationship in
That thin skin I was in then; it was cool
To suck in my stomach till all that’s seen
Was next to nothing, and when it was full
It emptied instantly, the fat all spilled
Somewhere in the ether. Even those three
In the doorway, good-humouredly waiting
For a waiter to show them to table
Will slowly fatten and, like stringy cheese
On pizza, it will stick, take some licking
1251 - Facing the counter in Starbucks
A sunny day in Fallowfield, students
Everywhere, and guess what? More girls than boys
As our group talked in Starbucks, no relent
For tired eyes; no, there was too much choice
To chew on and drink up, these thin young toys
Occasionally a bit of meat on one
My eyes turn back to our group, and I’m poised
To speak to it, whether it really wants
Me to or not, while the parade goes on
The queue flows on like a river, unspent
As rivulets of coffee spread all ways
Carried by skinny hands eager to learn
Not so much their curriculum subjects
More about where caffeinated blood flows
Saturday 6 February
Everywhere, and guess what? More girls than boys
As our group talked in Starbucks, no relent
For tired eyes; no, there was too much choice
To chew on and drink up, these thin young toys
Occasionally a bit of meat on one
My eyes turn back to our group, and I’m poised
To speak to it, whether it really wants
Me to or not, while the parade goes on
The queue flows on like a river, unspent
As rivulets of coffee spread all ways
Carried by skinny hands eager to learn
Not so much their curriculum subjects
More about where caffeinated blood flows
Saturday 6 February
Friday, 5 February 2010
1250 - Thank God I didn't...!
As I revealed yesterday, I was so
Late going to bed in the York Hilton
That I missed breakfast; I just had to go
Straight into the meeting, though I had downed
More than I should the night before. I frowned
And yawned repeatedly: the signs were clear
Especially when my face turned green; I’d gone
Too far; I had made myself sick with beer
Kept thinking, ‘I’ll have to run out of here
Any minute, to throw up… I might throw
Up on the conference room carpet, stain on
Top of all existing stains, all my sheer
Hard work in setting up this meeting no
Match for what’s now my sick reputation…!’
Late going to bed in the York Hilton
That I missed breakfast; I just had to go
Straight into the meeting, though I had downed
More than I should the night before. I frowned
And yawned repeatedly: the signs were clear
Especially when my face turned green; I’d gone
Too far; I had made myself sick with beer
Kept thinking, ‘I’ll have to run out of here
Any minute, to throw up… I might throw
Up on the conference room carpet, stain on
Top of all existing stains, all my sheer
Hard work in setting up this meeting no
Match for what’s now my sick reputation…!’
1249 - Two breakfasts in Yolkshire
Woke up with a dog on my bed, coffee
Served by my host, then out for our breakfast
At a nearby greasy spoon Leeds café
I didn’t think that one would be my last
Cooked breakfast this week. No - that same repast
Would pass my taste buds next morning when I’d
Be sat in the York Hilton, eating fast
To make the meeting on time. Two eggs (fried),
Sausages, toast, the usual; inside
It all went. Then I went myself: foggy
Morning in Yorkshire: fields of snow that passed
Into a thick haze; all-white countryside
The meeting over, out for a curry
Stayed up really late and missed my breakfast!
Thursday 4 February
Served by my host, then out for our breakfast
At a nearby greasy spoon Leeds café
I didn’t think that one would be my last
Cooked breakfast this week. No - that same repast
Would pass my taste buds next morning when I’d
Be sat in the York Hilton, eating fast
To make the meeting on time. Two eggs (fried),
Sausages, toast, the usual; inside
It all went. Then I went myself: foggy
Morning in Yorkshire: fields of snow that passed
Into a thick haze; all-white countryside
The meeting over, out for a curry
Stayed up really late and missed my breakfast!
Thursday 4 February
1248 - Dog but no partridge
I’m staying at a mate’s house here in Leeds
After a poetry night out; few there
Because Leeds/Tottenham was on TV
And besides, tonight saw snowy weather
That may have meant that for many, the car
Was not an option on the ice rink roads
Indeed, when I was rounding a corner
I skidded dangerously near a row
Of parked cars… Managed just in time to slow
And carry on, no harm done. Now I need
Some sleep, but my mate’s dog’s not being fair
He keeps disturbing me; he’ll come and go
And chew, scratch, whine as though he needs his feed
He may want to play, but I’m tired, so there
Wed 3 February 2010
After a poetry night out; few there
Because Leeds/Tottenham was on TV
And besides, tonight saw snowy weather
That may have meant that for many, the car
Was not an option on the ice rink roads
Indeed, when I was rounding a corner
I skidded dangerously near a row
Of parked cars… Managed just in time to slow
And carry on, no harm done. Now I need
Some sleep, but my mate’s dog’s not being fair
He keeps disturbing me; he’ll come and go
And chew, scratch, whine as though he needs his feed
He may want to play, but I’m tired, so there
Wed 3 February 2010
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