3209 - Evenings of light

Last day of May, the best month of the year
Or sometimes it's June, hotter, lighter nights
June starts tomorrow, and I'm off the beer
For a while, not totally, but I might
Have a good go at cutting down, despite
Since payday going out on Friday and
Having a few beers, but was still a slight
Amount really, and rest of the weekend
I've had none and I wanted none. I'll spend
(Hopefully) a lot less this month and gear
Things up to, saving for autumn's travels, flight
To Bulgaria's already paid for. Planned
Purchase of bed this month, tattoos, not sure
Maybe, maybe not. Hail, evenings of light!

3208 - The colour of mud

Before buying a bed for the spare room
Thought it needed painting - the walls looked bad
Grimy and dirty, discoloured. The gloom
Would be dispelled by applying a tad
Of white paint over the bad patches, add
Some brightness, not that much paint was needed
There was only one pot left, so I grabbed
It in Poundstretcher. I prised off the lid
To my dismay it looked brown, but I stirred
Away with a spoon and it turned white. Spoon
Sacrificed for a good cause, time to pad
My tiny cheap brush on the wall and slide
It over those stains. But no whiteness bloomed
Instead a sort of pale brown darkly spread...

3207 - Blossoms in the spring

Been on a rare gig night out to see a
Young up and coming band called the Blossoms
It's probably just Blossoms, but who gives a...
Anyway, that aside, I touched some bums...
Oops, sorry, ha ha, no, really, sir, none
Were deliberately touched, couldn't not
Crowd was dense, I touched a boy's bum
Too, and deffo didn't mean to do that
It's payday, it's here again at long last
This month I must buy a bed for the spare
Room, but wait, first I should put some
Fresh white paint on the walls so that the flat
And that room is attractive to renter
Then maybe I'll be coining some big sums

3206 - The thousand year FIFA

Sepp Hitler, sorry, Blatter, won't resign
No matter how they unearth corruption
He obviously has no shame, just a spine
Made of stainless steel, voicing opinion
That all the naughty stuff must stop, and soon
Sorry, NOW! Now please elect me once more
He expects his minions in Cameroon
And Bahrain and Malaysia and Timor
To vote for him, so he can wipe the floor
With those bossy, domineering scions
Those pesky old world empire Europeans
Let's have a World Cup solely in Qatar
In the summer heat in the desert clime
Logical choice? It don't add up, that sum...

3205 - No quarter for Qatar (or Blatter)

A shocking start to the day in Zurich
Dawn raids on senior FIFA potentates
At a prestigious hotel by the lake
With possible fallout affecting states
Who may have won the World Cup-hosting race
Let's hope the US legal team, allied
With the Swiss, on whose soil these things took place
Will not at all be influenced or afraid
How long since level playing fields have been played
The impact on football could be epic
This corrupt balloon of gold must deflate
Blatter must be scythed with a sharp grass blade
The seized computers may reveal a slick
Of oil on the pitch that should seal some fates

3204 - Shat out of hell

A varied day, took it off work to go
To a driving awareness course up in
Bury, a four hour workshop that had no
Possibility of being late - a fine
Is what you get - and points - for arriving
Late, or for a no-show, or no ID
This harsh enforcement had me worrying
So much, albeit just subconsciously
That I woke from a nightmare, eight thirty
In which I couldn't pack in time, too slow
And couldn't find passport, before heading
To the airport for a flight home. Legacy
Of recent flights to / from Europe also...
Then - ska-tological comedian

3203 - Driving Miss Crazy

I've enjoyed my Bank Holiday Monday
Stayed home and did all sorts of things, relaxed
Tomorrow is another off-work day
My driving awareness course that I asked
To attend to avoid points. Harms your track
Record to have speeding points on licence
So I'll have a haircut, head for the trams
To Bury, all the while I will rehearse
My comedy sets for Tuesday and Wednes-
day (King's Arms and Tiger Lounge), though must say
I need to rehearse right now, practice fast
Or I won't see through my sunglasses lens
When I wear shades and hat to look OK
Trying to hide my thin and greying locks

3202 - Footy and tea

The daylight's dying, but there'll be no rage
I'm not Dylan Thomas, not meant to be
I'm glad about that, cos he was quite large
And also Welsh. Just joking, obviously
I like the Welsh accent, and musically
There's lots of stars from there who make good sound
Today I made notes to my holiday
Pix, now I won't forget where I was bound
Or what that statue was, or that high ground
That took about three hours, then ate, then watched
The last day of the Premier League, only
Me, no shared comments, Louis' not around
These days. Met Nance for an update engage-
ment over tea, Northern Quarter trendy

3201 - The Pound of Music

My feet ache, as they did regularly
On my recent European holiday
The Eurovision Song Contest's on, they
Are about to vote. Really hope that they
Show some shots of Vienna, where I strayed
Just over a week ago! A great place
So many elegant streets, and much I'd
Like to have seen but didn't have time. Grace
And monumentality, grandeur, space
No, they're going to have an Austrian spree
But in song on stage. Oh well. It's OK
If I want Austrian images, could face
For first time ever, perhaps, just maybe
Watch 'The Sound of Music'! Could be worse, eh?

3200 - People come and go

Late night sonnet writing ain't so easy
Especially if you're a little worse for
Wear, as is obvious to people free
Of prior association before
They know me or you and so then therefore
They judge but unfairly, knowing nothing
I had to do stuff at work that was poor
No back-up, from absent managers, things
Were sorted. After that, Tracey's leaving
Do and plenty of drink was drunk, you see
Now I'm back home, and things don't seem so sore
Indeed, I'm celebrating, enjoying
Just being here, safe and sound, and simply
Seeing it through, relaxing like of yore

Fri 22 May


       

3199 - New war

Oh my goodness, life is well, just a ride
And each day is precious, like to think I
See it as pleasure, not a chore, not snide
To other people, not two-faced, but try
To give and receive pleasure, that's the high
Point and message, nothing else is as good
Don't need a religion to justify
My intention of global brotherhood
In fact, religion divides, tribal blood
Is shed endlessly as they always did
The difference in recent decades was why
The west thought it ruled the roost, but it should
No longer think that, can no more decide
Alone thanks to its cheap technology

3198 - That will be the week, that will

Just written four songs with funny lyrics
Replacing the conventional old words
A set I hope to do twice in next week's
Comedy slots - it may not win awards
It should, but we don't get our just deserts
However, enemies just make us strong
In order to survive their gunfire bursts
Like superheroes, we just can't be flung
Like superheroes, we can do no wrong
Our confidence can overcome their tricks
Our righteousness overcomes their absurd
And when the time comes to unleash our tongue
We'll spit them into space with verbal licks
They'll return to earth broken, sheathe their swords

3197 - Rug flats

Popped round after work to see V and P
Forgot to take V's big wheel fridge magnet
From Vienna, how forgetful of me
It's so hard remembering not to forget
At their place I picked up a rug, carpet
Isn't that common in my flat, which means
I don't need a vacuum cleaner in it
As brushing's enough to keep the floor clean
But this rug means I can no more be seen
With no hoover in the flat. It might be
Let to tenants soon, if I do a flit
Down to London, prove I'm not a has-been
(That's if I ever was), but nice to be
In bed reading. How could I get upset?

3196 - Seasons in the sun (and wind)

Soon after work, and eating of my tea
I quickly set to continuing to save
My many holiday pictures, finally
Downloading them all onto my hard drive
Now quickly writing this so I can have
A play on my guitar 'fore relaxing
It's nearly nine, and the sun's still above
The horizon, as we're in the late spring
Mid-May, when nature seems so welcoming
A nice time of year, though it's cold lately
To go out with no jacket would be brave
Although we're almost in June. I'm saving
Money for a while, think I'll boycott the
Concerts and days out I'd planned, but that's tough

3195 - That was the two weeks, that was

So many holiday pictures I took
Been posting them today, it took all day
First, posting them from phone onto Facebook
Replying to comments was fun, I'd say
But now I'm numbering them, not yet half-way
Through that process, and saving to hard drive
Good to relive it all, though, all that way
I travelled, walked like you wouldn't believe
It's reminded me all those things I strove
To pack into each day, people will look
At those pix and wonder, and some may say
'I want to go there,' and some may just grieve
That they can't, but despite their sad bad luck
I hope they liked seeing my holiday!

3194 - Where it's at

And now today, had a good time with Jo
Not seen her for two weeks, she is the best
Her Mum's done her back in, but she will go
Back to normality after a rest
Meanwhile, I think London is the real test
If I can make it there I can make it
Anywhere, dreams maybe, but it is blessed
With movers and shakers, more than this shit-
Hole of northern-ness, where there's no real wit
A sideways job move would let me there grow
Without real poverty constraining, let's
Give it a try, get my act ready, flit
From trying to impress no marks, a flow
A trajectory leading to success...

Sat 16 May

3193 - The gallant South

I'm gonna make this quick, I'm a day late
With this sonnet, I forgot to do it
Yesterday, what with work and getting straight
After my travels. So, remember it
I was told at work once again I'm shit
But I have potential. Come on, are you
Any better than me, no, so please quit
Feeding me this bullshit. Realised my true
Home might be London, that's the place where you
Are seen and recognised, and that's where fate
May await me, plus I love that great zit
On the face of the British landscape, grew
To unimaginable proportions, great
Place of destiny, maybe there I'll flit...

Fri 15 May

3192 - Back in the UKUK

So here I am back home, but honestly
I couldn't afford to be away more
I was shocked at my bank account money
Though I shouldn't be. First there was the floor
Of my flat last month, done by the builder
And after that I went on my travels
Specifically, a European tour
To Czech Republic, German towns and hills
And Austria, where I heard no yodels
I'm still in Europe in my head. You see
All these great buildings and Germanic lore
In museums and all around. It fills
Your head, immersed in sights and history
But you don't want to travel forever

3191 - Not very Prague-matic

Why did I choose to end my tour in Prague
(Where I began?) What a dumb decision
Should have flown home from Vienna. A drag
This last day, waiting near the bus station
For a four hour bus to Prague, no reason
To do this, I realise now, all too late
A waste of time and money, but it's done
At least all my travelling has turned out neat
Let's hope this applies to today - that's great
A successful and varied trip. I dug
Everywhere I went, though Munich was one
Big disappointment how few friends I made...
Last night in Vienna, a good chinwag
With a few people. Last day there was fun!

Wed 13 May

3190 - Fancy Danube

My last full day, and due to tiredness
Of feet from yesterday, travelled about
Extensively by U-bahn. First stop was
The bus station, to buy a bus ticket
To Prague for 20 euros - no repeat
Of my last journey which cost 50... Yikes!
A very hot day, so tried to keep out
Of the sun. Next stop, seeing as I liked
Vienna's vast streets and buildings, unlike
Anywhere else, the architecture place
In the Museums Quarter. In the heat
I checked out Schonbrunn Palace, but I hiked
Away immediately, preferred quietness
Of the Danube, north of the tourists' shouts

Tue 12 May

3189 - Lost in Austria

I've walked further in one day than ever
Before - at least that's how it feels right now
My feet ache so much and I need a shower
I had one this morning, but need somehow
To clean every part again, yes I do
I paid a huge amount to Austrian trains
(Should've got the bus) from Salzburg and to
Vienna. Took some time to check me in
At the hostel, so didn't start walking
Round Viennese sights til half-two. But the
Day's been marvellously sunny, and allowed
Me to walk almost everywhere within
The tourist area of old Vienna
Amazing buildings. Nineteenth century wow!

Mon 11 May

3188 - No trouble brewing

What to do, my second day in Salzburg?
I hadn't a clue, Hellbrunn Palace was
The favourite, someone had been there who dug
It, but Vienna has got palaces
That are better. Looked at maps, references
To Stiegl Brewery tours where you can learn
About the brewing process - thought this is
A better way to spend the day. It turned
Out it was a free event. Austrian
Families were there in droves, wore clothes so snug
Trousers above the knee, flouncy dresses
Brass bands, huge amounts of beer, and mountains
In the background. Climbed Kapuzinerberg
Afterwards, then bought six-pack Stiegl beers

Sun 10 May

3187 - This is where I got that hat

Woke quite early and caught bus to Salzburg
At last I'm in Austria properly
Looked at a map, saw things to take a look
At, and noticed a guided tour. Quickly
Walked down to Mozart Square in time for the
Usual pseudo-historical affair
It was quite boring but necessary
However, after wondering what else there
Could possibly be to do, the sun's fair
Rays started shining. My unguided walk
Was most enjoyable, up in the trees
Above town, on the big rock. Market wares
Attracted my attention, and I splurged
Lots on an Austrian hat (for comedy!)

Sat 9 May

3186 - Lake Dischtricht

My good luck on this holiday has held
Berchtesgaden's an outdoor kind of place
The sun shone til 4:30, so we sailed
(Me and a guy called Jet) on this high lake
Called Konigsee (King's Lake) and saw the face
Of Mt Watzmann, the second highest peak
In Germany. At the far side, amazed
At the beauty of Obersee, and walked
Alongside it and beyond, trying to seek
A route up the steep hill to waterfall
Was successful. Next, because of footache
No more long walks, but cable-car technique
Took us up Mt Jenner, where we beheld
Great views of lake and Berchtesgaden. Ace!

Fri 8 May

3185 - Burgers and beer gardens in Berchtesgaden

The journey went well, finally left Munich
By bus to Salzburg, then back to Deutschland
Immediately by train, to Burger King
Hostel in Berchtesgaden, afternoon
'Bout half-past one, the sun was shining down
Made enquiries at the tourist office
And also found a Lidl store, and found
An amazingly cheap beer store with its
Prices of good bottled beer, only cents
Each (less than one euro), and so I picked
Up five of these local beers for the grand
Sum of only six euros - under six
Actually! Heaven! Met Jet, went walking
Round Berchtesgaden. Now bedtime's at hand...

Thur 7 May

3184 - A father, who art in Munich

This is my last full day in Munich and
It was very similar to yesterday
But reversed in order. First, art. Began
With a visit to the Alte Pinakothek
You just gotta love a Flemish master
Or fifty. Plus Rubens, Rembrandt, works not
As well-known to me simply because they're
Not housed in London. After I came out
Of there, the sky cleared, and I had a good
Walk round the 'English Garden' which was grand
Except that I just kept losing my way
Never did find the Chinese Tower! I fought
My way out of that maze to watch Bayern
Get hammered 3-0 by Barca today

Wed 6 May

3183 - Munching in Munchen (at last)

A hot day, did not need to take my coat
Got the U-bahn to the Olympic zone
Really liked the stadium and how it's set
In a park with great views of tower and town
If you climb the hill built on things knocked down
And turned to rubble by British bombing
In the war, then they let grass grow upon
It all, and hey - some nice hills! Tasting
Currywurst for the first time. Interesting
But too much tomato. Then, welcome seat
On the tube to Allianz Arena, home
To Bayern Munich football team. Going
Back to the centre. New museum's got
Lots of info on Nazi Munich. Boom!

Tue 5 May

3182 - No munching in Munchen

I'll write this now, while I'm here just waiting
For Minji Kim to message, so I know
Where to meet, although I have an inkling
She said Odeonsplatz, but that's lacking
In detail. I've just been there - it's quite big
Which cafe are they in? And they're eating
While I'm starving, but maybe I could go
Without food, just drink beer, from stein I'll swig
And if need be, a takeaway to dig
At the hunger if it comes later. So...
Spoke to a nice Romanian nurse sitting
On the train to Munich. Once here, I go
Straight into a 'Third Reich tour' - fun seeing
Inside the Hofbrauhaus. More beer halls now?

Mon 4 May

3181 - News from Nuremberg

I woke at 12, slept well and recovered

From last night's drinks with Julius. The weather

Is rainy today, so I decided

To look round the National Museum here

I saw most of its many rooms, took four

Hours, beginning with a guided tour that

Focused on certain objects, how monks were

Living there, never speaking. But she said

They found buried females too - funny, that

Maybe it wasn't so terribly bad!

I'm typing this in Five Reasons - that's the

Name of this Nuremberg hostel I'm at

It's getting dark, and I still need some food

Think I'll walk outside, find a cheap supper...

3180 - Not such a blue night after all!

I'm writing this on Sunday, I'm afraid
But that is because of last night's night out
In Nuremberg with Julius - went on late
He was supposed to go at ten, did not
And in the end missed his train, stuck about
The station all night, I suppose - oh dear
He seemed to lose his bearings easily
At least I found the station. Drank some beer -
Much beer, even - thank God I didn't steer
In the direction of Bamberg! (He'd said
Let's meet there!) After dark, buildings were lit
In blue light, but missed it all. Did see a
Flaming sculpture, though. I slept well, delayed
Getting up til 12. Missed breakfast, no doubt!

Sat 2 May

3179 - Don't Argue with Prague!

Lucky I wrote last night's sonnet before
A marathon drinking session outside
The hostel, sitting in the cold night air
For hour after hour. Think we must have stayed
Out there til 5.30. The light had made
The bedroom bright when I closed the curtain
But after a quiet start, the evening played
Its part in a great day, had so much fun
Listening to Jan do his Cockney accent
I shook with laughter, that I can assure
Today, on four hour's sleep, I climbed the height
Up to the castle, crossed the Vltava
By two bridges. Could do with rest for sure
But may not get it before drinks are plied

Fri 1 May

3178 - Eastern bloc blog 'bout Prague

First full day in Prague, first full day's always
Exciting, getting used to a new land
Getting to know the buses and tramways
Two tours I've done, helped me to understand
The layout of old Prague, and then beyond
(On the 'alternative tour'). Saw street art
Saw galleries (from the outside!) and learned
About 3D printers and bitcoins, part
Of the changing world, try to take to heart
Nika was the morning guide, a nice face
From Ljubljana. Tomas was the 'art man'
In the afternoon, at Cross Club, then part
At Florenc station, bus back to my stay
At Elf Hostel. Most of it's gone as planned!

Thur 30 April

3177 - I'm not being vague - I'm in Prague

I'm safely at the Hostel Elf in Prague
Got here with no problems, got travel card
For all three days here, I'm already org-
anised for tomorrow, free tour with guide
Get to know the main sites. I can't afford
The segway tour, but bike hire's possible...
Of the Czech language I can't speak a word
But the hostel guys speak English quite well
As I'm sure many folk will do. Travel
Is easy for an English speaker, tongue
That's spoken everywhere, you're never barred
From being understood. If affable
Then you can have a good chat, get the bug
Once more for unknown pleasures, not be bored

Wed 29 April