Thursday 29 September 2011

1851 - Europa faux-pas

Everyone should be in the eurozone
A common currency for different states
It's turned out to be such financial fun
So simple without the old exchange rates
Although I must admit to calculate
Which cent coin is which when held in the hand
Ain't easy, nor is it to inculcate
Prudence by the Greeks and Italians
They spend, they don't save, unlike the Germans
Yet the Germans must now spend to save one
And all other members, must stimulate
The European body, moribund
Though it seems right now, propped up by big loans
Like a dependent's fix of opiates

Wednesday 28 September 2011

1850 - Don't blame the potato

In 1850 the Irish famine
Was still oppressing the population
Many look back now and looked back even then
At the somewhat cruel administration
Back in far more comfortable London
And on those landowners' country estates
With servants dishing up piles of protein
Much of it meat and grain onto their plates
Grown and grazed in Ireland. As mortal waste
Followed potato blight that struck hard in
'45, food exports just carried on
Profit above relief, farm tenants chased
Out of their cottages to save paying
For food for them. Starvation, one million

1849 - Burdened by kilt

Awoke at 4 a.m. - at 4 a.m!!
The reason? My alarm was set for 5:
15, and I waited for the alarm
To go off - prone, but mentally alive
The Glasgow train by which I would arrive
In Bonnie Scotland left at half-past 6
And it would not be worth staying alive
If I missed it - my career would be nixed
No salary, no mortgage, mortar, bricks
I'd almost certainly come to self-harm
Although cowardly enough to survive
And continue to dodge life's artful tricks
Anyway, that disaster did not come
And at the meeting, full and frank talk thrived

Tue 27 Sep

Monday 26 September 2011

1848 - Birth of the nations

The year of revolutions, '48
All kinds of tension, upheaval, unrest
The French July Monarchy met its fate
A new Second Republic drew first breath
While workers fought in Paris. The Chartists
In England briefly seemed a real threat
Perhaps seeing the German Parliament
In Frankfurt, and the mass of French voters
All having their say, yet the British got
Their way more peacefully, just had to wait
A few years, till the Liberals flew the nest
And took their seats. Hungary, Denmark, wars
South America, conflict, and the state
Of Italy soon to be born and blessed

Sunday 25 September 2011

1847 - Written in the stars

Looking back at 1847
The year was notable for two main things
The conclusion neared of the Mexican-
American War which, it's true, did bring
New lands to American belonging
New Mexico and California
But should these lands be free or slave-owning
That debate rumbled on to civil war
Soon the gold rush would draw men westwards there
Meanwhile in England's green and pleasant land
Bleak winters on the moors caused suffering
And early death, but not until Jane Eyre
And Wuthering Heights were dreamed of and written
By the Bronte sisters, candles flickering

1846 - Pitch almost perfect

The football season's proving interesting
England look set for Euro 2012
Wayne Rooney's doing the headline-grabbing
Manchester United's balding Scouse elf
Manchester City have excelled themselves
Leaving Chelsea to fight for third with Spurs
Arsenal need quick improvement in health
To compete with the top four, short on stars
Could this be the year Lancashire suffers
Bolton and Blackburn are both struggling
And will Wigan at last be overwhelmed
One division below, Derby, winners
Again, now third - our fans will be getting
Excited - promotion, glamour and wealth!!!

Saturday 24 September 2011

1845 - Recuerdos de Espana

Relaxing on a Friday evening with
Classical music from Madrid - Simon
Rattle and the Berlin Philharmonic
Looks and sounds good on this television
memories not of Alhambra but northern
And central Spain, even the Teatro
Royal itself, from 2009
That October I had a real good go
At seeing it all - Burgos, Toledo
The Basque Country, Navarre, Gijon, Madrid
Mountain ranges both wooden and barren
Salamanca, Santiago, Vigo
Even Portuguese Porto, ending with
Bilbao, then Biarritz... Travel heaven!

Fri 23 Sept

Thursday 22 September 2011

1844 - Work and the weather

First day back at work for, well, quite a while
Woke early, got in early, did a lot
Just as well, as there were lots of emails
And two meetings, but at least I've now got
My feet back under the desk. It's not hot
Any more. I had to wear a T-shirt
In bed last night, and, walking to work, what
I noticed was, my hands were cold, the first
Instance of this since maybe last March. Worse
Than that though is Switzerland. I'd read while
On the train to Lausanne, more than a spot
Of snow had already fallen, a burst
Of white around St Moritz. Had to smile -
It seemed such an English news story plot

1843 -Haute cuisine de Salford

A quiet night's sleep in my bed, not a dorm
Typed up my holiday sonnets before
Collecting Pearl, who wasn't at all warm
The wind blew strongly. At first we weren't sure
Where to go for lunch, or to park the car
So drove to Salford Quays and ate inside
Cafe Rouge, sheltered from the gusty roar
She's happy in her job but can't decide
Whether to take promotion - she's worried
About going freelance, with its short-term
Contracts. Shopped for books, then took her sister
Josie for tea - a Chinese meal with fried
Rice, in the Alderley Rose. Time had come
For Josie to go home to sleep and snore...

Wed 21 Sept

Wednesday 21 September 2011

1842 - Goodbye, Lausanne

A sunny day to close the holiday
My final few hours spent among the Swiss
A full breakfast in Zurich, on my way
By tram to the station, carrying this
Heavy bag of mine, weighing down my wrist
And dodgy left elbow - repetitive
Strain from guitar-playing - Bern-bound, I'll miss
This interesting country, so expensive
Bern to Lausanne - I'll be quite sad to leave
This lakeside town, my favourite, I would say
Of those I visited. Pretty Swiss Miss
Or two sitting in the sun - attractive
View of girls and mountains. A train delay -
I almost miss the plane home - near crisis!

Tue 20 Sept

1841 - The gnomes of Zurich

I've looked all over, combed each street and bridge
But I still can't find the gnomes of Zurich
From a tram window, scanned each likely pitch
But I still can't find the gnomes of Zurich
Leprechauns I've seen on St Stephen's Green
Abominable snowmen on high ridge
Defeated it seems, though I've never been
For I still can't find the gnomes of Zurich
I climbed a high church tower, surveyed the scene
From where old Ulrich Zwingli used to preach
Checked the apartment lived in by Lenin
No little men in suits looking quite rich
I've looked all over, combed each street and bridge
But I still can't find the gnomes of Zurich

Mon 19 Sept

1840 - Bern to be wild

My feet ache even more - I've walked round Bern
Now, as well as an exhibition in
Lausanne before I left, my one concern
In going there was just the visiting
Emmanuelle, who was exhibiting
Her range of clothes, called 'Vetements Joyeuses'
But specifically raincoats for women
Which she designs in eyecatching colours
Dodging the rain after we said goodbyes
I got the bus downhill to Gare, Lausanne
Got bags from hostel and then caught the train
Via Fribourg to Bern, casting my eyes
On the lake, then green landscapes as we turned
Northwards away from the jagged mountains

Sun 18 Sept

1839 - Mist on the water

My feet ache - well, I've walked round Lausanne, twice
Once this morning and again this evening
And if you don't know, it's a hilly place
Especially if you take some wrong turnings
I took the train to Vevey - exciting
It was, despite the rain - the lake, the peaks
Then beyond Montreux to the once chilling
Chateau de Chillon which held many treats
Not least its cast of actors and their feats
Of medieval lifestyle, medieval dress
Lots of good photos and some interesting
Anecdotes to tell. Reached Montreux, walking
By the lake, sunny again... But my feet!
Back to Lausanne, bought more food, but the price
Is mounting, despite my penny-pinching

Sat 17 Sept

1838 - Mountains and fountains

So hot and sunny again, Geneva
Was as its best, but where was the Jet d'Eau?
You know, the giant fountain that is the
Symbol of the city... We waited for
It to be swiched on and then watched it grow
To such a height, splashing the watchers on
The narrow jetty. Then Old Town, MAMCO
(Art gallery), River Rhone, and Mont Blanc
View from the lakeside and then later from
The train to Lausanne. Hostel and shower
I'm tired because dorm companions are so
Thoughtless sometimes, waking up everyone
And snoring all night. Got to go to the
Local shops before they close, don't you know?

Fri 16 Sept

1837 - D'ye never go to Geneva?

A lovely sunny day to start it off
Morning spent reading about Switzerland
Made a few notes, checked maps, packed and set off
For the airport. A fairly late flight, and
Dark when the easyJet flight came to land
In Geneva. Talked to a French lady
On the plane who sells French cheeses - that sounds
Funny, doesn't it? It proved real easy
To get the train from airport to city
So much so that I spent more than enough
Time and money in a pub, made a friend
Of a bloke from Nottingham who's really
Clever and works at CERN where they do stuff
Like scary atomic experiments

Thur 15 Sept

Wednesday 14 September 2011

1836 - Tex-Mex, Oz and Swiss

In 1836 the Alamo
Battle took place, as the fight for Texas
Against the Mexicans started to glow
Red hot. Not a lot else, except perhaps
Charles Darwin's Beagle voyage, Galapagos
Behind him now, the wide Pacific crossed
Exploring round Sydney, Australians
Meanwhile evolving their new state, those lost
Souls from British prisons settling the west
Round Perth, that most remote town. Tomorrow
I'm off to Switzerland. No Brenner Pass
By car. First I'm touring the scenic coast
Of Lake Geneva, then by train I'll go
To Bern and Zurich. Time to meet the Swiss!

Tuesday 13 September 2011

1835 - Handy Andy

A standout figure in pre-Civil War
America must be Andrew Jackson
Of Northern Irish stock, with bright red hair
His family suffered and died when Britain
Tried to prevent US independence
He was wounded when he refused to clean
A British officer's boots. Lawyer, then
Military man, and soon, at New Orleans
In 1812, that battle won was seen
To propel him to President, after
He'd made money as a slave landowner
In Tennessee, and most cruelly driven
The Indians from Florida. In 18-
35, he was shot at twice but saw
Another day, as luck spared him again

Monday 12 September 2011

1834 - D'ye ken Bob Peel?

1834 - the year Robert Peel
First became Prime Minister, under William
The Fourth. Peel was northern, but with a feel
For Tory values, since he was the son
Of a rich industrialist. Melbourne
Was the Whig PM who had presided
Over the issue of voting reform
And Peel, a liberal Tory, now added
The Factory Act, and so regulated
The previously inhumane, awful
Working conditions, including children
Also, workhouses proliferated
A roof and bed for the poor, and a meal
For which, unlike now, they worked in return

Sunday 11 September 2011

1833 - Memories of ten years ago

Ten years ago today, 9/11
We'd say the 11th of September
2001, 2011
Blurs into one, even looks similar
A day easier than most to remember
I was told about it while out shopping
Then heard the second tower collapse on my car
Radio. Then I remember watching
The highlights on a loop - also sitting
In that rented living room, also stunned
Were big friendly Nick and sexy Sarah
Good housemates mostly, from my life long gone
Changes take place, mostly for the better

Saturday 10 September 2011

1832 - Strange changes

In 1832 the Reform Act
Came in, which awarded more men the vote
Though still a minority. Heirs of Pitt
Opposed, but pressure mounted till it broke
Conservative resistance, and the joke
Of rotten boroughs, and voteless large towns
Was ended for good. Someone new awoke
This year, the year of Charles Lutwidge Dodgson's
Birth - enigmatic author, and Britain's
Most famous weirdo, seemingly trapped
In childhood, yet clever beyond reproach
Clearly he was attracted by children's
Innocent virginity but still met
And impressed adults too with what he wrote

Friday 9 September 2011

1831 - A hunchback whale of a tale

Dating from the year 1831
Is a great novel by Victor Hugo
And it's called 'The Hunchback of Notre Dame'
One description from it still haunts me so
And that's the view of Paris seen as though
You were scanning the cityscape from up
The cathedral, four hundred years ago
That, and the tragic end when she's strung up
That's Esmeralda, despite being shut up
For her own safety in the tower by shunned
King Kong / Elephant Man / Quasimodo
She didn't stab Captain Phoebus, but stop
The mad mob you could not. The gypsy scum
Must be taught a lesson. This girl must go

Thursday 8 September 2011

1830 - The Belgian mystery explained

This year saw exciting times in Belgium
The country as we know it created
Breaking away with its revolution
From the United Netherlands which had
Been put together by various allied
Victors over France as a buffer zone
Against it. This didn't work - united
It wasn't, for it contained Francophone
Catholics in the south, known as Walloons
As well as Flemish Catholics, hard done
By, they felt generally dominated
By those northern Dutch Calvinists, and groaned
Under William the First, but now had come
In 1830 to their own statehood

Wednesday 7 September 2011

1829 - Train of events

In 1829 the early train
Stephenson's 'Rocket' won the Rainhill Trials
Between four engines on the flat terrain
His company won the contract, the miles
From Liverpool to Manchester uncoil
Rapidly now, without horse power, just steam
Meanwhile Greece was at last free, its struggles
Freeing it from the Ottomans, the dream
Of Byron coming true, though he'd not seen
The great day, but his death was not in vain
To this day the Greeks and Turks both revile
Each other and Cyprus is now the scene
Of a fierce dispute, while others remain
Unlike mosques in Greece, long since smoking piles

Tuesday 6 September 2011

1828 - A classical act

In 1828 Franz Schubert died
The year after Ludwig van Beethoven
Schubert was a relatively young lad
From Vienna, while Ludwig was from Bonn
Though he moved to Vienna later on
Beethoven began as the new Mozart
Child prodigy, influenced by Haydn
The latter also teaching young Schubert
Strangely, these two were both less than forward
With the ladies, neither married, though tried
In Beethoven's case, dismissed as common
By Josephine, his aristo sweetheart
Schubert may have had syphilis, typhoid
Fever possibly, so soon was he gone

1827 - Barbarians from Barbary and elsewhere

Piracy is a serious thing, of course
Even today, Somalis make the news
Each time they rob or kidnap. There were wars
Fought over this in the past. One of those
Was in the time of Barbarossa, close
To Mediterranean ports here and there
Much later France and the USA used
To lose ships and men round about Algiers
And Tripoli. Barbary pirates were
To blame, and so on Africa's north shores
Were trained the guns of navies, and then Charles
The Tenth of France invaded soon after
An Arab chief had struck a Frenchman's face
They stayed for 130 years

Mon 5 Sep

Sunday 4 September 2011

1826 - A rare British win

A humdrum day I suppose, feel a bit
Low on energy and inspiration
So I watched the athletics, saw a Brit
Win the 5,000 metres - what a run,
Mo Farah! Let's hope what he has just done
He can do in next year's Olympics which
(I expect you know) will be in London
Expectation's rising to fever pitch
For that, and less so for England's too-rich
Football team. Yes, it showed some fine spirit
In beating the hapless Bulgarians
But when the finals arrive, will it switch
As usual, to spiritless, gutless shit?
It's better to laugh at than support them

1825 - Cycling in the rain

I told Josie it was raining today
But she was still determined to cycle
But my back tyre's flat, I kept trying to say
These words must all have been inaudible
I have no pump - to ride's impossible
Anyway, before seeing her I bought
A pump from Halfords, and though difficult
Stuck her bike in my car, and soon we'd got
Her saddle raised (her knees were getting caught
On the handlebars - she grows every day)
Drove to my flat where I pumped my tyres full
And off we rode to Salford Quays, tried not
To get wet. A mad dog jumped in my way
And at great speed it headbutted my wheel
Sat 3 Sep 2011

Friday 2 September 2011

1824 - What is to be done, part 47b


In my mind I am as ever struggling
To decide what I should now focus on
I've tried comedy, poetry, writing
Scripts, novels, philosophy, but not one
Of these has borne fruit so far, but there's some
Hope yet maybe from the comedy song,
A niche less competitive, for income
Since it combines all that singly goes wrong
But combined could please various types of throng
Recently I've tried guitar and singing
Though it makes me nervous. To make it fun
Could be the key, could be where I belong
In the realms of spontaneous ad libbing
Combined with rehearsed witty words and tune

1823 - Another venue closes

It's the last night at 'Gigs' - it's closing down
Upstairs from Butterflies, up in Bolton
The scene of many fumbling tries at sound
As well as poems which could come undone
This place is shutting down, these nights are gone
Like summer with its heavy banks of cloud
Today as autumn starts, we got the sun
I predicted the change - of that I'm proud
Tonight I did my Amy song - the crowd
Liked it, I think, though Jeff Dawson, the clown
Disparaged this classic! Fingers and thumbs
Admittedly misbehaved, but that's rude
He winds me up each time, but it's in fun
I hope. He's no great shakes. Still I go on...
Thur 1 Sep 2011