It's too soon to wish a Happy New Year
So instead let's look back on the old one
Twelve months that saw the death of New Labour
And the exile from power of Gordon Brown
The poisoned chalice, post-Blair Number Ten
Did for him, but primarily the lust
For the top job at any price, his sin
The coalition cost the Liberals trust
Nick Clegg's untainted honour's showing rust
Obama's struggling too, though with honour
At least healthcare reforms got through. Iran.
North and South Korea still at peace - just
Afghanistan sputters on as ever
Despite all this, we had a little fun
Friday 31 December 2010
Thursday 30 December 2010
1578 - Lodger, where can you be?
Although I'm generally happy alone
I'm only human and it gets lonely
Mind you, alone's good for getting things done
Like tonight, when writing a song took three
Hours. That could not be done with company
That said, I placed an ad for a lodger
On returning skint from Greece and Turkey
My bank balance red as a tomato
I need the money more than the chatter
I received emails and gave out my phone
Number. Some guys viewed it, well, two or three
But single bed, rough carpet and boiler
Put them off. A girl liked it, but she's gone
With this landlord murderer news story
The story in the news is that her older landlord is suspected of strangling young Bristol architect Joanne Yeates. That'll definitely put off any girls renting the flat, I expect (it needs someone with their own double bed, and she said she was interested, and has her own double bed). But that isn't gonna happen now. So I'm trying to take the positives and make the most of my free time. If one can do that with virtually no spends!
I'm only human and it gets lonely
Mind you, alone's good for getting things done
Like tonight, when writing a song took three
Hours. That could not be done with company
That said, I placed an ad for a lodger
On returning skint from Greece and Turkey
My bank balance red as a tomato
I need the money more than the chatter
I received emails and gave out my phone
Number. Some guys viewed it, well, two or three
But single bed, rough carpet and boiler
Put them off. A girl liked it, but she's gone
With this landlord murderer news story
The story in the news is that her older landlord is suspected of strangling young Bristol architect Joanne Yeates. That'll definitely put off any girls renting the flat, I expect (it needs someone with their own double bed, and she said she was interested, and has her own double bed). But that isn't gonna happen now. So I'm trying to take the positives and make the most of my free time. If one can do that with virtually no spends!
Wednesday 29 December 2010
1577 - Inside the box
Staying dry, saving money, and watching
Film after film, and comedy series
This Happy Breed's on now, The Time Machine
Is coming up, The Omen's on late. These
Are after Gigi (set in Gay Paris)
Leslie Caron is a heavenly girl
And who can resist old smiler Maurice?
And I watched as the Roman Empire fell
Following Alec Guinness' apple
(Poisoned) that set Sophia Loren crying
The Break-Up late last night produced no tears
From me. The Peep Show, that looks watchable
Tonight, and naughty Frankie Boyle's goading
Miranda and Morgana bring hee hee's
Film after film, and comedy series
This Happy Breed's on now, The Time Machine
Is coming up, The Omen's on late. These
Are after Gigi (set in Gay Paris)
Leslie Caron is a heavenly girl
And who can resist old smiler Maurice?
And I watched as the Roman Empire fell
Following Alec Guinness' apple
(Poisoned) that set Sophia Loren crying
The Break-Up late last night produced no tears
From me. The Peep Show, that looks watchable
Tonight, and naughty Frankie Boyle's goading
Miranda and Morgana bring hee hee's
Tuesday 28 December 2010
1576 - Proud and prejudiced
Yesterday I watched all six episodes
Of the great TV dramatisation
Of 'Pride and Prejudice' - the story told
In more detail than shorter film versions
I loved the well-nuanced interaction
Of Darcy, played by Colin Firth, with Liz
But all the while I was in suspension
Waiting until she finally went to his
Place, Pemberley (Lyme Park, it really is -
A place I know well from running off roads
Up and down hills, through woods and back again
But only a few months ago realised
A visit to the hall itself, which shows
Some great views, that lake, and exhibitions)
Of the great TV dramatisation
Of 'Pride and Prejudice' - the story told
In more detail than shorter film versions
I loved the well-nuanced interaction
Of Darcy, played by Colin Firth, with Liz
But all the while I was in suspension
Waiting until she finally went to his
Place, Pemberley (Lyme Park, it really is -
A place I know well from running off roads
Up and down hills, through woods and back again
But only a few months ago realised
A visit to the hall itself, which shows
Some great views, that lake, and exhibitions)
Monday 27 December 2010
1575 - A toast... to toast
Believe it or not, I've had no toaster
Since I moved into this flat years ago
And although I'm not much of a boaster
I now have something about which to crow
My mother had a spare toaster, and so
She offered it to me, and I snatched it
I now have most mod cons, some still to go
But at making toast I can now practise
White, brown or wholemeal, but always thin-sliced
Or else you get no jam on toast, no sir
Instead you get toast jammed in toaster, so
Choose with care down at the supermarket
This is another way to beat frosty
Evenings. They'll fly by with toast, don't you know?
Since I moved into this flat years ago
And although I'm not much of a boaster
I now have something about which to crow
My mother had a spare toaster, and so
She offered it to me, and I snatched it
I now have most mod cons, some still to go
But at making toast I can now practise
White, brown or wholemeal, but always thin-sliced
Or else you get no jam on toast, no sir
Instead you get toast jammed in toaster, so
Choose with care down at the supermarket
This is another way to beat frosty
Evenings. They'll fly by with toast, don't you know?
Sunday 26 December 2010
1574 - De-icing on the cake
It's Boxing Day evening, I'm back at home
It's been a hectic day... Drove from my mum's
Hunching to peek between ice crystals sewn,
It seemed, onto my windscreen, despite tons
Of de-icer spray. As the engine hums
And roars, the ice melts, and I passed Helsby
Turning to see its Christmas card visions
Rooftops of snow, though mainly seventies
Rooftops, cul-de-sacs; wooded hill lofty
A green pudding with a white custard dome
Seen from the M56 with quick turns
Of the head to the right, then back to the
Front, and on to Wilmslow; then we are gone
Me and Josie, Pearl and Louis - what fun!
It's been a hectic day... Drove from my mum's
Hunching to peek between ice crystals sewn,
It seemed, onto my windscreen, despite tons
Of de-icer spray. As the engine hums
And roars, the ice melts, and I passed Helsby
Turning to see its Christmas card visions
Rooftops of snow, though mainly seventies
Rooftops, cul-de-sacs; wooded hill lofty
A green pudding with a white custard dome
Seen from the M56 with quick turns
Of the head to the right, then back to the
Front, and on to Wilmslow; then we are gone
Me and Josie, Pearl and Louis - what fun!
1573 - I'm not dreaming - it is a white Christmas!
Actually it has been a white Christmas
Okay, I don't think it snowed today, but
There was a white covering on the trees
On hedges, lawns, on roofs and chimney-pots
As I drew back the curtains, then I got
A good look at my mum's garden at dawn...
More so than in my flat, this place is hot
(The heating works well). My jumper was shorn
This evening on our return from Gillian
And Kevin's house, where we both nearly froze
But at least they cooked for us, though we brought
Our own trifle. No alcohol's gone down
My neck yet, but a bottle of Baileys
Is in my mum's sideboard... I'll have a bit!
Sat 25 Dec 2010
Okay, I don't think it snowed today, but
There was a white covering on the trees
On hedges, lawns, on roofs and chimney-pots
As I drew back the curtains, then I got
A good look at my mum's garden at dawn...
More so than in my flat, this place is hot
(The heating works well). My jumper was shorn
This evening on our return from Gillian
And Kevin's house, where we both nearly froze
But at least they cooked for us, though we brought
Our own trifle. No alcohol's gone down
My neck yet, but a bottle of Baileys
Is in my mum's sideboard... I'll have a bit!
Sat 25 Dec 2010
Friday 24 December 2010
1572 - Sprouting nonsense
It's Christmas Eve, so I won't write about
The St Bartholomew's Day Massacre
In France in 1572, pout
Though you may, but you had better not, or
No-one will come down your chimney this year
Santa may be no panther - he's panting
And struggling out of bed in his polar
Shed - but, reindeer fed, he'll be departing
For warmer climes (though not much). Snow's falling
This year, so let's be pleased when we look out
Over a crackling red radiator
Look, it's just like all the Christmas paintings!
A snowman's life expectancy's now thought
To be weeks, not days. Say halleluya!
The St Bartholomew's Day Massacre
In France in 1572, pout
Though you may, but you had better not, or
No-one will come down your chimney this year
Santa may be no panther - he's panting
And struggling out of bed in his polar
Shed - but, reindeer fed, he'll be departing
For warmer climes (though not much). Snow's falling
This year, so let's be pleased when we look out
Over a crackling red radiator
Look, it's just like all the Christmas paintings!
A snowman's life expectancy's now thought
To be weeks, not days. Say halleluya!
Thursday 23 December 2010
1571 - The Battle of Lepanto
The year of the Battle of Lepanto
A clash between the Turks and the Christians
At sea, just off the Greek coast, that's thought so
Significant because the shifting sands
Of fortune would now tilt westwards, to lands
Under the cross. The Virgin Mary led
The Spanish commander, the famed Don Juan
To victory, with the Pope's blessing, which led
To a day in her name celebrated
Still by the Church. The deadly Muslim foe
Had lost so many highly-skilled bowmen
That their force was crippled; disunited
However, the West never got to go
Back to Constantinople as they'd planned
A clash between the Turks and the Christians
At sea, just off the Greek coast, that's thought so
Significant because the shifting sands
Of fortune would now tilt westwards, to lands
Under the cross. The Virgin Mary led
The Spanish commander, the famed Don Juan
To victory, with the Pope's blessing, which led
To a day in her name celebrated
Still by the Church. The deadly Muslim foe
Had lost so many highly-skilled bowmen
That their force was crippled; disunited
However, the West never got to go
Back to Constantinople as they'd planned
Wednesday 22 December 2010
1570 - Ivan's terrible legacy
That terrible year 1570
Ivan the Fourth's foul forces of fear fell
Furiously upon Novgorod, where he
Believed he beheld boyars' betrayal
Rich middle classes resisted his rule
Siding with Poland-Lithuania
Made to move from Moscow, Ivan's mental
State scarred, the tsar tormented by Tatars
Striking from south and east, their prisoners
Taken by Khans to Turkish slavery
The Cossacks consequently kept quite well
These hordes from the borders of old Russia
Expansion and firm rule would always be
The goal, after Ivan the Terrible
Ivan the Fourth's foul forces of fear fell
Furiously upon Novgorod, where he
Believed he beheld boyars' betrayal
Rich middle classes resisted his rule
Siding with Poland-Lithuania
Made to move from Moscow, Ivan's mental
State scarred, the tsar tormented by Tatars
Striking from south and east, their prisoners
Taken by Khans to Turkish slavery
The Cossacks consequently kept quite well
These hordes from the borders of old Russia
Expansion and firm rule would always be
The goal, after Ivan the Terrible
Tuesday 21 December 2010
1569 - Magnificent Moguls
A dispossessed prince wandered through the land
Full of frustrated ambition and drive
He left what is now called Uzbekistan
This Mongol prince, Babur, who was derived
From Genghis Khan and Timur Lang. He thrived
In battle, Pashtuns and Hindus and all
Delhi was his till the end of his life
His son Humayun lost some big battles
But regained ground. The empire reached its full
Persian-style grandeur under the wise hand
Of Akbar, third Mogul, with Hindu wife.
Jahangir, Shah Jahan and wife Mahal
And lastly Aurangzeb met the demands
Of ruling India, till Britain, and Clive
NB: I have used the old term 'Mogul' which has been replaced by 'Mughal'
Full of frustrated ambition and drive
He left what is now called Uzbekistan
This Mongol prince, Babur, who was derived
From Genghis Khan and Timur Lang. He thrived
In battle, Pashtuns and Hindus and all
Delhi was his till the end of his life
His son Humayun lost some big battles
But regained ground. The empire reached its full
Persian-style grandeur under the wise hand
Of Akbar, third Mogul, with Hindu wife.
Jahangir, Shah Jahan and wife Mahal
And lastly Aurangzeb met the demands
Of ruling India, till Britain, and Clive
NB: I have used the old term 'Mogul' which has been replaced by 'Mughal'
Monday 20 December 2010
1568 - The future's Orange
There was an old Roman town called Orange
Arausio was its original name
This original Orange in Provence
(Southern France) became a duchy and came
To be linked to another house of fame
The German House of Nassau (in the Rhine-
Land Palatinate) by the usual game
Of judicious marriage. Aged eleven,
The Orange-Nassau lands passed to William
The Silent, son of William the Rich
And this young German noble soon became
Soldier and office-holder, Netherlands
His home from now on, fighting the Spanish
And for the cause of religious freedom
Arausio was its original name
This original Orange in Provence
(Southern France) became a duchy and came
To be linked to another house of fame
The German House of Nassau (in the Rhine-
Land Palatinate) by the usual game
Of judicious marriage. Aged eleven,
The Orange-Nassau lands passed to William
The Silent, son of William the Rich
And this young German noble soon became
Soldier and office-holder, Netherlands
His home from now on, fighting the Spanish
And for the cause of religious freedom
Sunday 19 December 2010
1567 - More about Mary's blokes
In 1567 Lord Darnley died
The husband of Mary, the Queen of Scots
Father of James the Sixth, who would succeed
Elizabeth, the first of the Stuarts
On England's throne, and known as James the First...
Darnley may have wanted his Mary dead
So he could be regent, but he was cursed
To die young; he'd made himself unwanted
By Mary and nobles, and was strangled...
Soon, Mary married a third time, and tied
Herself to the Earl of Bothwell. She'd not
Got the knack of choosing good husbands. Fled
To Norway after Scots nobles allied
Against him. In a Danish prison, rots...
The husband of Mary, the Queen of Scots
Father of James the Sixth, who would succeed
Elizabeth, the first of the Stuarts
On England's throne, and known as James the First...
Darnley may have wanted his Mary dead
So he could be regent, but he was cursed
To die young; he'd made himself unwanted
By Mary and nobles, and was strangled...
Soon, Mary married a third time, and tied
Herself to the Earl of Bothwell. She'd not
Got the knack of choosing good husbands. Fled
To Norway after Scots nobles allied
Against him. In a Danish prison, rots...
Saturday 18 December 2010
1566 - Wirral squirrels
A better day today, despite the snow
Managed to drive along the motorway
Taking Josie to my mum's bungalow
In the pleasant Wirral town of Greasby
Not far from Birkenhead and Wallasey
As you head west from Manchester you find
Less winter ice and snow, invariably
Wirral's near the coast, where the climate's kind
Unlike inland, those bleak moors and Pennines
Bad for the health, and cars can get stuck, so
The west is the best on a winter's day
After this fun day, able to unwind
Paid for my cable, email fixed, good go
On guitar (using a pick) - play away...
Managed to drive along the motorway
Taking Josie to my mum's bungalow
In the pleasant Wirral town of Greasby
Not far from Birkenhead and Wallasey
As you head west from Manchester you find
Less winter ice and snow, invariably
Wirral's near the coast, where the climate's kind
Unlike inland, those bleak moors and Pennines
Bad for the health, and cars can get stuck, so
The west is the best on a winter's day
After this fun day, able to unwind
Paid for my cable, email fixed, good go
On guitar (using a pick) - play away...
Friday 17 December 2010
1565 - Good times, bad times
A successful day balanced by a shit
Evening: my laptop won't connect properly
To the monitor, and my email Out-
Box won't send emails. That happened to me
A month ago. This is like Groundhog Day
Add to this, the disk drive won't play CDs
The sound keeps breaking up; they just won't play
Properly. Now add to that, that my TV
Has bit the dust, the dust it's truly bit
(Unless it's just weather difficulties,
And reception will be restored...) But not
Likely at this rate. I went on e-Bay
But couldn't pay for the cable I'd 'bought'
I won't get it by Christmas now, surely...:(
Evening: my laptop won't connect properly
To the monitor, and my email Out-
Box won't send emails. That happened to me
A month ago. This is like Groundhog Day
Add to this, the disk drive won't play CDs
The sound keeps breaking up; they just won't play
Properly. Now add to that, that my TV
Has bit the dust, the dust it's truly bit
(Unless it's just weather difficulties,
And reception will be restored...) But not
Likely at this rate. I went on e-Bay
But couldn't pay for the cable I'd 'bought'
I won't get it by Christmas now, surely...:(
Thursday 16 December 2010
No comment
Boo hoo - I dunno why but the comment box is inoperative at the moment for me - I'm glad to see others can still enter comments. But the upshot is I can't reply to them at the moment. I do enjoy reading them, though, so pleeeeeeeeeeeeeeease keep commenting, or at least reading them.
One positive thing I've noticed recently to offset the above negative thing - balance, yin and yang, yada yada - is that when I Google 'Antonionioni' it no longer thinks I've mistyped 'Antonioni' but offers Antonionioni as an option to go straight into. In fact not only that, but on choosing the offered option, top of the websites list was this website - so thanks to my peeps, to my kru, to my homies wot have kept on readin me stuff, like.
PS - I may not be able to post for a few days - I'm not sure when I'm getting my laptop back off my mate who's reinstalling everything for me after wiping the dodgy fake program that a charlatanic, satanic, pusillanic b'stard put on there after charging me 80 smackeroonies. I will return when the bluebirds fly once more over Salford...
Hasta la (Windows) vista, babies...
One positive thing I've noticed recently to offset the above negative thing - balance, yin and yang, yada yada - is that when I Google 'Antonionioni' it no longer thinks I've mistyped 'Antonioni' but offers Antonionioni as an option to go straight into. In fact not only that, but on choosing the offered option, top of the websites list was this website - so thanks to my peeps, to my kru, to my homies wot have kept on readin me stuff, like.
PS - I may not be able to post for a few days - I'm not sure when I'm getting my laptop back off my mate who's reinstalling everything for me after wiping the dodgy fake program that a charlatanic, satanic, pusillanic b'stard put on there after charging me 80 smackeroonies. I will return when the bluebirds fly once more over Salford...
Hasta la (Windows) vista, babies...
1564 - Below Cloud 23
Last night's office bash was not noteworthy
Only for going up the Hilton Tower
It began long before, but not early
Enough, because a party from the floor
Above us - the legal team - had got there
A few minutes before us, and got served
First, making us wait. That's lawyers for ya!
The quantity of food? Well, we deserved
More, frankly. Extra veg was brought, which curved
Our stomachs more satisfactorily
We stayed at The Bridge for another hour
Then the Ape & Apple, though it unnerved
With its roughness the girls in our party
That's why we next went up the Hilton Tower!
Only for going up the Hilton Tower
It began long before, but not early
Enough, because a party from the floor
Above us - the legal team - had got there
A few minutes before us, and got served
First, making us wait. That's lawyers for ya!
The quantity of food? Well, we deserved
More, frankly. Extra veg was brought, which curved
Our stomachs more satisfactorily
We stayed at The Bridge for another hour
Then the Ape & Apple, though it unnerved
With its roughness the girls in our party
That's why we next went up the Hilton Tower!
1563 - The view from Cloud 23
Tonight I went up the Hilton Hotel
The tallest building in all Manchester
Some overpriced drinks, a view of, oh well
Stretford, Salford, it all looks great from floor
23 ('Cloud 23') We all saw
Street lights that could be Stoke, Liverpool, Leeds
I was underwhelmed as drink prices soared
Yes, I remained on the ground when I read
Those drinks prices. Despite all this, we had
A good time up in the Hilton Hotel
The tallest building in all Manchester
A tower you see from wherever you're led
A sliver of glass, a viewpoint of, well
Not that much really - it's just Manchester
Wed 15 Dec - written while very drunk.
The tallest building in all Manchester
Some overpriced drinks, a view of, oh well
Stretford, Salford, it all looks great from floor
23 ('Cloud 23') We all saw
Street lights that could be Stoke, Liverpool, Leeds
I was underwhelmed as drink prices soared
Yes, I remained on the ground when I read
Those drinks prices. Despite all this, we had
A good time up in the Hilton Hotel
The tallest building in all Manchester
A tower you see from wherever you're led
A sliver of glass, a viewpoint of, well
Not that much really - it's just Manchester
Wed 15 Dec - written while very drunk.
Tuesday 14 December 2010
1562 - Marking your card
I've still not written or posted my cards
I'm running out of time to post them now
Each day I bring them into work but can't
Find time to write them; work just won't allow
Oh Christmas cards, oh Christmas cards, just how
Will they get sent off in time to my kin?
Though I've not yet quite got a furrowed brow
At a low level, it's quite worryin'...
Mind you, when will MY cards start arrivin'?
Are they waitin' to get theirs first? Bastards!
If so, maybe I won't send them. That cow
Of a sister; that brother, he's a swine
And as for my mother, I've no regards
Sod them all, and sod Christmas. Sod you, too!
I'm running out of time to post them now
Each day I bring them into work but can't
Find time to write them; work just won't allow
Oh Christmas cards, oh Christmas cards, just how
Will they get sent off in time to my kin?
Though I've not yet quite got a furrowed brow
At a low level, it's quite worryin'...
Mind you, when will MY cards start arrivin'?
Are they waitin' to get theirs first? Bastards!
If so, maybe I won't send them. That cow
Of a sister; that brother, he's a swine
And as for my mother, I've no regards
Sod them all, and sod Christmas. Sod you, too!
Monday 13 December 2010
WARNING - DANGER, HIGH VOLTAGE!
Actually, there is very low risk of high voltage, and high risk of low voltage. But this is, nevertheless, a warning!
(A warning of what?)
Oh yeah, of course, I forgot what to warn you about! Doh, ha ha ha, what a doughnut. I'd forget me 'ead if it weren't screwed on, ha ha. What it's about ... is... just to let you know that I have lent me computer to this geezer what's fixin it for me - allegedly, ha ha - an I'm sans computer, comme ils disent en France, till the bleeder gives it me back. IF ee gives it me back, that is. But if ee don't, ee'll wake up wiv is 'and transfixed to a bleedin snooker table. Wiv a knife. That's the way we do fings round ere, gorblimey Charlie.
But I'm sure ee won't let me dahn. Ee's a diamond geezer. Nah, I don't mean ee works in the diamond industry do I, yer doughnut. It's just an East End expression, like Delboy and the Old Vic, sorry, the Queen Vic.
So I might not be able ter post me blog every day on time, an even when I do, like today (from work) , for some reason I can't post comments on uvver peeps' stuff. So don't be offended. Antionionioni and the Onioni gang are right behind yers all the way to the bottom of the alley.
Now gertcha and do sumfink useful, awroit?
(A warning of what?)
Oh yeah, of course, I forgot what to warn you about! Doh, ha ha ha, what a doughnut. I'd forget me 'ead if it weren't screwed on, ha ha. What it's about ... is... just to let you know that I have lent me computer to this geezer what's fixin it for me - allegedly, ha ha - an I'm sans computer, comme ils disent en France, till the bleeder gives it me back. IF ee gives it me back, that is. But if ee don't, ee'll wake up wiv is 'and transfixed to a bleedin snooker table. Wiv a knife. That's the way we do fings round ere, gorblimey Charlie.
But I'm sure ee won't let me dahn. Ee's a diamond geezer. Nah, I don't mean ee works in the diamond industry do I, yer doughnut. It's just an East End expression, like Delboy and the Old Vic, sorry, the Queen Vic.
So I might not be able ter post me blog every day on time, an even when I do, like today (from work) , for some reason I can't post comments on uvver peeps' stuff. So don't be offended. Antionionioni and the Onioni gang are right behind yers all the way to the bottom of the alley.
Now gertcha and do sumfink useful, awroit?
1561 - Laptopland, where the e-elves live
My laptop has been given to a friend
He's gonna fix it, put right what went wrong
He's gonna do his very best to mend
The mess made of it by that stupid schlong
In Salford, whose number I'd obtained from
The Yellow Pages, but who messed it up
Computers are like cars; depend upon
Someone to fix them, and they'll cock it up
Or rip you off as well as screw it up
My flat tyre waits for me; I'll have to spend
Precious December spondoolicks on one
New tyre: cost, 40 quid at Kwik Fit. Stop
This money-wasting! Gotta reach the end
Of the year solvent, when Auld Lang Syne's sung
He's gonna fix it, put right what went wrong
He's gonna do his very best to mend
The mess made of it by that stupid schlong
In Salford, whose number I'd obtained from
The Yellow Pages, but who messed it up
Computers are like cars; depend upon
Someone to fix them, and they'll cock it up
Or rip you off as well as screw it up
My flat tyre waits for me; I'll have to spend
Precious December spondoolicks on one
New tyre: cost, 40 quid at Kwik Fit. Stop
This money-wasting! Gotta reach the end
Of the year solvent, when Auld Lang Syne's sung
Sunday 12 December 2010
1560 - Out, damned Scot!
I'm looking forward to watching Macbeth
Tonight on TV, with Patrick Stewart...
A Scottish theme pervades, I must confess
The year 1560 and this sonnet
Shakespeare was not yet to be, and so yet
To pen that drama of the northern land
But that year saw Scotland turn Protestant
And the French were shown the door by England
Aided by the death of the Frenchwoman
Mary of Guise, unlucky with the deaths
Of four children, leaving Mary Stuart
(Queen of Scots) sole heiress, but on her own
The Auld Alliance with France worth much less
And Francis the Second in his casket
Mary Queen of Scots' parents had contracted a great marriage with the son and heir of Francis I, the great French rival of Henry VIII (who had died a few years earlier). This seemed likely to keep Scotland independent from England by close union at royal level with France, potentially even leading to a French takeover of Scotland and, ultimately, England. However, after Francis I's death, Francis II - Mary Queen of Scots' young husband - did not live long, and consequently his mother, Catherine de Medicis, became regent until the nine-year-old Charles IX could take over the reins of power in France.
Tonight on TV, with Patrick Stewart...
A Scottish theme pervades, I must confess
The year 1560 and this sonnet
Shakespeare was not yet to be, and so yet
To pen that drama of the northern land
But that year saw Scotland turn Protestant
And the French were shown the door by England
Aided by the death of the Frenchwoman
Mary of Guise, unlucky with the deaths
Of four children, leaving Mary Stuart
(Queen of Scots) sole heiress, but on her own
The Auld Alliance with France worth much less
And Francis the Second in his casket
Mary Queen of Scots' parents had contracted a great marriage with the son and heir of Francis I, the great French rival of Henry VIII (who had died a few years earlier). This seemed likely to keep Scotland independent from England by close union at royal level with France, potentially even leading to a French takeover of Scotland and, ultimately, England. However, after Francis I's death, Francis II - Mary Queen of Scots' young husband - did not live long, and consequently his mother, Catherine de Medicis, became regent until the nine-year-old Charles IX could take over the reins of power in France.
Saturday 11 December 2010
1559 - Dr Do Little
Been a long day, already half-past eight
What shall I do? Not sure, perhaps I'll read
Watch TV, or why not even try to write?
No, think I'll write tomorrow, after bed
Has refreshed me sufficiently. The head
Is clearer in the morning or the noon
And better words are written, thoughts are sped
Around the searching brain, more linking done
Between this and that. Late nights are for fun
Or relaxation. Let the body wait
And the mind is the body. Soften tread
Sit on the sofa, don't get off your bum
Except when needing to visit toilet
Let life go by for now and plant no seed
What shall I do? Not sure, perhaps I'll read
Watch TV, or why not even try to write?
No, think I'll write tomorrow, after bed
Has refreshed me sufficiently. The head
Is clearer in the morning or the noon
And better words are written, thoughts are sped
Around the searching brain, more linking done
Between this and that. Late nights are for fun
Or relaxation. Let the body wait
And the mind is the body. Soften tread
Sit on the sofa, don't get off your bum
Except when needing to visit toilet
Let life go by for now and plant no seed
1558 - Virgin on the ridiculous
In 1558 Elizabeth
Began her reign in time of great turmoil
Placed on that dangerous throne after the death
Of elder sister Mary. This curtailed
The often bloody attempt to recall
England to Catholic ways; the Church was free
From the dictates of Rome; the powerful
Nobles and merchants would prefer to be
Left alone to follow their liberty
Of conscience and commerce; the trend was set
Which has continued and spread from this soil
To others, thanks to those in Germany
Religious war was short-lived, and the heat
Against the crown would simmer, not yet boil
Began her reign in time of great turmoil
Placed on that dangerous throne after the death
Of elder sister Mary. This curtailed
The often bloody attempt to recall
England to Catholic ways; the Church was free
From the dictates of Rome; the powerful
Nobles and merchants would prefer to be
Left alone to follow their liberty
Of conscience and commerce; the trend was set
Which has continued and spread from this soil
To others, thanks to those in Germany
Religious war was short-lived, and the heat
Against the crown would simmer, not yet boil
Thursday 9 December 2010
1557 - Germany calling
There's been a season of programmes lately
On the TV all about Germany
I've missed many but I've seen two or three
The scenic walks of Julia Bradbury
Up the Rhine, and to Neuschwanstein lastly
While pub landlord comedian Al Murray
Has travelled by car, therefore more widely
Past snowy mountains, forests of fir tree...
Frederick the Great, Ludwig's insanity
Lots of Wagner, complete with valkyries
Less Goethe, Schiller, Nietzsche; literary
Men perhaps rather dull for BBC
In-depth treatment. The main effect on me
Is that I'd like to go there presently
On the TV all about Germany
I've missed many but I've seen two or three
The scenic walks of Julia Bradbury
Up the Rhine, and to Neuschwanstein lastly
While pub landlord comedian Al Murray
Has travelled by car, therefore more widely
Past snowy mountains, forests of fir tree...
Frederick the Great, Ludwig's insanity
Lots of Wagner, complete with valkyries
Less Goethe, Schiller, Nietzsche; literary
Men perhaps rather dull for BBC
In-depth treatment. The main effect on me
Is that I'd like to go there presently
Wednesday 8 December 2010
1556 - Jack Lennon in 'The Odd Couple'
John Lennon blah blah, we worship him still
He could sing and write good catchphrase lyrics
But McCartney is almost the devil
No airports named after him, and less myths
I feel sorry for Paul. John's politics
Such as they were, take precedence over
Paul's musical genius, yes, mere music's
Not as sexy, it seems, as camera-
Loving publicity stunts; a poser
And egomaniac; while the Fab Four filled
Theatres and stadiums, the harmonies clicked
But given time and space, Lennon declared
Declaimed, condemned, abstained, rejected, till
The Fab Four were no more, with Paul eclipsed
He could sing and write good catchphrase lyrics
But McCartney is almost the devil
No airports named after him, and less myths
I feel sorry for Paul. John's politics
Such as they were, take precedence over
Paul's musical genius, yes, mere music's
Not as sexy, it seems, as camera-
Loving publicity stunts; a poser
And egomaniac; while the Fab Four filled
Theatres and stadiums, the harmonies clicked
But given time and space, Lennon declared
Declaimed, condemned, abstained, rejected, till
The Fab Four were no more, with Paul eclipsed
1555 - Antonionioni on Antonioni
Antonionioni pays respects
To film producer Antonioni -
The inspiration for my name; that ex-
tra 'oni' on the end is quite funny
To me (only). Watched 'Blowup' - a really
Entertaining and amusing picture
Also very historical; we see
Mid-sixties London grow up, skyscrapers
(By English standards), and architecture
Of earlier times groovily painted. Sex
Is not absent, unsatisfactory
Though it may be; frustrating, immature
Insincere, dangerous. Image reflects
Uncertainty, always uncertainty
To film producer Antonioni -
The inspiration for my name; that ex-
tra 'oni' on the end is quite funny
To me (only). Watched 'Blowup' - a really
Entertaining and amusing picture
Also very historical; we see
Mid-sixties London grow up, skyscrapers
(By English standards), and architecture
Of earlier times groovily painted. Sex
Is not absent, unsatisfactory
Though it may be; frustrating, immature
Insincere, dangerous. Image reflects
Uncertainty, always uncertainty
Tuesday 7 December 2010
1554 - Late night thoughts
I'm tired and drunk, it's two in the morning
I've popped a hot water bottle in bed
And now, though so late, before retiring,
I am by sonnetary duty led
I have to write fourteen lines from my head
Though it's barely functioning, it is screwed
Back from Liverpool, where I had been led
To the Academy, musical food
Served up by Electric Six, though not crewed
By the original line-up. Taking
Me back to Manchester, the train then fed
Me to an extremely cold night. I moved
As quickly as I could through the shopping
Centre, now closed, heading towards Salford
I've popped a hot water bottle in bed
And now, though so late, before retiring,
I am by sonnetary duty led
I have to write fourteen lines from my head
Though it's barely functioning, it is screwed
Back from Liverpool, where I had been led
To the Academy, musical food
Served up by Electric Six, though not crewed
By the original line-up. Taking
Me back to Manchester, the train then fed
Me to an extremely cold night. I moved
As quickly as I could through the shopping
Centre, now closed, heading towards Salford
Sunday 5 December 2010
1553 - One Bloody Mary, please
In 1553, young Edward the
Sixth's sickening, slipping away to die
So quickly after his father, Henry
The Eighth, departed, fat and unhealthy
This course of events, of course let Mary
Onto the throne; like Edward, a sickly
Child. Edward's will was Queen Lady Jane Grey
Protestant, related to the family
Tudor, and beautiful, unlike Mary
Whose mother Catherine's fertility
Was somewhat suspect in its quality
Mary however was not unwary
Of slurs on her mother church ancestry
And set about being Bloody Mary
Sixth's sickening, slipping away to die
So quickly after his father, Henry
The Eighth, departed, fat and unhealthy
This course of events, of course let Mary
Onto the throne; like Edward, a sickly
Child. Edward's will was Queen Lady Jane Grey
Protestant, related to the family
Tudor, and beautiful, unlike Mary
Whose mother Catherine's fertility
Was somewhat suspect in its quality
Mary however was not unwary
Of slurs on her mother church ancestry
And set about being Bloody Mary
Saturday 4 December 2010
1552 - Thoughts of a typist, sorry, writer
A rare day spent on writing poetry
Rewriting two poems; they weren't first drafts
I posted one of them for folk to see
On Write Out Loud, where I hoped to attract
A few comments and I have, so that's that
I have the other one still up my sleeve...
Yesterday, while at work, engaged in chat
With a pal in Newcastle, I conceived
An idea for a novel, play, even
About a comedian misanthrope
Although he's nasty, I'll play it for laughs
Funny's better than serious, I believe
This guy has no sense of humour, you see
Until he writes it down, becomes relaxed
Rewriting two poems; they weren't first drafts
I posted one of them for folk to see
On Write Out Loud, where I hoped to attract
A few comments and I have, so that's that
I have the other one still up my sleeve...
Yesterday, while at work, engaged in chat
With a pal in Newcastle, I conceived
An idea for a novel, play, even
About a comedian misanthrope
Although he's nasty, I'll play it for laughs
Funny's better than serious, I believe
This guy has no sense of humour, you see
Until he writes it down, becomes relaxed
Friday 3 December 2010
1551 - Keep the home radiators burning
It's so cold in the flat I need some gloves
A scarf, maybe a hot water bottle
A roaring fire - hey, give those logs a shove
With this brass poker, open a bottle
Of whisky, some toast, a cigar. Battle
Against the cold, the dying of the light
Switch over from news reports of struggles
In snow, drift over to sunny and bright
Holiday ads; watch Peter O'Toole's white
Robes flapping in the desert as dunes move
In scorching winds that blister and mottle
A pale face, camels racing to the fight
Listen to Oasis, listen to Love
Or the Beach Boys to melt those ice crystals
PS - I mention Oasis purely because of their name!
A scarf, maybe a hot water bottle
A roaring fire - hey, give those logs a shove
With this brass poker, open a bottle
Of whisky, some toast, a cigar. Battle
Against the cold, the dying of the light
Switch over from news reports of struggles
In snow, drift over to sunny and bright
Holiday ads; watch Peter O'Toole's white
Robes flapping in the desert as dunes move
In scorching winds that blister and mottle
A pale face, camels racing to the fight
Listen to Oasis, listen to Love
Or the Beach Boys to melt those ice crystals
PS - I mention Oasis purely because of their name!
Thursday 2 December 2010
1550 - The big chill
It's cold it's cold it's brass monkeys big chill
Could be as cold as '63 or worse
The year I was born we went through the mill
Although I like the snow, I must confess
Let's look on the bright side in all of this
Global warming may not be after all
As hot an issue as it appeared last
Year or last decade. As temperatures fall
Let's feel secure, let's feel comfortable
In the frozen north. Shivering has appeal
Compared to desertification. This
Means the Sahara won't now spread its thrall
To Italy, to southern France. I will
Celebrate such seasonal differences
Could be as cold as '63 or worse
The year I was born we went through the mill
Although I like the snow, I must confess
Let's look on the bright side in all of this
Global warming may not be after all
As hot an issue as it appeared last
Year or last decade. As temperatures fall
Let's feel secure, let's feel comfortable
In the frozen north. Shivering has appeal
Compared to desertification. This
Means the Sahara won't now spread its thrall
To Italy, to southern France. I will
Celebrate such seasonal differences
Wednesday 1 December 2010
1549 - Partly-articulated arctic art
As daylight fades and snowflakes fall more slow
I recall this morning's journey from hell
Or was it to hell and back, I don't know
Truthfully, though, an early rise is all
I panic at - satanic alarm bell -
Naught else Dante-esque about today's trip
In my eyes. Though the skies rained snow, it's all
Great fun to this big kid. The car might slip
And slide in rush hour rush, might even flip
In the slush, but who cares? I had to go
To Wilmslow to pick up Josie, then crawl
As time flew, or like drops of water dripped,
In queues of cars, then on the buses, so
My girl could take her piano test. Did well!!!
I recall this morning's journey from hell
Or was it to hell and back, I don't know
Truthfully, though, an early rise is all
I panic at - satanic alarm bell -
Naught else Dante-esque about today's trip
In my eyes. Though the skies rained snow, it's all
Great fun to this big kid. The car might slip
And slide in rush hour rush, might even flip
In the slush, but who cares? I had to go
To Wilmslow to pick up Josie, then crawl
As time flew, or like drops of water dripped,
In queues of cars, then on the buses, so
My girl could take her piano test. Did well!!!
Tuesday 30 November 2010
1548 - Sole survivor
Snow fell during the night; I walked to work
With headphones on, lost in a world of soul
The cold blue sky both overhead and perk
My shoe upper's departing from its sole
Work is so preferable to the dole
People to chat to, computers as toys
A sense of purpose, paid to play a role
Meetings of verbal diarrhoea noise
During which I tap the chair, sip strange teas
Tasting of licorice, fantasies dark
And rich trip my tongue, wistful dreams that stole
Away down my throat, though I kept my poise
A Christmas meal not of turkey but duck
I think I'll plump for. What a radical!
With headphones on, lost in a world of soul
The cold blue sky both overhead and perk
My shoe upper's departing from its sole
Work is so preferable to the dole
People to chat to, computers as toys
A sense of purpose, paid to play a role
Meetings of verbal diarrhoea noise
During which I tap the chair, sip strange teas
Tasting of licorice, fantasies dark
And rich trip my tongue, wistful dreams that stole
Away down my throat, though I kept my poise
A Christmas meal not of turkey but duck
I think I'll plump for. What a radical!
1547 - The car thief
Tonight, a trip out west to the Wirral
Peninsula, for a poetry night
In the Moreton Arms, free buffet and all
And cash prizes, but things didn't go right
I ran out of time, unable to quite
Finish the second poem; didn't win
But at least many there were quite polite
About my stuff, so that was consoling
As you know, the weather has been freezing
I couldn't unlock the car; nearly called
The RAC. Andy's face full of fright
The barman brought a kettle, tried pouring
Hot water on the doors to no avail
Cos my car was two cars down to the right!
Sad but true - I was trying to break into someone else's dark red Fiesta! Doh! I got called a doughnut, and I merited the description.
Peninsula, for a poetry night
In the Moreton Arms, free buffet and all
And cash prizes, but things didn't go right
I ran out of time, unable to quite
Finish the second poem; didn't win
But at least many there were quite polite
About my stuff, so that was consoling
As you know, the weather has been freezing
I couldn't unlock the car; nearly called
The RAC. Andy's face full of fright
The barman brought a kettle, tried pouring
Hot water on the doors to no avail
Cos my car was two cars down to the right!
Sad but true - I was trying to break into someone else's dark red Fiesta! Doh! I got called a doughnut, and I merited the description.
Sunday 28 November 2010
1546 - News from the North West
I've never seen the film, North By Northwest
Or even Vertigo, both by Hitchcock
I must surely stand out from all the rest
For not having seen Rear Window, all blocks
To my omniscient goal. But wait - the box -
Specifically Film Four - is now showing
The first of those three all-time classic flicks
OK, the plot and dialogue's creaking
Like my old mattress every year; speaking
Of beds, the French guy didn't look impressed
With the spare room's single bed; and so it looks
Like another no-go in my renting
Attempts. Still, when payday comes, I'll invest
Fifteen more quid in an ad. Wish me luck!
Or even Vertigo, both by Hitchcock
I must surely stand out from all the rest
For not having seen Rear Window, all blocks
To my omniscient goal. But wait - the box -
Specifically Film Four - is now showing
The first of those three all-time classic flicks
OK, the plot and dialogue's creaking
Like my old mattress every year; speaking
Of beds, the French guy didn't look impressed
With the spare room's single bed; and so it looks
Like another no-go in my renting
Attempts. Still, when payday comes, I'll invest
Fifteen more quid in an ad. Wish me luck!
Saturday 27 November 2010
1545 - Mozartchester
A lovely day, though we missed the skating
We ate some grub at Essy's beforehand
A quick trip to the museum; shopping
In Oklahoma; Josie got her hands
On a pink squidgey ball; chocolate cake, and
Then the Bridgewater Hall with Pearl; Mozart
Was the main draw, his Requiem still sounds
Special, especially as he died before this art
Was finished; his pupils built on his start
Dies Irae and Confutatis wings
Of fire, the choir not pouring any sand
On the flames of passion. We loved the heart
On sleeve conductor, bellowing, jumping
With long hair and shiny shoes on the stand
We ate some grub at Essy's beforehand
A quick trip to the museum; shopping
In Oklahoma; Josie got her hands
On a pink squidgey ball; chocolate cake, and
Then the Bridgewater Hall with Pearl; Mozart
Was the main draw, his Requiem still sounds
Special, especially as he died before this art
Was finished; his pupils built on his start
Dies Irae and Confutatis wings
Of fire, the choir not pouring any sand
On the flames of passion. We loved the heart
On sleeve conductor, bellowing, jumping
With long hair and shiny shoes on the stand
1544 - So cool in Liverpool
I've just had a night out in Liverpool
The venue was a place on Mathew Street
Tonight's temperature was extremely cool
But music filled the home of Merseybeat
I even saw some coppers on the beat
Question a thief who tried to sell to me
Some stolen perfume. Paco Rabanne. Heat
Was put on him; he had to drunkenly
Search for a non-existent receipt. See,
Cliches can come true. I could only drool
At the guitar skills at this gig tonight
Jo Bywater and Jon Gomm; mastery!
Not so keen on the piano-playing girl
Though. Her syrupy songs just did not fit
The venue was a place on Mathew Street
Tonight's temperature was extremely cool
But music filled the home of Merseybeat
I even saw some coppers on the beat
Question a thief who tried to sell to me
Some stolen perfume. Paco Rabanne. Heat
Was put on him; he had to drunkenly
Search for a non-existent receipt. See,
Cliches can come true. I could only drool
At the guitar skills at this gig tonight
Jo Bywater and Jon Gomm; mastery!
Not so keen on the piano-playing girl
Though. Her syrupy songs just did not fit
Thursday 25 November 2010
1543 - Three minute meditation
Nothing much has happened and it's late
So this is a quick silly one today
It's cold and the door's open, and the weight
Of time and circumstance really does weigh
Heavy on us all, so much so we pray
To the tooth fairy and to Santa Claus
That we will get something good soon when they -
Whoever they are - put their generous paws
On some decent gifts for us. Then, applause
Will come their way, for are we not ingrates
Unless we get more than our fair share. Play
Should be fair, but fairest of all to us
We want abundance placed upon our plate
And we want happiness and joy to stay
So this is a quick silly one today
It's cold and the door's open, and the weight
Of time and circumstance really does weigh
Heavy on us all, so much so we pray
To the tooth fairy and to Santa Claus
That we will get something good soon when they -
Whoever they are - put their generous paws
On some decent gifts for us. Then, applause
Will come their way, for are we not ingrates
Unless we get more than our fair share. Play
Should be fair, but fairest of all to us
We want abundance placed upon our plate
And we want happiness and joy to stay
Wednesday 24 November 2010
1542 - Student hopes and slippery slopes
The students they are rioting again
Like we did in the eighties; like they did
In the fifties, sixties, seventies, when
They fought the Bomb, the Man, 'Nam; never hid
From truncheons. They punched their weight, and now lead
The media, still right on all the way
Tuition fees go on rising; they feed
This French-style frenzy. Not Champs Elysees
In '68, but, all these years on, they
Show the same young excitement as back then
Meanwhile, the snow is almost here; we'll slide
We'll slip and trip, we'll skate through slush and spray
We'll ski down each hillside, glide down each glen
Break limbs, lie groaning in hospital beds
Like we did in the eighties; like they did
In the fifties, sixties, seventies, when
They fought the Bomb, the Man, 'Nam; never hid
From truncheons. They punched their weight, and now lead
The media, still right on all the way
Tuition fees go on rising; they feed
This French-style frenzy. Not Champs Elysees
In '68, but, all these years on, they
Show the same young excitement as back then
Meanwhile, the snow is almost here; we'll slide
We'll slip and trip, we'll skate through slush and spray
We'll ski down each hillside, glide down each glen
Break limbs, lie groaning in hospital beds
Tuesday 23 November 2010
1541 - Pendolino pending
Oh bugger! The business meeting is done
But at Euston I've got to wait an hour
And a half for a particular train
To take me back to Manchester. Bugger!
Still, the consolation is my work hours
Will be more than ten, so tomorrow I
Can have a short day. Wait! I remember
I left early yesterday. Oh well, by
Today's end, yesterday is history
I wonder will that friendly Italian
Ring to say yes or no about the spare
Room that's to let? A guy called James might see
The room tomorrow evening when work's done...
I'll advertise until there's a taker
But at Euston I've got to wait an hour
And a half for a particular train
To take me back to Manchester. Bugger!
Still, the consolation is my work hours
Will be more than ten, so tomorrow I
Can have a short day. Wait! I remember
I left early yesterday. Oh well, by
Today's end, yesterday is history
I wonder will that friendly Italian
Ring to say yes or no about the spare
Room that's to let? A guy called James might see
The room tomorrow evening when work's done...
I'll advertise until there's a taker
Monday 22 November 2010
1540 - Purple people
I'm watching 'Ancient Worlds' - the Iron Age
Replaces the too-fragile Bronze era
Once-great cities overrun by rampage
Sheer numbers overwhelming defenders
A period of regression, although the
Phoenicians and Egyptians carried on
As best they could, especially the former
Who sailed the seas, commercially driven
From great ports like Byblos, Tyre and Sidon
For neighbour Jews, Solomon's Golden Age
Was not so great; the Assyrian terror
Deporting Israel's tribes. Jerusalem
In southern Judah, spared, became the stage
For future centuries of great drama
'Purple people' is the translation of 'Phoenicians' - taken from their famous purple dye.
Replaces the too-fragile Bronze era
Once-great cities overrun by rampage
Sheer numbers overwhelming defenders
A period of regression, although the
Phoenicians and Egyptians carried on
As best they could, especially the former
Who sailed the seas, commercially driven
From great ports like Byblos, Tyre and Sidon
For neighbour Jews, Solomon's Golden Age
Was not so great; the Assyrian terror
Deporting Israel's tribes. Jerusalem
In southern Judah, spared, became the stage
For future centuries of great drama
'Purple people' is the translation of 'Phoenicians' - taken from their famous purple dye.
Sunday 21 November 2010
1539 - The Italian nut job
A very odd event happened today
I placed an advert for my flat online
I got some emails and replied, so they
Had my mobile phone number. Some declined
To ring, but others did - three men took time
To make enquiries (all of them foreign)
One of them texted later (changed his mind)
Another didn't turn up for viewing
But the third one was the really strange one
He said he was Italian, and by day
Was a trainee chef at college; tea-time
He worked in a posh city restaurant
All untrue - when I went there, there's no way
The staff had heard of him. He had been lying!
I placed an advert for my flat online
I got some emails and replied, so they
Had my mobile phone number. Some declined
To ring, but others did - three men took time
To make enquiries (all of them foreign)
One of them texted later (changed his mind)
Another didn't turn up for viewing
But the third one was the really strange one
He said he was Italian, and by day
Was a trainee chef at college; tea-time
He worked in a posh city restaurant
All untrue - when I went there, there's no way
The staff had heard of him. He had been lying!
Saturday 20 November 2010
1538 - New ice age
A second Saturday we went skating
This time it went dark as we went around
The rink. 'Rink a rink a roses' singing
And maybe 'Ice Ice Baby' too, the sound;
Skate Bush was playing, and I also found
Foreigner's 'Cold As Ice' quite nice to hum
We got there by bicicle, wheels went round
We were late so got our skates on for some
Slippery fun, not falling on our bums
At all, no falls, but oh, some near missing
Blades hissing and listening to my heart pound
Before that I ate duck in sauce of plum
In Cafe Rouge - it's handy for eating
On Saturdays when we are skating-bound
This time it went dark as we went around
The rink. 'Rink a rink a roses' singing
And maybe 'Ice Ice Baby' too, the sound;
Skate Bush was playing, and I also found
Foreigner's 'Cold As Ice' quite nice to hum
We got there by bicicle, wheels went round
We were late so got our skates on for some
Slippery fun, not falling on our bums
At all, no falls, but oh, some near missing
Blades hissing and listening to my heart pound
Before that I ate duck in sauce of plum
In Cafe Rouge - it's handy for eating
On Saturdays when we are skating-bound
Friday 19 November 2010
1537 - Set the controls for the heart
I'm looking for a lodger, is there one
Out there? They say the market's opportune
I've spent too much, I need to get some in
So I can have a life, preferably soon
And also pay the mortgage. Debts are strewn
All around. Does it matter? No, but love
Is not, and that does. Life seems to be hewn
From the rock of the heart; it's from above
We accept what we're told, though there's no proof
The best god that I've seen yet is the sun
The original and the best; the moon
Is a newcomer, a pretender. Move
Back to the source; the battle will be won
Though no-one will thank you for what you're doing
Out there? They say the market's opportune
I've spent too much, I need to get some in
So I can have a life, preferably soon
And also pay the mortgage. Debts are strewn
All around. Does it matter? No, but love
Is not, and that does. Life seems to be hewn
From the rock of the heart; it's from above
We accept what we're told, though there's no proof
The best god that I've seen yet is the sun
The original and the best; the moon
Is a newcomer, a pretender. Move
Back to the source; the battle will be won
Though no-one will thank you for what you're doing
Thursday 18 November 2010
1536 - The debt of the Irish
The news today has been about Ireland
A great place with fun people, simple food
And lots of rain which makes it green, and grand
(A word they use quite often.) But a rude
Awakening has shaken and pursued
Them down each quiet lane to each big house
Recently built in the good times which threw
Droplets of silver from the sky. It throws
Just rain again now, since it's been disclosed
That Ireland's debt has got well out of hand
And belts have been tightened so much, they're glued
In place painfully. The deficit grows
To Greek levels. The Eurocrats had planned
Monetary union. Was that idea flawed?
A great place with fun people, simple food
And lots of rain which makes it green, and grand
(A word they use quite often.) But a rude
Awakening has shaken and pursued
Them down each quiet lane to each big house
Recently built in the good times which threw
Droplets of silver from the sky. It throws
Just rain again now, since it's been disclosed
That Ireland's debt has got well out of hand
And belts have been tightened so much, they're glued
In place painfully. The deficit grows
To Greek levels. The Eurocrats had planned
Monetary union. Was that idea flawed?
1535 - That was a very good, and bad, year
What a time it was then to be alive
The Renaissance and world exploration
The year was AD 1535
Thomas More executed for treason
For not agreeing to the split with Rome
The first English language Bible printed
Tyndale and Coverdale - hey boys, well done
Meanwhile, in Germany, they defeated
The Munster Anabaptists, kept the lid
On that rebellious brew. Peru was live
Over in South America, as one
Francisco Pizarro that year founded
Lima, which of course subsequently thrived
Unlike the Inca, who faced perdition
Wed 17 Oct
The Renaissance and world exploration
The year was AD 1535
Thomas More executed for treason
For not agreeing to the split with Rome
The first English language Bible printed
Tyndale and Coverdale - hey boys, well done
Meanwhile, in Germany, they defeated
The Munster Anabaptists, kept the lid
On that rebellious brew. Peru was live
Over in South America, as one
Francisco Pizarro that year founded
Lima, which of course subsequently thrived
Unlike the Inca, who faced perdition
Wed 17 Oct
Tuesday 16 November 2010
1534 - William thrills 'em
A happy news story - Prince William
Has announced his engagement to his Kate
Of the common family, Middleton
Don't they look good? This news story is great
Happiness on a specially-engraved plate
It brings back memories of Charles and Di
Though compared with his dad, it's an update
The royal family needs to qualify
For media and society scrutiny
Buckingham Palace was a worldwide scrum
Of interviews and interviewees late
Into the evening. Now we're getting the
Potted history of getting it on
The future king's girl was prepared to wait
Has announced his engagement to his Kate
Of the common family, Middleton
Don't they look good? This news story is great
Happiness on a specially-engraved plate
It brings back memories of Charles and Di
Though compared with his dad, it's an update
The royal family needs to qualify
For media and society scrutiny
Buckingham Palace was a worldwide scrum
Of interviews and interviewees late
Into the evening. Now we're getting the
Potted history of getting it on
The future king's girl was prepared to wait
Monday 15 November 2010
1533 - Head over heels
Back in the year of 1533
Anne Boleyn didn't use her pretty head
For in that year she married King Henry
The Eighth, who was excommunicated
By Pope Clement the Seventh for the deed
Of divorcing Catherine of Aragon
Without papal consent; a move which led
Henry to break with Catholicism
A historic decision for England
And the USA and all colonies
Yet all these momentous events were sped
By Catherine's childlessness. Was she barren?
Meanwhile Anne was made pregnant so quickly
Perhaps before the two lovebirds wedded
Anne Boleyn didn't use her pretty head
For in that year she married King Henry
The Eighth, who was excommunicated
By Pope Clement the Seventh for the deed
Of divorcing Catherine of Aragon
Without papal consent; a move which led
Henry to break with Catholicism
A historic decision for England
And the USA and all colonies
Yet all these momentous events were sped
By Catherine's childlessness. Was she barren?
Meanwhile Anne was made pregnant so quickly
Perhaps before the two lovebirds wedded
Sunday 14 November 2010
1532 - Miracle at Abu Dhabi
Maybe there is a God. If so, then he
Must have been up above or in the crowd
At the motor racing, Abu Dhabi
Overseeing things as the cars roared loud
Around and around, around and around
Sebastian Vettel in pole position
Remained first to the end, while losing ground
The bad-tempered Alonso's frustration
Poured out, berating the bemused Russian
Driver, Petrov, abusing him simply
Because he wouldn't let him pass. Well how
Darn cheeky can you be? So the champion
Driver this year is Vettel (Germany)
Oh Lord, reward the good and damn the proud
Must have been up above or in the crowd
At the motor racing, Abu Dhabi
Overseeing things as the cars roared loud
Around and around, around and around
Sebastian Vettel in pole position
Remained first to the end, while losing ground
The bad-tempered Alonso's frustration
Poured out, berating the bemused Russian
Driver, Petrov, abusing him simply
Because he wouldn't let him pass. Well how
Darn cheeky can you be? So the champion
Driver this year is Vettel (Germany)
Oh Lord, reward the good and damn the proud
Saturday 13 November 2010
1531 - On thin ice
Ice skating is such fun even when you
Fall over, but if you do, watch fingers
Or they might have to be sewn on anew
My daughter, regular roller-blader
Was really good at it today. Last year
She clung to the wall. Now she's confident
She didn't fall over once, unlike pa
But I improved sufficiently and went
Quite fast after a while. The hour spent,
We went for a second meal, as you do
When you are a bit greedy. Tonight, the
Film I'm going to watch is 'Atonement'
Although McEwan is my cup of poo
It's probably his best book, I would guess
Fall over, but if you do, watch fingers
Or they might have to be sewn on anew
My daughter, regular roller-blader
Was really good at it today. Last year
She clung to the wall. Now she's confident
She didn't fall over once, unlike pa
But I improved sufficiently and went
Quite fast after a while. The hour spent,
We went for a second meal, as you do
When you are a bit greedy. Tonight, the
Film I'm going to watch is 'Atonement'
Although McEwan is my cup of poo
It's probably his best book, I would guess
Friday 12 November 2010
1530 - Crash bang wallop
Last night I watched 'Crash' - not the Cronenberg
Film adaptation of J.G. Ballard
No, the Oscar-winner that by and large
Shows racism is wrong; lessons are poured
From camera into eye. Characters are hard-
Pressed to love thy neighbour down in LA
And yet, by the end, most do, though they're scarred
By events in that multi-ethnic fray
But tonight, folks, yes, Borat's on his way
From Kazakhstan he cometh, like iceberg
To Titanic USA; having sparred
With its good people, leading them astray
With subterfuge, he leaves them much perturbed
'Borat' did not win an Oscar award
Film adaptation of J.G. Ballard
No, the Oscar-winner that by and large
Shows racism is wrong; lessons are poured
From camera into eye. Characters are hard-
Pressed to love thy neighbour down in LA
And yet, by the end, most do, though they're scarred
By events in that multi-ethnic fray
But tonight, folks, yes, Borat's on his way
From Kazakhstan he cometh, like iceberg
To Titanic USA; having sparred
With its good people, leading them astray
With subterfuge, he leaves them much perturbed
'Borat' did not win an Oscar award
Thursday 11 November 2010
1529 - D.I.V.O.R.C.E.
In 1529 Henry VIII
Was after a divorce, which Cardinal
Wolsey could not get for him, so, irate,
Henry dismissed the Cardinal, in all
His fine red robes, no longer powerful
Rebuffed by the Pope, Henry huffed and puffed
The houses of the holy soon to fall
And all English Catholics would be stuffed
But of course that did not happen, though tough
Times lay ahead for both sides. In France, hate
Would lead to massacre. Here, proud old walls
Would be defaced, shorn of image, and roofs
Smashed in, monks thrown out, carrying their weight
Down the open road, sacks heavy and full
Was after a divorce, which Cardinal
Wolsey could not get for him, so, irate,
Henry dismissed the Cardinal, in all
His fine red robes, no longer powerful
Rebuffed by the Pope, Henry huffed and puffed
The houses of the holy soon to fall
And all English Catholics would be stuffed
But of course that did not happen, though tough
Times lay ahead for both sides. In France, hate
Would lead to massacre. Here, proud old walls
Would be defaced, shorn of image, and roofs
Smashed in, monks thrown out, carrying their weight
Down the open road, sacks heavy and full
Wednesday 10 November 2010
1528 - Mister cold wind
Mister cold wind you can blow all you like
I don't care, north west east or south, you're from
Just carry on, just blow and take a hike
You certainly don't cause me no alarm
Cos look at me - I've got my warm coat on
So I don't give a stuff - in fact it's great
I'm enjoying this time of the season
Where have you been, anyway - were you late?
At last now, at the weekends, we can skate
So come on, cold wind, you get on your bike
And pedal hard til your frozen bones hum
I now confidently anticipate
Snowfall from a big cold temperature spike
Don't let me down, cold wind - blow, and then some
I don't care, north west east or south, you're from
Just carry on, just blow and take a hike
You certainly don't cause me no alarm
Cos look at me - I've got my warm coat on
So I don't give a stuff - in fact it's great
I'm enjoying this time of the season
Where have you been, anyway - were you late?
At last now, at the weekends, we can skate
So come on, cold wind, you get on your bike
And pedal hard til your frozen bones hum
I now confidently anticipate
Snowfall from a big cold temperature spike
Don't let me down, cold wind - blow, and then some
Tuesday 9 November 2010
1527 - Come and see
Since I got home I've felt quite lethargic
So next I think I'll watch a film I got
Through the post recently. What is this flick?
It's set in Russia, World War Two, a lot
Of those atrocities are shown. It's not
For the faint-hearted. I remember where
I first watched it, twenty years ago, sat
In the Cornerhouse Cinema. I swear
A film sticks in your mind more when it's there
On the big screen. It is realistic
The steppes more deeply reddened with each shot
A subtitled lament, mother's despair
A Russian 'Schindler's List' - just as tragic
So 'Come and See'... My popcorn's almost hot
So next I think I'll watch a film I got
Through the post recently. What is this flick?
It's set in Russia, World War Two, a lot
Of those atrocities are shown. It's not
For the faint-hearted. I remember where
I first watched it, twenty years ago, sat
In the Cornerhouse Cinema. I swear
A film sticks in your mind more when it's there
On the big screen. It is realistic
The steppes more deeply reddened with each shot
A subtitled lament, mother's despair
A Russian 'Schindler's List' - just as tragic
So 'Come and See'... My popcorn's almost hot
Monday 8 November 2010
1526 - We're all in the shit together - apart from some
It's not much fun when your computer's fucked
Now Spotify won't play properly no more
I can't send emails half the time; no luck
With anything. I seem to be a poor
Worker in the maligned public sector
No bin for my rubbish; taken away
By edicts intended to save. The law
Is being mobilised, so some might say
Against the vast majority who pay
The tax they should, or wish they could, but sucked
Into the vortex of cuts is the claw
Of taxation itself. Some say hooray,
Henry. The Treasury will remain crocked
While business dodges tax and stays offshore
Now Spotify won't play properly no more
I can't send emails half the time; no luck
With anything. I seem to be a poor
Worker in the maligned public sector
No bin for my rubbish; taken away
By edicts intended to save. The law
Is being mobilised, so some might say
Against the vast majority who pay
The tax they should, or wish they could, but sucked
Into the vortex of cuts is the claw
Of taxation itself. Some say hooray,
Henry. The Treasury will remain crocked
While business dodges tax and stays offshore
Sunday 7 November 2010
1525 - Rip it up
This morning the bathroom carpet came up
That dirty old blue thing that I hated
Carpets are stupid, collecting such muck
I thought it was stuck down, but I lifted
The whole thing up in less than a minute
Carrying it onto the balcony
I'd like to say that from there I chucked it
But do you really think I'm that messy?
I won't move it for months, though, probably
And after that bombshell, took hours to put
My holiday snaps on Facebook. That said,
It's a relief they're there at last, safely
And then posted these sonnets. I've caught up
To date with this blog. Now it's time to eat!
That dirty old blue thing that I hated
Carpets are stupid, collecting such muck
I thought it was stuck down, but I lifted
The whole thing up in less than a minute
Carrying it onto the balcony
I'd like to say that from there I chucked it
But do you really think I'm that messy?
I won't move it for months, though, probably
And after that bombshell, took hours to put
My holiday snaps on Facebook. That said,
It's a relief they're there at last, safely
And then posted these sonnets. I've caught up
To date with this blog. Now it's time to eat!
1524 - After the fire
Last night was Bonfire Night, strictly speaking
But tonight was the local fireworks show
Not here in Salford where I'm now living
But in the town I once lived in, Wilmslow
I took Josie and bought her ears that glow
So funny afterwards driving with her
Wearing those flashing lights in her hand, though
It was hard concentrating upon where
I was going. Some shopping earlier
I succeeded in buying and fitting
A new bulb in my bedside lamp, and so
I can turn off the light while lying there
A luxury that I have been missing
And so to bed; well, quite soon I shall go
Sat 6 Nov
But tonight was the local fireworks show
Not here in Salford where I'm now living
But in the town I once lived in, Wilmslow
I took Josie and bought her ears that glow
So funny afterwards driving with her
Wearing those flashing lights in her hand, though
It was hard concentrating upon where
I was going. Some shopping earlier
I succeeded in buying and fitting
A new bulb in my bedside lamp, and so
I can turn off the light while lying there
A luxury that I have been missing
And so to bed; well, quite soon I shall go
Sat 6 Nov
1523 - Bang bang
A long play of guitar inspired by
Last night in Bolton, realising I
Am nearly ready to play live. So high
Listening to and playing music. Why
Do anything else? That is the question
I have to minimise all distractions
Mind you, does that include any girlfriends?
Maybe... I had better pass on that one
It's Friday night, it's Bonfire Night, bang bang
They're letting fireworks off out there, bang bang
Tomorrow I'm taking Josie, bang bang
To a bonfire celebration, bang bang
But for now I'll sit here on the sofa
And watch some telly, knocking back some beer
Fri 5 Nov
Last night in Bolton, realising I
Am nearly ready to play live. So high
Listening to and playing music. Why
Do anything else? That is the question
I have to minimise all distractions
Mind you, does that include any girlfriends?
Maybe... I had better pass on that one
It's Friday night, it's Bonfire Night, bang bang
They're letting fireworks off out there, bang bang
Tomorrow I'm taking Josie, bang bang
To a bonfire celebration, bang bang
But for now I'll sit here on the sofa
And watch some telly, knocking back some beer
Fri 5 Nov
1522 - The butterfly of truth
A rainy night in Bolton - so what's new?
But still a good night at Butterflies Bar
I went the wrong way driving home - what's new?
There's something about me, Bolton and car
Yet more tales of woe with my computer
I may soon lose the fake Windows I bought
Unknowingly last month from a shyster
In Salford. Lately I keep getting caught
By dodgy people. Yet again I'm taught
...But who is there to trust? That's nothing new!
More expense buying XP or Vista
From a reputable dealer, or ought
I to risk eBay sellers? Wish I knew
A good night, though, filled with verse and guitar
Thur 4 Nov
But still a good night at Butterflies Bar
I went the wrong way driving home - what's new?
There's something about me, Bolton and car
Yet more tales of woe with my computer
I may soon lose the fake Windows I bought
Unknowingly last month from a shyster
In Salford. Lately I keep getting caught
By dodgy people. Yet again I'm taught
...But who is there to trust? That's nothing new!
More expense buying XP or Vista
From a reputable dealer, or ought
I to risk eBay sellers? Wish I knew
A good night, though, filled with verse and guitar
Thur 4 Nov
1521 - Will Barack be back (baby)?
In the USA the Republicans
Took control of the Representatives
Barack Obama was the top guy once
But now, puzzled, he seems to ask, 'What gives?'
The next president won't be he who proves
He's better. It's just the economy,
Stupid. If the people see upward moves
In jobs and wealth, a second term may be
Possible for him; but for today he
Looks down. Meanwhile a medical advance
In the attempt to cure blindness it leaves
Room for hope that the blind may one day see
Yesterday there was a big explosion
Salford shook and ten homes fell - but mine lives!
Wed 3 Nov
Took control of the Representatives
Barack Obama was the top guy once
But now, puzzled, he seems to ask, 'What gives?'
The next president won't be he who proves
He's better. It's just the economy,
Stupid. If the people see upward moves
In jobs and wealth, a second term may be
Possible for him; but for today he
Looks down. Meanwhile a medical advance
In the attempt to cure blindness it leaves
Room for hope that the blind may one day see
Yesterday there was a big explosion
Salford shook and ten homes fell - but mine lives!
Wed 3 Nov
1520 - The things we do for poetry
I'm sitting in the Crown pub, Liverpool
This rainy and dark November evening
I need to sit back , for the day was full
Of deliberation at the meeting
That has just finished and was quite taxing
As tax often is. Fish and chips all gone
Fingers crossed I don't get food poisoning
No reason why I should; it tasted fine
But the carpet in here looks very worn
And the tables are sticky, some with pools
Of beer. I'm here by way of time passing
There's three dark wet hours to pass til it's time
For 'Liver Bards' poetry group, where fools
And wise men stand and read out their scribblings
Tue 2 Nov
This rainy and dark November evening
I need to sit back , for the day was full
Of deliberation at the meeting
That has just finished and was quite taxing
As tax often is. Fish and chips all gone
Fingers crossed I don't get food poisoning
No reason why I should; it tasted fine
But the carpet in here looks very worn
And the tables are sticky, some with pools
Of beer. I'm here by way of time passing
There's three dark wet hours to pass til it's time
For 'Liver Bards' poetry group, where fools
And wise men stand and read out their scribblings
Tue 2 Nov
1519 - Bossy people from history
1519 was quite significant
Martin Luther was challenging the Pope
This German, so certain, so confident
Was pushing the reformist envelope
A view that would give northern princes hope
Of freedom from Rome, while Hernan Cortes
The Spanish conquistador, threw a rope
Around the neck of Mexico. Aztecs
In Tenochtitlan would soon have regrets
Moctezuma's court began its death pant
Aztecs, Incas strangled. Vainly they groped
But Europe had begun to throw its nets
On Africa; now this new continent
Of America was under its yoke
Mon 1 Nov
Martin Luther was challenging the Pope
This German, so certain, so confident
Was pushing the reformist envelope
A view that would give northern princes hope
Of freedom from Rome, while Hernan Cortes
The Spanish conquistador, threw a rope
Around the neck of Mexico. Aztecs
In Tenochtitlan would soon have regrets
Moctezuma's court began its death pant
Aztecs, Incas strangled. Vainly they groped
But Europe had begun to throw its nets
On Africa; now this new continent
Of America was under its yoke
Mon 1 Nov
1518 - Ghost in the machine
This Halloween's not been hellish for me
I drove to town and saw them all dressed up
In scary guises, but I had to be
Serious, buying my monitor - yep,
At last! I carried it and didn't trip
Back to the car, all in one piece, thank God
Back home, connected it to the laptop
And, thank the devil, it worked, but the odds
Were against me again for I had lost
My broadband connection; I couldn't see
How to restore it, so I rang them up
And O2 helped me. All evening, uploads
Of holiday pix at last I could see
Still got my mobile pix, though, to load up
Sun 31 Oct
I drove to town and saw them all dressed up
In scary guises, but I had to be
Serious, buying my monitor - yep,
At last! I carried it and didn't trip
Back to the car, all in one piece, thank God
Back home, connected it to the laptop
And, thank the devil, it worked, but the odds
Were against me again for I had lost
My broadband connection; I couldn't see
How to restore it, so I rang them up
And O2 helped me. All evening, uploads
Of holiday pix at last I could see
Still got my mobile pix, though, to load up
Sun 31 Oct
1517 - Cold, naked and alone
This last day of light, we went to Crosby
A huge beach near Liverpool, famous for
Lifesize statues of Antony Gormley
Stood on the beach or in the sea. There are
A hundred identical men. They stare
Westwards towards the ocean, all thinking
Of another place, like America
Perhaps they're meant to be remembering
Friends or family, all disappearing
By ship or aircraft far beyond the sea
Landing like Columbus on that far shore
And so these statues all stand there, longing
For lost relationships, no more to be
Seen, left naked and bereft, loved no more
Sat 30 Oct
A huge beach near Liverpool, famous for
Lifesize statues of Antony Gormley
Stood on the beach or in the sea. There are
A hundred identical men. They stare
Westwards towards the ocean, all thinking
Of another place, like America
Perhaps they're meant to be remembering
Friends or family, all disappearing
By ship or aircraft far beyond the sea
Landing like Columbus on that far shore
And so these statues all stand there, longing
For lost relationships, no more to be
Seen, left naked and bereft, loved no more
Sat 30 Oct
1516 - Back to the musical future
I wanna be in a seventies band
I wanna be in a seventies band
This is the future for me that I've planned
I wanna be in a seventies band
Before the rot of punk and dance set in
Before the rot of punk and dance set in
Because i like the music of a man
Before the rot of punk and dance set in
I don't mind funk or soul either, you know
I don't mind funk or soul either, you know
Provide the foundation on which it stands
I don't mind funk or soul either, you know
Mix it all together, water and sand
Mix it all together, water and sand
Fri 29 Oct
I wanna be in a seventies band
This is the future for me that I've planned
I wanna be in a seventies band
Before the rot of punk and dance set in
Before the rot of punk and dance set in
Because i like the music of a man
Before the rot of punk and dance set in
I don't mind funk or soul either, you know
I don't mind funk or soul either, you know
Provide the foundation on which it stands
I don't mind funk or soul either, you know
Mix it all together, water and sand
Mix it all together, water and sand
Fri 29 Oct
1515 - Salford - slightly better than the North Pole
My bones ache with the onset of the cold
Weather. Perhaps in California
I would be better, although I've been told
Warm places can sometimes be chillier
At night or in the depths of the winter
So maybe I'll just stay here in Salford
At least I'm not in Scotland, Canada
Or Norway in the mouth of some fjord
In some ways we are all under the sword
Of Damocles...I'm sorry for that old
Cliche. I have to try to do better
But not now. It's too late to think in broad
Terms or be 'cutting edge'... Comedy gold -
Sword. Cutting edge. Geddit? Quite witty, yeah?
Thur 28 Oct
Weather. Perhaps in California
I would be better, although I've been told
Warm places can sometimes be chillier
At night or in the depths of the winter
So maybe I'll just stay here in Salford
At least I'm not in Scotland, Canada
Or Norway in the mouth of some fjord
In some ways we are all under the sword
Of Damocles...I'm sorry for that old
Cliche. I have to try to do better
But not now. It's too late to think in broad
Terms or be 'cutting edge'... Comedy gold -
Sword. Cutting edge. Geddit? Quite witty, yeah?
Thur 28 Oct
1514 - Drink tank
Alcohol has passed my lips tonight, first
Time since Turkey, and I am pissed, and it's
Not good... So many legs and so much thirst
So many faces and so many tits
It is ridiculous walking the streets
Seeing so many women, but they're not
Available, or are they? All these Brits
Eye contact suggests that they are quite hot
But what do you do about it? Yes, what?
Your mental balloon is about to burst
But thankfully the drink has left you fit
For not a lot, yes, fit for not a lot
Self-medication, it leaves you the worst
For wear, it leaves you feeling like the pits
Wed 27 Oct
Time since Turkey, and I am pissed, and it's
Not good... So many legs and so much thirst
So many faces and so many tits
It is ridiculous walking the streets
Seeing so many women, but they're not
Available, or are they? All these Brits
Eye contact suggests that they are quite hot
But what do you do about it? Yes, what?
Your mental balloon is about to burst
But thankfully the drink has left you fit
For not a lot, yes, fit for not a lot
Self-medication, it leaves you the worst
For wear, it leaves you feeling like the pits
Wed 27 Oct
1513 - Cold bed
My feet are cold; should I put the heat on?
Too late now; bedtime's near; I'll warm up there
Under the covers; maybe keep socks on
Tonight I could do with a hot water
Bottle, like days of old. Snowy winter
In a seventies Midland town. Torchlight
Allowing me to read. A transistor
Radio playing John Peel til midnight
Sham 69, Pere Ubu, Banshees might
Be playing. Voices beneath the nylon
Echo even today as I lie here
A lifetime away, preparing for night
Once more, having drifted, often alone...
Warm socks... Tomorrow I might buy a pair
Tue 26 Oct
Too late now; bedtime's near; I'll warm up there
Under the covers; maybe keep socks on
Tonight I could do with a hot water
Bottle, like days of old. Snowy winter
In a seventies Midland town. Torchlight
Allowing me to read. A transistor
Radio playing John Peel til midnight
Sham 69, Pere Ubu, Banshees might
Be playing. Voices beneath the nylon
Echo even today as I lie here
A lifetime away, preparing for night
Once more, having drifted, often alone...
Warm socks... Tomorrow I might buy a pair
Tue 26 Oct
1512 - I haven't lost interest
I should be better by now but I'm not
Although I'm better than I was for sure
I ache a bit, my nose is full of snot
My health isn't shit, but it's still quite poor
Never mind health though - some things are far more
Important to happiness, like money
I phoned my credit card company for
Another balance transfer, so that three
Thousand I shouldn't have spent in Turkey
Could have nought per cent interest, but I got
Told it was too late: now the interest's your
Standard high rate with them. Virgin Money,
Same as with the card it's on now. I've got
No interest in high interest rates no more
Mon 25 Oct
Although I'm better than I was for sure
I ache a bit, my nose is full of snot
My health isn't shit, but it's still quite poor
Never mind health though - some things are far more
Important to happiness, like money
I phoned my credit card company for
Another balance transfer, so that three
Thousand I shouldn't have spent in Turkey
Could have nought per cent interest, but I got
Told it was too late: now the interest's your
Standard high rate with them. Virgin Money,
Same as with the card it's on now. I've got
No interest in high interest rates no more
Mon 25 Oct
1511 - Another dance to the music of time
I've spent hours listening to old music
From the twenties to 2001
I started off with good old Bessie Smith
And then I span a disc of Sarah Vaughan
My ears were still hungry for new old songs
So straightaway I played a '95
(Greatest Hits Of) and straight after moved on
To 'Best of '99'... It's nice to dive
Into the past like that, but never live
There full-time; come up for breath and drift with
The current tide. Watch X-Factor, and then
Back to a golden age that's still alive
In my head or on rotating plastic -
Tunes make more sense to me than anyone
Sun 24 Oct
From the twenties to 2001
I started off with good old Bessie Smith
And then I span a disc of Sarah Vaughan
My ears were still hungry for new old songs
So straightaway I played a '95
(Greatest Hits Of) and straight after moved on
To 'Best of '99'... It's nice to dive
Into the past like that, but never live
There full-time; come up for breath and drift with
The current tide. Watch X-Factor, and then
Back to a golden age that's still alive
In my head or on rotating plastic -
Tunes make more sense to me than anyone
Sun 24 Oct
1510 - Cheshire cats
I wondered where to take Pearl and Josie
The weather was too bad to go too far
Looking in shops a possibility
Decided upon the Trafford Centre
But Josie's mum had heard about terror
Threats, and such places can be where they hit
We almost went to Liverpool by car
But Knutsford was far nearer; besides, it
Was already 2:15. Much too wet
To visit the park, we just wandered, three
Of us, to Ye Olde Sweet Shoppe, where we scored
Some tooth-decaying treats. Later we sat
In a great penny-farthing-themed cafe
Tea, lemonade and laughter - ha ha HA!
Sat 23 Oct
The weather was too bad to go too far
Looking in shops a possibility
Decided upon the Trafford Centre
But Josie's mum had heard about terror
Threats, and such places can be where they hit
We almost went to Liverpool by car
But Knutsford was far nearer; besides, it
Was already 2:15. Much too wet
To visit the park, we just wandered, three
Of us, to Ye Olde Sweet Shoppe, where we scored
Some tooth-decaying treats. Later we sat
In a great penny-farthing-themed cafe
Tea, lemonade and laughter - ha ha HA!
Sat 23 Oct
1509 - Staying in the frying pan
I'd make you an omelette but there's no you
So I'll eat it instead - how about that?
I'll make it with cheese and mushrooms, imbue
It with some flavour, stop it going flat
By shaking the pan, cover it in fat
No, vegetable oil, I mean. Hunger
Is growing as I write this on my pad
It's a hunger that will soon be over
Well, maybe for an hour or two, till the
Daylight returns, when it all starts anew
I could do with somebody in this flat
Sometimes, but most of the time I don't care
It's me time until 2022
Who cares if that makes me a selfish tw*t!
Fri 22 Oct
So I'll eat it instead - how about that?
I'll make it with cheese and mushrooms, imbue
It with some flavour, stop it going flat
By shaking the pan, cover it in fat
No, vegetable oil, I mean. Hunger
Is growing as I write this on my pad
It's a hunger that will soon be over
Well, maybe for an hour or two, till the
Daylight returns, when it all starts anew
I could do with somebody in this flat
Sometimes, but most of the time I don't care
It's me time until 2022
Who cares if that makes me a selfish tw*t!
Fri 22 Oct
1508 - High street butcher
George Osborne sounds like a family butcher
On a good old-fashioned English high street
And indeed he has employed his cleaver
Cutting through flesh and bone; but human meat
Is what he's chopping up - the hands and feet
Of conscious but helpless British livestock
It is once more acceptable to eat
The choicest cuts, wiping lips with a cloth
Clinking champagne glasses. Life on the rocks
Is what you swallow. Keep warm this winter
On the high-protein diet that can't be beat
Eat poor people. We're winding back the clock
To the morals of Queen Victoria
Mass misery, but for some, life is sweet
Thur 21 Oct
On a good old-fashioned English high street
And indeed he has employed his cleaver
Cutting through flesh and bone; but human meat
Is what he's chopping up - the hands and feet
Of conscious but helpless British livestock
It is once more acceptable to eat
The choicest cuts, wiping lips with a cloth
Clinking champagne glasses. Life on the rocks
Is what you swallow. Keep warm this winter
On the high-protein diet that can't be beat
Eat poor people. We're winding back the clock
To the morals of Queen Victoria
Mass misery, but for some, life is sweet
Thur 21 Oct
1507 - Roo-mours
So will Wayne Rooney turn from red to blue?
Will he move from United to City?
Is this talk mere rumour, or is it true?
Not since those great days of the late sixties
Not since the days of Bell, Book, Marsh and Lee
Not since the late great Malcolm Allison
Was coach; ever since Tommy Docherty
Became coach of the Reds, have City come
This close to claiming the top position
In the league table, or rising from two
To number one in Manchester. If he
Does swap Manchester football clubs, there's some
United fans who could well rue that Roo
Has left them to stagnate, quite possibly
Wed 20 Oct
Will he move from United to City?
Is this talk mere rumour, or is it true?
Not since those great days of the late sixties
Not since the days of Bell, Book, Marsh and Lee
Not since the late great Malcolm Allison
Was coach; ever since Tommy Docherty
Became coach of the Reds, have City come
This close to claiming the top position
In the league table, or rising from two
To number one in Manchester. If he
Does swap Manchester football clubs, there's some
United fans who could well rue that Roo
Has left them to stagnate, quite possibly
Wed 20 Oct
Thursday 28 October 2010
1506 - Heaven nose I'm miserable now
The year '10's heading for its end, and I'm
Still struggling with my cold and too much debt
Too much snot, too much debt. It's not so fine
To find myself like this at my age; yet
I'm not so unhappy, not much regret
I wouldn't say I've none - that's a cliche
And a lie in most cases. We forget
A lot of shit decisions if we say
That. Happiness is ours, if we don't weigh
Others' opinions more than our own mind
I enjoy playing on my strings and frets
It costs nothing, it keeps boredom at bay
It's physical and mental fitness time
Playing guitar or any instrument
Tue 19 Oct
Still struggling with my cold and too much debt
Too much snot, too much debt. It's not so fine
To find myself like this at my age; yet
I'm not so unhappy, not much regret
I wouldn't say I've none - that's a cliche
And a lie in most cases. We forget
A lot of shit decisions if we say
That. Happiness is ours, if we don't weigh
Others' opinions more than our own mind
I enjoy playing on my strings and frets
It costs nothing, it keeps boredom at bay
It's physical and mental fitness time
Playing guitar or any instrument
Tue 19 Oct
1505 - Work doesn't have to be taxing
Too much chat at work and not enough done
Chats about economics, holidays
Chats about everything under the sun
So much chat I couldn't read my emails
One guy not seen for a while telling tales
Of a nasty skin disease that he caught
Meanwhile my divorce is back on the rails
As the afternoon sky darkened, I thought
I'd stay in this evening. I've still not bought
A new monitor. This didn't get done
Because of too much chat. Everyone says
Far too much at work. I'm one of that sort
Still, work is fairly stress-free, almost fun
But will the taxpayer soon refuse to pay?
Mon 18 Oct
Chats about economics, holidays
Chats about everything under the sun
So much chat I couldn't read my emails
One guy not seen for a while telling tales
Of a nasty skin disease that he caught
Meanwhile my divorce is back on the rails
As the afternoon sky darkened, I thought
I'd stay in this evening. I've still not bought
A new monitor. This didn't get done
Because of too much chat. Everyone says
Far too much at work. I'm one of that sort
Still, work is fairly stress-free, almost fun
But will the taxpayer soon refuse to pay?
Mon 18 Oct
1504 - No fly zone
A pleasant sunny day. Salford Market
Seemed worth a look. I'd hoped to buy a screen
For my laptop there, but didn't find it.
Too dodgy-looking. Who knows where it's been?
Off the back of a lorry stuff, could be
I'll look on eBay tomorrow at work
This afternoon, took Pearl to see Josie
Carvery at the Coach and Four, some pork
Turkey and beef. Pearl - vegetarian - looked
But the veg risotto was off limits
It had dairy products, and Pearl's not keen
On them; in fact, allergic. I have booked
Pearl and Josie for next Saturday. It's
Time to go flying! You'll see what I mean...
Sun 17 Oct
You won't see what I mean, because I didn't go flying the following week in the end. By flying, I mean simulated flying where you float in a wind tunnel, held up by air currents. £35 for two minutes of flying, it costs, although that includes some preparatory coaching. I had a voucher paid for my office pals as a birthday present last January. It turned out that the voucher expired on 10 October while I was away. I had thought it expired on 31 October. Wrong! Doh...
Seemed worth a look. I'd hoped to buy a screen
For my laptop there, but didn't find it.
Too dodgy-looking. Who knows where it's been?
Off the back of a lorry stuff, could be
I'll look on eBay tomorrow at work
This afternoon, took Pearl to see Josie
Carvery at the Coach and Four, some pork
Turkey and beef. Pearl - vegetarian - looked
But the veg risotto was off limits
It had dairy products, and Pearl's not keen
On them; in fact, allergic. I have booked
Pearl and Josie for next Saturday. It's
Time to go flying! You'll see what I mean...
Sun 17 Oct
You won't see what I mean, because I didn't go flying the following week in the end. By flying, I mean simulated flying where you float in a wind tunnel, held up by air currents. £35 for two minutes of flying, it costs, although that includes some preparatory coaching. I had a voucher paid for my office pals as a birthday present last January. It turned out that the voucher expired on 10 October while I was away. I had thought it expired on 31 October. Wrong! Doh...
1503 - Learning about my body
Better today; another good night's sleep
Has helped. I've rediscovered radio
Since my computer screen broke. We must keep
Up to date with new music, doncha know
Radio 1 Xtra was playing, though
I also read a book about gypsies
And then another book; one that is so
Well-illustrated, about our bodies
Each tiny cell with its complexities
And DNA. My learning curve is steep
Watched some old TV I taped years ago
On video, since transferred to DVDs
Tuned in to the football scores - those male sheep
The Derby Rams, beat Preston three-zero!
Sat 16 Oct
Has helped. I've rediscovered radio
Since my computer screen broke. We must keep
Up to date with new music, doncha know
Radio 1 Xtra was playing, though
I also read a book about gypsies
And then another book; one that is so
Well-illustrated, about our bodies
Each tiny cell with its complexities
And DNA. My learning curve is steep
Watched some old TV I taped years ago
On video, since transferred to DVDs
Tuned in to the football scores - those male sheep
The Derby Rams, beat Preston three-zero!
Sat 16 Oct
1502 - The book of the Irish
I took the day off sick with my bad cold
Only went out to shop at Sainsburys
And though my laptop screen's dead and I could
Have accessed the 'net in the library
I didn't feel well enough. Watched TV
For a while, eating every so often
Regular intake of coffee and tea
Almost 200 pages of reading
'Great Irish Speeches,' if you're wondering
Read as the washing machine rocked and rolled
A reminder of Irish history
While rehydrating and recovering
I'll stay home Saturday, sheep in its fold
And maybe I'll be better by Sunday
Fri 15 Oct
Only went out to shop at Sainsburys
And though my laptop screen's dead and I could
Have accessed the 'net in the library
I didn't feel well enough. Watched TV
For a while, eating every so often
Regular intake of coffee and tea
Almost 200 pages of reading
'Great Irish Speeches,' if you're wondering
Read as the washing machine rocked and rolled
A reminder of Irish history
While rehydrating and recovering
I'll stay home Saturday, sheep in its fold
And maybe I'll be better by Sunday
Fri 15 Oct
Saturday 23 October 2010
1501 - Bogey man
Train trip to Nottingham for a meeting
I walked by the canal to the office
Close to the castle where, maybe, fighting
Back in medieval times had taken place
But all day long I've had to wipe my face
With just about anything I could find
These germs I must have picked up on the bus
Or plane, or foreign bed; my nose is kind
Of sore, kind of red raw. As the train wound
Its way along the track, I kept popping
Into the small toilet to blow my nose
And take out piles of tissue by the pound
Throughout the meeting, too, I was wiping
My nose. Who knows? Friday, I might feel worse
Thur 14 Oct
I walked by the canal to the office
Close to the castle where, maybe, fighting
Back in medieval times had taken place
But all day long I've had to wipe my face
With just about anything I could find
These germs I must have picked up on the bus
Or plane, or foreign bed; my nose is kind
Of sore, kind of red raw. As the train wound
Its way along the track, I kept popping
Into the small toilet to blow my nose
And take out piles of tissue by the pound
Throughout the meeting, too, I was wiping
My nose. Who knows? Friday, I might feel worse
Thur 14 Oct
1500 - Does not compute
My Dell laptop is now on life support
I took it to be repaired in Salford
This evening. Later, he rang back, and talked
About my infected hard drive. I thought
It was protected, but I should've bought
Good quality software; rely on free
Stuff and you could regret it. He'll report
Back tomorrow. So will my laptop be
Resuscitated, working completely
Or will I be on eBay? Can't afford
Any more expense this month. Checked the card
I used so heavily back in Turkey
Was blocked from further use, else the Turks could
Extract yet more funds. They can't, and that's good
Wed 13 Oct
I took it to be repaired in Salford
This evening. Later, he rang back, and talked
About my infected hard drive. I thought
It was protected, but I should've bought
Good quality software; rely on free
Stuff and you could regret it. He'll report
Back tomorrow. So will my laptop be
Resuscitated, working completely
Or will I be on eBay? Can't afford
Any more expense this month. Checked the card
I used so heavily back in Turkey
Was blocked from further use, else the Turks could
Extract yet more funds. They can't, and that's good
Wed 13 Oct
1499 - Arrivederci Athens
Decent sleep on the top bunk in Athens
The Easy Access Hotel, once again
On Satovriandou Street, whores and their friends
Sit at tables. Nearby, into a vein
A woman shoots up in a doorway. Rain
Last night, but was it enough to wash all
That should be washed quite safely down the drain?
Train to the airport, suitcase really full
Heavy with dodgy carpet, hard to haul
Up kerbs and up steps from railway platforms
I got home to find my computer's gone
Not stolen - just no longer usable
Before the holiday there had been signs
It was about to go. More expense, then
Tue 12 Oct
The Easy Access Hotel, once again
On Satovriandou Street, whores and their friends
Sit at tables. Nearby, into a vein
A woman shoots up in a doorway. Rain
Last night, but was it enough to wash all
That should be washed quite safely down the drain?
Train to the airport, suitcase really full
Heavy with dodgy carpet, hard to haul
Up kerbs and up steps from railway platforms
I got home to find my computer's gone
Not stolen - just no longer usable
Before the holiday there had been signs
It was about to go. More expense, then
Tue 12 Oct
Monday 11 October 2010
1498 - Athena again
On the night bus from Turkey, was pissed off
By some loud-mouthed Turk blokes. I know the type
My Turkish ex-neighbour had the same laugh
And inconsiderate nature. Frequent stops
For cigarettes and maybe an ass-wipe
Athens was traffic-choked - no surprise there
Chaos on Ermou - taxi, motorbike
Bus and death wish pedestrians appear
And vanish in smoke, gone to who knows where
This last proper day not quite long enough
To see it all. Keramikos, then hyped
Acropolis, and Ancient Agora
My feet are aching now, but mustn't gripe!
By some loud-mouthed Turk blokes. I know the type
My Turkish ex-neighbour had the same laugh
And inconsiderate nature. Frequent stops
For cigarettes and maybe an ass-wipe
Athens was traffic-choked - no surprise there
Chaos on Ermou - taxi, motorbike
Bus and death wish pedestrians appear
And vanish in smoke, gone to who knows where
This last proper day not quite long enough
To see it all. Keramikos, then hyped
Acropolis, and Ancient Agora
The Parthenon was looking rather rough
My feet are aching now, but mustn't gripe!
1497 - Ten Ten Ten
Today is Ten Ten Ten: 10th October
And it deserves a ten for excitement
And even danger. Stranger days never -
Well, hardly ever - no, never happened
After posting last night's sonnet, I went
Out just for a five minute walk to draw
Out a little cash for the restaurant
In the hostel in Istanbul. My law
- Having bought carpets - was to spend no more
But on my short walk I met ("from Ankara")
Two guys who said, "Let's have a drink..." I went.
To cut a long story short, met a whore
In an expensive club; danced, drank with her.
Then, a hotel. By this is madness meant!
And it deserves a ten for excitement
And even danger. Stranger days never -
Well, hardly ever - no, never happened
After posting last night's sonnet, I went
Out just for a five minute walk to draw
Out a little cash for the restaurant
In the hostel in Istanbul. My law
- Having bought carpets - was to spend no more
But on my short walk I met ("from Ankara")
Two guys who said, "Let's have a drink..." I went.
To cut a long story short, met a whore
In an expensive club; danced, drank with her.
Then, a hotel. By this is madness meant!
Saturday 9 October 2010
1496 - Taken for a carpet ride
Crossed into Turkey 3.30 am
Got off the bus and queued for passport checks
A visa 15 euros please sir. When
Will they stop fleecing me... OK - now let's
Go from Greece like lightning. Istanbul - it's
Cold and damp. Dragged my suitcase all the way
To Topkapi but it's Sultanahmet
I wanted. Got the tram the other way
Nine stops in no time standing all the way
Checked in - saw the Blue Mosque. Loudly heard them
Calling the faithful through loudspeakers. Text
Of Islamic prayers wailed beautifully
Ayia Sofia twenty lira! Then
Was sold some extremely costly carpets
Got off the bus and queued for passport checks
A visa 15 euros please sir. When
Will they stop fleecing me... OK - now let's
Go from Greece like lightning. Istanbul - it's
Cold and damp. Dragged my suitcase all the way
To Topkapi but it's Sultanahmet
I wanted. Got the tram the other way
Nine stops in no time standing all the way
Checked in - saw the Blue Mosque. Loudly heard them
Calling the faithful through loudspeakers. Text
Of Islamic prayers wailed beautifully
Ayia Sofia twenty lira! Then
Was sold some extremely costly carpets
1495 - It's a long way, to Thessaloniki
A good day spent in Thessaloniki
Capital of Greek Macedonia
Its name translates 'Thessaly victory'
She was also a queen and after her
The new town was named - and nearby Pella
Was Alexander's birthplace; he conquered
As far east as the Indus. Even there
He wanted more but it was not granted.
The whole day with Dan and Fle - German friends -
Fle is short for Fleming. Sat by the sea -
Pavement cafe tables. Also where
Girls go by - Navarinou Street. Flocks. Herds
Of them. Went round the Archaeology
Museum. Now - night bus to Turkey - yeah!
Capital of Greek Macedonia
Its name translates 'Thessaly victory'
She was also a queen and after her
The new town was named - and nearby Pella
Was Alexander's birthplace; he conquered
As far east as the Indus. Even there
He wanted more but it was not granted.
The whole day with Dan and Fle - German friends -
Fle is short for Fleming. Sat by the sea -
Pavement cafe tables. Also where
Girls go by - Navarinou Street. Flocks. Herds
Of them. Went round the Archaeology
Museum. Now - night bus to Turkey - yeah!
1494 - Long day's journey into Greek night
Thessaloniki - six hours from Athens
By bus. The weather has turned wet and grey
Nevertheless the day's turned out quite fun
I walked along the sea front and saw a
Statue of Alex the Great sat on a
Stone horse - of course. The rain was relentless
Umbrellas were de rigueur; I saw they
Had them but didn't care - couldn't care less
I walked the shoreline. Aristotelous
Square commercialised but Greek girls were some
Sight for sore eyes. Me and two Germans - hey
Let's get pissed - and we did. Discussed the best
Things possible. Economics. Women.
Tomorrow - well that's just another day
By bus. The weather has turned wet and grey
Nevertheless the day's turned out quite fun
I walked along the sea front and saw a
Statue of Alex the Great sat on a
Stone horse - of course. The rain was relentless
Umbrellas were de rigueur; I saw they
Had them but didn't care - couldn't care less
I walked the shoreline. Aristotelous
Square commercialised but Greek girls were some
Sight for sore eyes. Me and two Germans - hey
Let's get pissed - and we did. Discussed the best
Things possible. Economics. Women.
Tomorrow - well that's just another day
Wednesday 6 October 2010
1493 - Zeus launches lightning strike on Apollo's shrine
I went with my room-mate to old Delphi
It's on the slopes of famed Mount Parnassos
First, though, we had to find Terminal B
Bus station in north Athens. Getting lost
Is easy in this town. Delphi's the most
Amazing set of ruins. Sybil's Rock
Would be enough for me, but there's a host
Of sacred stones, temples... A theatre, look!
I was all the way up when thunder struck -
Zeus missed me, but the downpour, that drenched me!
The pines offered no shelter; dangerous
Conditions forced a quick descent down rock-
Strewn paths streaming with mud. Throughout the three
Hour bus ride back I shivered in wet clothes
It's on the slopes of famed Mount Parnassos
First, though, we had to find Terminal B
Bus station in north Athens. Getting lost
Is easy in this town. Delphi's the most
Amazing set of ruins. Sybil's Rock
Would be enough for me, but there's a host
Of sacred stones, temples... A theatre, look!
I was all the way up when thunder struck -
Zeus missed me, but the downpour, that drenched me!
The pines offered no shelter; dangerous
Conditions forced a quick descent down rock-
Strewn paths streaming with mud. Throughout the three
Hour bus ride back I shivered in wet clothes
Tuesday 5 October 2010
1492 - Greeced lightning
Despite 1492 being big
As years go, specially Spain's 'Reconquista'
And Chris Columbus successfully rigged
Up for his crossing to America
Despite this, and that, Greece now looms larger
Extremely large, cos I'm there, physically
In Athens tonight, off Omonia
Square - the red light district, predictably
Well cheap hostels, they often tend to be
Like the one in Madrid last year - am frig-
In knackered; rose at 4 a.m. The air-
Plane flew at 7. Monasteriki,
Syntagma, Parthenon all seen. A prick
At the tattoo shop, too. Great, to be fair
As years go, specially Spain's 'Reconquista'
And Chris Columbus successfully rigged
Up for his crossing to America
Despite this, and that, Greece now looms larger
Extremely large, cos I'm there, physically
In Athens tonight, off Omonia
Square - the red light district, predictably
Well cheap hostels, they often tend to be
Like the one in Madrid last year - am frig-
In knackered; rose at 4 a.m. The air-
Plane flew at 7. Monasteriki,
Syntagma, Parthenon all seen. A prick
At the tattoo shop, too. Great, to be fair
Monday 4 October 2010
My next post (or seven) - the odyssey
Just to let y'all know I'm off to Athens and Thessaloniki, Greece, and have tentative plans to pop into Sofia, Bulgaria, en route to Istanbul, Turkey.
If I see an internet cafe I'll try to post stuff.
The photots should be viewable from around 13 October on Facebook / Tony Baxter (Manchester) - the one with the close-up face as his main picture!
I shall return!
Hasta la vista, baby!
Au revoir, mes amis!
(I don't know any Greek, sorry.....)
If I see an internet cafe I'll try to post stuff.
The photots should be viewable from around 13 October on Facebook / Tony Baxter (Manchester) - the one with the close-up face as his main picture!
I shall return!
Hasta la vista, baby!
Au revoir, mes amis!
(I don't know any Greek, sorry.....)
1491 - Greece my palm
My thoughts are turning more and more to Greece
Though as I write this, I'm still here working
This unloved, disrespected tax office
And others like it had a battering
In the media this last month, the fault being
Some people had been paid too much credit
And we asked for it back. I'm not working
In that part of the department; I sit
In the oils excise duty team, that's split
Between here and London. Today I greased
My palm with euros, which I'll be spending
As I travel by train and bus, and eat
Thriftily, I hope. I mustn't get fleeced
My growing debt will soon need repaying
Though as I write this, I'm still here working
This unloved, disrespected tax office
And others like it had a battering
In the media this last month, the fault being
Some people had been paid too much credit
And we asked for it back. I'm not working
In that part of the department; I sit
In the oils excise duty team, that's split
Between here and London. Today I greased
My palm with euros, which I'll be spending
As I travel by train and bus, and eat
Thriftily, I hope. I mustn't get fleeced
My growing debt will soon need repaying
Sunday 3 October 2010
1490 - Not so sunny Sunday
I’m writing this in total peace and quiet
Well, it’s quite quiet, apart from a noisy
Dog outside. Got a new Wilson Pickett
CD to play, and then I think I’ll see
‘Control’ with the director’s commentary
On DVD. Then, Match of the Day 2
Liverpool lost at home to Blackpool! The
Ryder Cup golf has mainly made the news
Because of heavy rainfall. Play lasts through
Monday, having to finish a day late
The Commonwealth Games began in Delhi
It’s dark by seven now, and that tells you
To close curtains, turn heat on for comfort
But I’ll hope for some Greek sun from Tuesday
Well, it’s quite quiet, apart from a noisy
Dog outside. Got a new Wilson Pickett
CD to play, and then I think I’ll see
‘Control’ with the director’s commentary
On DVD. Then, Match of the Day 2
Liverpool lost at home to Blackpool! The
Ryder Cup golf has mainly made the news
Because of heavy rainfall. Play lasts through
Monday, having to finish a day late
The Commonwealth Games began in Delhi
It’s dark by seven now, and that tells you
To close curtains, turn heat on for comfort
But I’ll hope for some Greek sun from Tuesday
Saturday 2 October 2010
1489 - All over the place
Three weeks to read three books is not enough
Time; I’m still reading Carol Ann Duffy
So I renewed them all, because I’m off
To Greece in three days’ time. Should be lovely!
I hope the train to Thessaloniki
Is running, and from there to Bulgaria
And from there to Istanbul in Turkey
(News of transport workers’ strikes, it scares ya…)
Meanwhile, today, took the train to Cheshire
To see my Josie; bike rides, food and stuff
There’s a waitress at Ned Yates who likes me
And, as is the way, well, I quite like her
But she’s too young, like Hannah. Must be tough
And find someone who’s really right for me
Time; I’m still reading Carol Ann Duffy
So I renewed them all, because I’m off
To Greece in three days’ time. Should be lovely!
I hope the train to Thessaloniki
Is running, and from there to Bulgaria
And from there to Istanbul in Turkey
(News of transport workers’ strikes, it scares ya…)
Meanwhile, today, took the train to Cheshire
To see my Josie; bike rides, food and stuff
There’s a waitress at Ned Yates who likes me
And, as is the way, well, I quite like her
But she’s too young, like Hannah. Must be tough
And find someone who’s really right for me
Friday 1 October 2010
1488 - New dawn of hope and slavery
This is about the great navigators
From Portugal, newly independent
Henry, the third son of King John the First
Known as ‘The Navigator,’ well he meant
To bypass North Africa, and prevent
Those dangerous Moors from robbing, kidnapping
And stopping trade with India, the land
Of spices. Venice, monopolising
The land route, also deterred such trading
So mainly from economic factors
Light caravels were built, and many sent
To gold and slave-rich shores, Henry storing
Wealth up in Lagos, enabling Dias
And Da Gama to sail the Cape’s current
From Portugal, newly independent
Henry, the third son of King John the First
Known as ‘The Navigator,’ well he meant
To bypass North Africa, and prevent
Those dangerous Moors from robbing, kidnapping
And stopping trade with India, the land
Of spices. Venice, monopolising
The land route, also deterred such trading
So mainly from economic factors
Light caravels were built, and many sent
To gold and slave-rich shores, Henry storing
Wealth up in Lagos, enabling Dias
And Da Gama to sail the Cape’s current
Thursday 30 September 2010
1487 - Eve of the dead
Off out tonight to the Bridgewater Hall
Classical concerts there are scary nights
You're surrounded by zombies, and they're all
Over seventy-five, and should by rights
Not have been let out of the home. Such sights
Aren't pleasant when you've paid, and dressed quite smart
Eccentric oldies, alone, with some light
Shopping in a plastic bag, dickie heart
And worst, a persistent cough. They ALL start
To clear their rheumy lungs when silence falls
Between symphonic movements. The slow flight
Bar-wards at interval; you cannot part
The undead crowd; you must slowly shuffle
Behind. You get served last. It's just not right...
Classical concerts there are scary nights
You're surrounded by zombies, and they're all
Over seventy-five, and should by rights
Not have been let out of the home. Such sights
Aren't pleasant when you've paid, and dressed quite smart
Eccentric oldies, alone, with some light
Shopping in a plastic bag, dickie heart
And worst, a persistent cough. They ALL start
To clear their rheumy lungs when silence falls
Between symphonic movements. The slow flight
Bar-wards at interval; you cannot part
The undead crowd; you must slowly shuffle
Behind. You get served last. It's just not right...
Wednesday 29 September 2010
1486 - A look back at the mid-life crisis
A survey has shown the mid-life crisis
Starts early these days - high expectations
And dashed dreams hit home by the mid-thirties
Often, it's unsuccessful relations
With partners that causes aggravation
Sometimes the opposite - feeling lonely
Sometimes it's working long hours; in Britain
This is common - here we are too greedy
Hence the rat race, which leads to mentally
Afflicted people. Their time off with stress
Costs the economy twenty billion
There they go again - all about money
Forget money! If, instead, happiness
Was the goal, we'd worry less, just have fun
Starts early these days - high expectations
And dashed dreams hit home by the mid-thirties
Often, it's unsuccessful relations
With partners that causes aggravation
Sometimes the opposite - feeling lonely
Sometimes it's working long hours; in Britain
This is common - here we are too greedy
Hence the rat race, which leads to mentally
Afflicted people. Their time off with stress
Costs the economy twenty billion
There they go again - all about money
Forget money! If, instead, happiness
Was the goal, we'd worry less, just have fun
1485 - Dawning of a new era
In Bosworth field the roses grow...but where
Is this field? The historians dispute
It's south of Market Bosworth, Leicestershire
But exactly where, history is mute
You'd think there'd be some relics buried there
The usual plate armour, pieces of bone
Use metal detectors and other gear
To find the spot that Shakespeare made his own
'My kingdom for a horse' the royal moan
From Richard of Gloucester, the usurper
The two young princes murdered by this brute
So Henry Tudor's spin doctors have shown
Though we can't be certain, it may be fair
He was removed - the last Plantagenet
Tue 28 September
Is this field? The historians dispute
It's south of Market Bosworth, Leicestershire
But exactly where, history is mute
You'd think there'd be some relics buried there
The usual plate armour, pieces of bone
Use metal detectors and other gear
To find the spot that Shakespeare made his own
'My kingdom for a horse' the royal moan
From Richard of Gloucester, the usurper
The two young princes murdered by this brute
So Henry Tudor's spin doctors have shown
Though we can't be certain, it may be fair
He was removed - the last Plantagenet
Tue 28 September
Monday 27 September 2010
1484 - Brothers in arms
The Labour Conference here in Manchester
Was newsworthy before it quite began
The leadership election brought drama
When the narrow choice was Ed Miliband
Over the favourite, David, ex-Foreign
Secretary, the establishment choice
Diane Abbott, Ed Balls, Andy Burnham
All left for dead; just those Miliband boys
Battling it out, too close to call. The voice
Called ‘Ed!’ and Dave was a tragic figure
Should he have stood against old Gordon Brown?
Dave’s wife in tears today, the whole thing poised
For more drama; tomorrow’s theatre
Will be Ed’s maiden speech. Is he the man?
Was newsworthy before it quite began
The leadership election brought drama
When the narrow choice was Ed Miliband
Over the favourite, David, ex-Foreign
Secretary, the establishment choice
Diane Abbott, Ed Balls, Andy Burnham
All left for dead; just those Miliband boys
Battling it out, too close to call. The voice
Called ‘Ed!’ and Dave was a tragic figure
Should he have stood against old Gordon Brown?
Dave’s wife in tears today, the whole thing poised
For more drama; tomorrow’s theatre
Will be Ed’s maiden speech. Is he the man?
Sunday 26 September 2010
1483 - Sunday sketch
I watched the Sunday political shows
On TV, then I rode my bicycle
To Salford Quays, where swimmers nearly froze
In the first ‘Great Salford Swim’ - the quays full
Of all sizes of wet-suited people
A weird sight; then to the museum
Of war on the opposite bank; it’s full
Of relics of world conflicts. I heard mums
Telling their kids how Hitler was a scum-
Bag (which he was), but Stalin, Mao and those
Were just as bad. Mosley, he hoped to fill
Mussolini’s role in Britain. Saw some
Classical music tonight; I fear those
Concerts may die out as their fans grow old
On TV, then I rode my bicycle
To Salford Quays, where swimmers nearly froze
In the first ‘Great Salford Swim’ - the quays full
Of all sizes of wet-suited people
A weird sight; then to the museum
Of war on the opposite bank; it’s full
Of relics of world conflicts. I heard mums
Telling their kids how Hitler was a scum-
Bag (which he was), but Stalin, Mao and those
Were just as bad. Mosley, he hoped to fill
Mussolini’s role in Britain. Saw some
Classical music tonight; I fear those
Concerts may die out as their fans grow old
Saturday 25 September 2010
1482 - Two English hills, one Irish hill recalled
There is a green hill not so far away
Well, two, in fact, that rise out of the plain
Both wooded hills topped with castles, like they
Belong not in Cheshire, but maybe Spain
Or Germany. On a clear day, it’s vain
To deny that Beeston and Peckforton
Castles aren’t worth a visit. The first-named
Is from around 1300, ruined
Now, but on such a tall outcrop, you’re stunned
By views of eight counties; looking one way,
The Pennines; the other, Welsh hills are seen
Reminds me of Carrowkeel in Ireland
Green panoramas, distant hills of grey
Ben Bulben, near Sligo, and the Midlands
Well, two, in fact, that rise out of the plain
Both wooded hills topped with castles, like they
Belong not in Cheshire, but maybe Spain
Or Germany. On a clear day, it’s vain
To deny that Beeston and Peckforton
Castles aren’t worth a visit. The first-named
Is from around 1300, ruined
Now, but on such a tall outcrop, you’re stunned
By views of eight counties; looking one way,
The Pennines; the other, Welsh hills are seen
Reminds me of Carrowkeel in Ireland
Green panoramas, distant hills of grey
Ben Bulben, near Sligo, and the Midlands
Friday 24 September 2010
1481 - Harem scarem
We forget that the Ottoman Empire
Ruled by the Turkish Osman dynasty
Lasted an age, more than six hundred years
Its capital, Constantinople, the
Former Byzantine capital city
On the Bosporus’ European side
Facing Anatolia, now Turkey
The Osmans replaced the Seljuks whose pride
Was avenging the Crusades’ genocide
Influenced by east and west, Turkish fire
Terrorised Christians both by land and sea
The length of the Mediterranean tide
Italy’s shores, Vienna’s gates the higher
Reach of their scimitar technology
Ruled by the Turkish Osman dynasty
Lasted an age, more than six hundred years
Its capital, Constantinople, the
Former Byzantine capital city
On the Bosporus’ European side
Facing Anatolia, now Turkey
The Osmans replaced the Seljuks whose pride
Was avenging the Crusades’ genocide
Influenced by east and west, Turkish fire
Terrorised Christians both by land and sea
The length of the Mediterranean tide
Italy’s shores, Vienna’s gates the higher
Reach of their scimitar technology
Thursday 23 September 2010
1480 - Thumbprint
My thumb’s still sore from last Saturday night
Can’t do press-ups then…Huh - any excuse!
It’s getting better all the time, alright
Tomorrow I might be a little use
On the guitar, but tonight it’s the blues
Courtesy of Joni, except it seems
Like all artists of note that she could lose
Herself in her own ego, singing themes
Of self above all else; no wonder dreams
Of love were dashed, and all songs are of flight
Perhaps it’s with jealousy I accuse
Just passing time until I watch a film
With Pearl, my older girl, back from the States
With stories and lots of skyscraping views
Can’t do press-ups then…Huh - any excuse!
It’s getting better all the time, alright
Tomorrow I might be a little use
On the guitar, but tonight it’s the blues
Courtesy of Joni, except it seems
Like all artists of note that she could lose
Herself in her own ego, singing themes
Of self above all else; no wonder dreams
Of love were dashed, and all songs are of flight
Perhaps it’s with jealousy I accuse
Just passing time until I watch a film
With Pearl, my older girl, back from the States
With stories and lots of skyscraping views
Wednesday 22 September 2010
1479 - This flight tonight
Warm rain fell as the autumn dark came down
I walked on to the accompaniment
Of music on headphones, its soothing sound
Like syrup to the ears, voice of dissent
Against people’s real indifference
Relighting my fire, taking that phrase
Opening creaky doors of inner sense
Revealing unknown lovers, future days
My outer shell then melts and my soul sprays
Over the rooftops, swallowed by the moon
Reflecting on the heads of those who went
Along my route in two or three decades
Past the circular library, around
Its magnificent stone circumference
I walked on to the accompaniment
Of music on headphones, its soothing sound
Like syrup to the ears, voice of dissent
Against people’s real indifference
Relighting my fire, taking that phrase
Opening creaky doors of inner sense
Revealing unknown lovers, future days
My outer shell then melts and my soul sprays
Over the rooftops, swallowed by the moon
Reflecting on the heads of those who went
Along my route in two or three decades
Past the circular library, around
Its magnificent stone circumference
Tuesday 21 September 2010
1478 - Russian in a rush
Someone who left their mark upon the map -
Ivan III, also known as 'The Great'
He expanded Russia - he couldn't stop
Leaving in his wake an enormous state
And in this year of 1478
He subdued Novgorod, a large rival
And other lands gobbled up from his plate -
Lithuania, Rostov, Tver, Yaroslavl
Of Ivans, he wasn't the most evil
But he went from Archduke to Tsar, this crop
Of lands making him a player. Subjugate
All opponents, but keep your head level
And you can be like Ivan: you can flop
Onto a regal four-poster at night
Ivan III, also known as 'The Great'
He expanded Russia - he couldn't stop
Leaving in his wake an enormous state
And in this year of 1478
He subdued Novgorod, a large rival
And other lands gobbled up from his plate -
Lithuania, Rostov, Tver, Yaroslavl
Of Ivans, he wasn't the most evil
But he went from Archduke to Tsar, this crop
Of lands making him a player. Subjugate
All opponents, but keep your head level
And you can be like Ivan: you can flop
Onto a regal four-poster at night
Monday 20 September 2010
1477 - It may have been a very good year
The year 1477 was
Significant for two events at least
Charles The Bold of Burgundy lost the cause
And his life. His lands in the Low Countries
Passed to the Holy Roman Empire, freed
From France’s outstretched fingers, where they lie
Later coveted by Spain, but the speed
Of mercantile growth outreached Philip’s ties
That’s still way in the future, though, so I
Will return to ’77, ’cos
That was also when Caxton’s printing press
Produced the first book in English to fly
Tentatively to attentive fingers
A snack that soon would turn into a feast
Significant for two events at least
Charles The Bold of Burgundy lost the cause
And his life. His lands in the Low Countries
Passed to the Holy Roman Empire, freed
From France’s outstretched fingers, where they lie
Later coveted by Spain, but the speed
Of mercantile growth outreached Philip’s ties
That’s still way in the future, though, so I
Will return to ’77, ’cos
That was also when Caxton’s printing press
Produced the first book in English to fly
Tentatively to attentive fingers
A snack that soon would turn into a feast
Sunday 19 September 2010
1476 - The demon drunk
Writing this isn’t helping this headache
That’s most likely caused by dehydration
Strange it’s lasted all day though; couldn’t make
It go away. No time to eat, and some
Serious driving to and from London
Wouldn’t have helped either. Louis is now
Living in a smart new place; yes, he’s gone
From mine - I’m on my own again - but how
Much cheaper it will be! He will allow
Me that joke - he thinks spending’s a mistake!
I spent a lot last night but had good fun
From what I can remember anyhow
Even though I tripped on the road and scraped
Knee, elbow and ribs, and bent back my thumb
That’s most likely caused by dehydration
Strange it’s lasted all day though; couldn’t make
It go away. No time to eat, and some
Serious driving to and from London
Wouldn’t have helped either. Louis is now
Living in a smart new place; yes, he’s gone
From mine - I’m on my own again - but how
Much cheaper it will be! He will allow
Me that joke - he thinks spending’s a mistake!
I spent a lot last night but had good fun
From what I can remember anyhow
Even though I tripped on the road and scraped
Knee, elbow and ribs, and bent back my thumb
Saturday 18 September 2010
1475 - Chester 'nother day
Rain all you like, you can’t stop enjoyment
Of me and Josie driving here and there
Free spirits, me in my forties, still bent
On exploration and learning, and her
Still seven and a half, but seeing there
Is more out there than cul-de-sacs and rules
On how to dress and talk and cut your hair
I missed the turning and went into Wales
We found a Greek café and ate our meals
Then, while the Pope’s still here, was it now meant
To go to Holywell, holy water
On our doorstep, but this miracle failed
Because of ongoing refurbishment
Instead I showed her medieval Chester
Of me and Josie driving here and there
Free spirits, me in my forties, still bent
On exploration and learning, and her
Still seven and a half, but seeing there
Is more out there than cul-de-sacs and rules
On how to dress and talk and cut your hair
I missed the turning and went into Wales
We found a Greek café and ate our meals
Then, while the Pope’s still here, was it now meant
To go to Holywell, holy water
On our doorstep, but this miracle failed
Because of ongoing refurbishment
Instead I showed her medieval Chester
Friday 17 September 2010
1474 - Poem about stuff
Today I woke up and I ate breakfast
I went to the toilet and went outside
I walked to work and at my desk I sat
Chatting to colleagues, reflecting with pride
On yesterday’s meeting. They said that I’d
Chaired it well. At lunchtime, off out again
Where there were trees and cars and stuff I spied
There always are things to look at, and then
If you turn your head, even more things. When
You listen, you hear noises. Cars speed past
With a vroom and a beep. Some people died
Today, probably, but maybe some born
To balance it out. Anyway, at last
The last line’s here, and hey, guess what? I’m tired!
I went to the toilet and went outside
I walked to work and at my desk I sat
Chatting to colleagues, reflecting with pride
On yesterday’s meeting. They said that I’d
Chaired it well. At lunchtime, off out again
Where there were trees and cars and stuff I spied
There always are things to look at, and then
If you turn your head, even more things. When
You listen, you hear noises. Cars speed past
With a vroom and a beep. Some people died
Today, probably, but maybe some born
To balance it out. Anyway, at last
The last line’s here, and hey, guess what? I’m tired!
Thursday 16 September 2010
1473 - Purple papal people
Scotland’s all excited by the visit
To Edinburgh and then to Glasgow
Of old, conservative Pope Benedict
He lands by plane wearing his robes of snow
The Popemobile driver knows where to go
To Bellahouston Park, in ’82
The scene of John Paul Two’s mass, and although
There’s not so many this time, there’s a few
Thousand, waving their flags, hullabaloo
In the air, suffused with holy spirit
At least most of them would like to think so
And so they forget the negative news
Disturbing thoughts swept under the carpet
And only twenty pounds to see the show
To Edinburgh and then to Glasgow
Of old, conservative Pope Benedict
He lands by plane wearing his robes of snow
The Popemobile driver knows where to go
To Bellahouston Park, in ’82
The scene of John Paul Two’s mass, and although
There’s not so many this time, there’s a few
Thousand, waving their flags, hullabaloo
In the air, suffused with holy spirit
At least most of them would like to think so
And so they forget the negative news
Disturbing thoughts swept under the carpet
And only twenty pounds to see the show
Wednesday 15 September 2010
1472 - Forever blowing Bubbles
I’ve just watched ‘Michael Jackson and Bubbles -
The Untold Story’… a documentary
On Channel 4, a sad modern fable
Of pet abandonment. Maturity
Can cause a pet to lose its charm. We see
Stray dogs on streets, sad-eyed, noses in bags
Hunting food scraps, expelled from families
It happened to this famous chimp. Time drags
Sat in his cage. The human memories nag
But now he must go ape again; he falls
From stardom to mere anonymity
But though the chat show days are past, eyes sag
And chin is lined with grey, where is Michael?
The King of Pop lies in the cemetery
The Untold Story’… a documentary
On Channel 4, a sad modern fable
Of pet abandonment. Maturity
Can cause a pet to lose its charm. We see
Stray dogs on streets, sad-eyed, noses in bags
Hunting food scraps, expelled from families
It happened to this famous chimp. Time drags
Sat in his cage. The human memories nag
But now he must go ape again; he falls
From stardom to mere anonymity
But though the chat show days are past, eyes sag
And chin is lined with grey, where is Michael?
The King of Pop lies in the cemetery
Tuesday 14 September 2010
1471 - Man in the tree
I saw my shadowed head against the tree
In the dark night, by kitchen light backlit
As I stood smoking on the balcony
A magnified dark head that seemed to sit
Among the leaves and branches. I moved it
From side to side to check that it was mine
But it wasn’t mine; more like the spirit
Of the tree, revealed by the magic shine
Of a long life bulb; transported in time
Back to some pagan Bronze Age century
A god reborn, its one leg and arms knit
Into a sentient being, tall and fine
Green and brown sentinel, security
Watching over this patch I inhabit
In the dark night, by kitchen light backlit
As I stood smoking on the balcony
A magnified dark head that seemed to sit
Among the leaves and branches. I moved it
From side to side to check that it was mine
But it wasn’t mine; more like the spirit
Of the tree, revealed by the magic shine
Of a long life bulb; transported in time
Back to some pagan Bronze Age century
A god reborn, its one leg and arms knit
Into a sentient being, tall and fine
Green and brown sentinel, security
Watching over this patch I inhabit
Monday 13 September 2010
1470 - The right to shout 'Fire!' in a crowded office
I attended a fire and safety course
Today, so now I know in more depth how
To spray those various fire extinguishers
And when to and when not to, for you know
Water won’t put out burning liquids, though
Foam or CO2 might do. It’s all there
In confusing detail, but don’t be slow
Reading the instructions if there’s a fire
Or you might augment your work’s funeral pyre
With your smoking remains. We’re not heroes
Just incident marshals; we help them go
To the small staircase, for the central stairs
Can get crowded if all the workforce pours
Down them all at once: pile-ups may ensue
Today, so now I know in more depth how
To spray those various fire extinguishers
And when to and when not to, for you know
Water won’t put out burning liquids, though
Foam or CO2 might do. It’s all there
In confusing detail, but don’t be slow
Reading the instructions if there’s a fire
Or you might augment your work’s funeral pyre
With your smoking remains. We’re not heroes
Just incident marshals; we help them go
To the small staircase, for the central stairs
Can get crowded if all the workforce pours
Down them all at once: pile-ups may ensue
Sunday 12 September 2010
1469 - On the eve of a trade union conference, Manchester
The coming week sees new battle lines drawn
Or rather, old ones redrawn. The Punic
And the World Wars saw history reborn
And repeated; the Crusades’ dynamic
With Ground Zero as crucible; new sticks
To beat the enemy; Fox News reports
An unknown man who wants to burn some books
And a new mosque two blocks from where black thoughts
Rose yesterday; these conflicts and these wars
Reignite with the spark of markets down
Hard times and exploitation work this trick
In all times and places. Manchester fought
Against the landed gentry at the dawn
Of industry; once more, the unions speak
Or rather, old ones redrawn. The Punic
And the World Wars saw history reborn
And repeated; the Crusades’ dynamic
With Ground Zero as crucible; new sticks
To beat the enemy; Fox News reports
An unknown man who wants to burn some books
And a new mosque two blocks from where black thoughts
Rose yesterday; these conflicts and these wars
Reignite with the spark of markets down
Hard times and exploitation work this trick
In all times and places. Manchester fought
Against the landed gentry at the dawn
Of industry; once more, the unions speak
1468 - From Salford to Lyme Park and back again
A busy day and night comes to a close
First thing, I emailed Alan Morrison
Then I helped Louis scan and email those
Documents his new landlord wanted on
Time, from Pendleton Library. When son
Was dropped off at the cinema, I sat
With coffee and morning paper; saw some
Stuff on Carla Bruni. Free entry at
National Trust sites today. Lyme Park is that
Place where the TV ‘Pride and Prejudice’
Was filmed. Me and Josie we had some fun
In and out of that grand old house, despite
Several short sharp showers and muddy clothes
Evening with Pearl, watching ‘Paris, je t’aime’
First thing, I emailed Alan Morrison
Then I helped Louis scan and email those
Documents his new landlord wanted on
Time, from Pendleton Library. When son
Was dropped off at the cinema, I sat
With coffee and morning paper; saw some
Stuff on Carla Bruni. Free entry at
National Trust sites today. Lyme Park is that
Place where the TV ‘Pride and Prejudice’
Was filmed. Me and Josie we had some fun
In and out of that grand old house, despite
Several short sharp showers and muddy clothes
Evening with Pearl, watching ‘Paris, je t’aime’
Friday 10 September 2010
1467 - Portrait of a pope
Pope Paul II (his real name Peter)
Was a gay fellow, or so it was said
Around the Vatican were repeated
Scurrilous rumours, by his rivals spread
God knows those holy types, like us were fed
By jealousy - human, all too human
When printing presses were wheeled in, this led
To those paid well for writing bull by hand
Sorry, bulls - papal bulls. Paul seemed to plan
Everything secretly, so to meet the
Pope was almost impossible; his red
Robed cardinals, they sought him here, there and
Everywhere. But he was fond of theatre
And to the horse racing in Rome he sped
Was a gay fellow, or so it was said
Around the Vatican were repeated
Scurrilous rumours, by his rivals spread
God knows those holy types, like us were fed
By jealousy - human, all too human
When printing presses were wheeled in, this led
To those paid well for writing bull by hand
Sorry, bulls - papal bulls. Paul seemed to plan
Everything secretly, so to meet the
Pope was almost impossible; his red
Robed cardinals, they sought him here, there and
Everywhere. But he was fond of theatre
And to the horse racing in Rome he sped
Thursday 9 September 2010
1466 - How do you sleep (when you're sober)?
It's hard going to sleep without a beer
Or two or three to bring drowsiness on
Trying to skip the juice and sleep sober
Is OK once the second night's begun
But the first night (last night), brain overrun
With lively thought that reading cannot quell
Even Racine's play 'bout Agamemnon
As a lullaby, ineffectual
I put it down, the late hour pretty well
Demanding that I doze off, as quite near
Was the time I'd have to get up again
To see the solicitor who would tell
Me about consent orders; causing fear
Unable to relax, the hours ground on...
Or two or three to bring drowsiness on
Trying to skip the juice and sleep sober
Is OK once the second night's begun
But the first night (last night), brain overrun
With lively thought that reading cannot quell
Even Racine's play 'bout Agamemnon
As a lullaby, ineffectual
I put it down, the late hour pretty well
Demanding that I doze off, as quite near
Was the time I'd have to get up again
To see the solicitor who would tell
Me about consent orders; causing fear
Unable to relax, the hours ground on...
Wednesday 8 September 2010
1465 - String driven thing
I recently had a strap put on my
Old acoustic guitar, and now I can
Practice standing up, which I couldn’t try
Before. The best performers often stand
Though classical ones rarely do; their hands
Are so busy I guess they have to sit
And see the fretboard; the audience demands
No errors in that genre, but to complete
Each piece precisely. In jazz and rock it
Is easier because the hands can fly
Anywhere and even bum notes can stand
As an experimental kind of art
As though you’re too good to play normally
But acoustics weed out the charlatan
Old acoustic guitar, and now I can
Practice standing up, which I couldn’t try
Before. The best performers often stand
Though classical ones rarely do; their hands
Are so busy I guess they have to sit
And see the fretboard; the audience demands
No errors in that genre, but to complete
Each piece precisely. In jazz and rock it
Is easier because the hands can fly
Anywhere and even bum notes can stand
As an experimental kind of art
As though you’re too good to play normally
But acoustics weed out the charlatan
Tuesday 7 September 2010
1464 - If Lampard plays, England lose
A second England victory and so
It seems certain the whites will qualify
For Euro 2012, when they will go
To Poland and Ukraine, and there they’ll try
Not to play like clowns and to justify
The usual media hype. Because Lampard
Picked up a mild injury recently
Playing for Chelsea, it has not been hard
To see the improvement. And Steve Gerrard
Scored twice against Hungary when the no
Longer effective fat Frank said bye bye
At half-time. Capello, read the cards!
Leave Lampard out and we might even crow
At long last about winning a trophy
It seems certain the whites will qualify
For Euro 2012, when they will go
To Poland and Ukraine, and there they’ll try
Not to play like clowns and to justify
The usual media hype. Because Lampard
Picked up a mild injury recently
Playing for Chelsea, it has not been hard
To see the improvement. And Steve Gerrard
Scored twice against Hungary when the no
Longer effective fat Frank said bye bye
At half-time. Capello, read the cards!
Leave Lampard out and we might even crow
At long last about winning a trophy
Monday 6 September 2010
1463 - Whatever happened to...?
In 1461 François Villon
Wrote Le Grand Testament, but two years on
Like all of us, his fate was to be gone
Whether dead or no, no-one knows, but one
Can't help but wonder if he still lived on
Up to no good, judging by what had gone
Before; like snows of yesteryear, Villon
Melted, though remembered a century on
And ever since then, his known works have gone
Into books, plays and films, so he's now one
Of the most famous of his time, Villon
Writer and thief, his low-life set down on
Parchment, before he was to gallows gone
Saved from the rope because he knew someone
Wrote Le Grand Testament, but two years on
Like all of us, his fate was to be gone
Whether dead or no, no-one knows, but one
Can't help but wonder if he still lived on
Up to no good, judging by what had gone
Before; like snows of yesteryear, Villon
Melted, though remembered a century on
And ever since then, his known works have gone
Into books, plays and films, so he's now one
Of the most famous of his time, Villon
Writer and thief, his low-life set down on
Parchment, before he was to gallows gone
Saved from the rope because he knew someone
Sunday 5 September 2010
1462 - Lancashire thankyoushire
A sunny day. I donned my shorts and T-
Shirt, and sat down to watch the Sunday shows
Like Andrew Marr, Sunday Live, and Country
Tracks (today, the Lancashire coast); saw those
Sculptures on Crosby Beach, showing their toes
And groins and whatnot, some with barnacles
All looking to sea. Further up the coast
They showed, inevitably, brash Blackpool’s
Illuminations, and those trams, their wheels
Impressively multi-coloured; then the
Midland Hotel, Morecambe, which once more glows
Bright white, well now and then when sunlight falls
Over the no man’s land of the bay. We
Really should visit these places, you know
Shirt, and sat down to watch the Sunday shows
Like Andrew Marr, Sunday Live, and Country
Tracks (today, the Lancashire coast); saw those
Sculptures on Crosby Beach, showing their toes
And groins and whatnot, some with barnacles
All looking to sea. Further up the coast
They showed, inevitably, brash Blackpool’s
Illuminations, and those trams, their wheels
Impressively multi-coloured; then the
Midland Hotel, Morecambe, which once more glows
Bright white, well now and then when sunlight falls
Over the no man’s land of the bay. We
Really should visit these places, you know
Saturday 4 September 2010
1461 - La vie (et le mort) en rose
The year 1461 was bloody
Well, not the year itself, a mere concept
I mean thousands of blood-spattered bodies
Were found all round the fields, rivers and steps
Of late medieval England, as they stepped
Up the War of the Roses. All it was
Was a fight for predominance by top
Dogs and bitches, falling out, fighting wars
In which many poorer folk, for this cause
Ended up dead. Dick Neville (Warwick the
Kingmaker) supported York, and then crept
Over to Margaret’s Lancs side when Ed IV’s
Friendship was gone, and he restored Henry
The Sixth once more, but more war followed next
Well, not the year itself, a mere concept
I mean thousands of blood-spattered bodies
Were found all round the fields, rivers and steps
Of late medieval England, as they stepped
Up the War of the Roses. All it was
Was a fight for predominance by top
Dogs and bitches, falling out, fighting wars
In which many poorer folk, for this cause
Ended up dead. Dick Neville (Warwick the
Kingmaker) supported York, and then crept
Over to Margaret’s Lancs side when Ed IV’s
Friendship was gone, and he restored Henry
The Sixth once more, but more war followed next
Friday 3 September 2010
1460 - Bolton wanderings
The town of Bolton is the place to go
If you want to see all shades of vomit
Staining the pavement, including shadows
Of vomit from last week, or just last night
Stockport, it has to be said, does alright
In this regard, as does Oldham, Rochdale
And even posher Macclesfield, but quite
The best in street decor using cheap ale
Splashed all around with Pollock-like detail
After regurgitation, so it shows
That bit longer, can be found in the streets
Of Bolton. Let me take your hand; we'll sail
On pools of puke with little undertow
These filthy pavements make you want to spit!
If you want to see all shades of vomit
Staining the pavement, including shadows
Of vomit from last week, or just last night
Stockport, it has to be said, does alright
In this regard, as does Oldham, Rochdale
And even posher Macclesfield, but quite
The best in street decor using cheap ale
Splashed all around with Pollock-like detail
After regurgitation, so it shows
That bit longer, can be found in the streets
Of Bolton. Let me take your hand; we'll sail
On pools of puke with little undertow
These filthy pavements make you want to spit!
1459 - Bolton is molten
I didn’t drive to the gig in Bolton
Tonight. No, I caught the train there and back
This enabled me to get some pints in
And actually enjoy knocking them back
I quite enjoyed the evening - some good craic
Good performances all round at the mic
A decent soundman the night didn’t lack
I read four new poems they seemed to like
The bar was OK too. Maybe my bike
Could be used to get to gigs more often
When some distance from home… But back on track
The train trundled us to Manchester. Like
To finish this now so I can flop on
To my bed and let everything go black
Thursday 2 September
Tonight. No, I caught the train there and back
This enabled me to get some pints in
And actually enjoy knocking them back
I quite enjoyed the evening - some good craic
Good performances all round at the mic
A decent soundman the night didn’t lack
I read four new poems they seemed to like
The bar was OK too. Maybe my bike
Could be used to get to gigs more often
When some distance from home… But back on track
The train trundled us to Manchester. Like
To finish this now so I can flop on
To my bed and let everything go black
Thursday 2 September
Wednesday 1 September 2010
1458 - This duke knew his shit
Been reading the Maxims of Rochefoucauld
His main point recurs again and again
That all our motivations are below
Our self-love - that’s the driving force of man
We work towards our happiness less than
We work to make others think we’re happy
We criticise ourselves publicly when
We want to gain in popularity
And those who are bored by us, always we
Are so bored by them, to save our ego
From accepting a lower place than them
He was a leader of society
In seventeenth century France, a beau
Of the ancien régime, proudest of men
His main point recurs again and again
That all our motivations are below
Our self-love - that’s the driving force of man
We work towards our happiness less than
We work to make others think we’re happy
We criticise ourselves publicly when
We want to gain in popularity
And those who are bored by us, always we
Are so bored by them, to save our ego
From accepting a lower place than them
He was a leader of society
In seventeenth century France, a beau
Of the ancien régime, proudest of men
Tuesday 31 August 2010
1457 - The inherent sexism of public urination
They say never walk under a ladder
Or something might fall down upon your head
But what’s worse is when you’ve a full bladder
And there’s no public lavatory ahead
It’s easier for a man’s load to be shed
I’ve seen it done by football supporters
In full view of a city’s teeming crowd
Or drunk blokes late at night; steaming rivers
That trickle down the walls into gutters
But for agonised females, far harder
They can’t wee standing up, not if well-bred
And if they tried, imagine how coppers
Would throw them in the van after knicker
Repositioning; a scene girls all dread
Or something might fall down upon your head
But what’s worse is when you’ve a full bladder
And there’s no public lavatory ahead
It’s easier for a man’s load to be shed
I’ve seen it done by football supporters
In full view of a city’s teeming crowd
Or drunk blokes late at night; steaming rivers
That trickle down the walls into gutters
But for agonised females, far harder
They can’t wee standing up, not if well-bred
And if they tried, imagine how coppers
Would throw them in the van after knicker
Repositioning; a scene girls all dread
Monday 30 August 2010
1456 - Summer unmourned
It felt cold last night as autumn returned
Like some unloved relative come to stay
But there’s something that I’ve gradually learned
And that is that when summer goes away
It’s no longer the death of seaside spray
Of ice cream cones, blue skies, glamorous nights
Though evening light far sooner fades to grey
The other things aren’t lost or out of sight
There’s more blue sky in winter; low sunlight
Blinding the driver as a bend is turned
October’s the month for a holiday
Not costly, cloudy August, when your flight
And room are double. Schoolkids are concerned
At school’s return, true, but not you or I
Like some unloved relative come to stay
But there’s something that I’ve gradually learned
And that is that when summer goes away
It’s no longer the death of seaside spray
Of ice cream cones, blue skies, glamorous nights
Though evening light far sooner fades to grey
The other things aren’t lost or out of sight
There’s more blue sky in winter; low sunlight
Blinding the driver as a bend is turned
October’s the month for a holiday
Not costly, cloudy August, when your flight
And room are double. Schoolkids are concerned
At school’s return, true, but not you or I
Sunday 29 August 2010
1455 - Tired of flat tyres
All went well in today’s Sunday sunshine
Until my rear right tyre went pop, then flat
And only yesterday London was mine
I drove there and drove back. Now I know that
We were lucky, but fortune’s wheel is not
So inefficient as to always spin
For me, and can be punctured on a spot
Of glass in Manchester or in London
And after that I can’t keep on winning
So I drove with this flat tyre, trying to find
Somewhere to park, maybe outside my flat
But that’s too far to get to… then within
My mind flits an idea: make a bee-line
For Cedric’s Garage. That’s where my car’s sat…
Until my rear right tyre went pop, then flat
And only yesterday London was mine
I drove there and drove back. Now I know that
We were lucky, but fortune’s wheel is not
So inefficient as to always spin
For me, and can be punctured on a spot
Of glass in Manchester or in London
And after that I can’t keep on winning
So I drove with this flat tyre, trying to find
Somewhere to park, maybe outside my flat
But that’s too far to get to… then within
My mind flits an idea: make a bee-line
For Cedric’s Garage. That’s where my car’s sat…
Saturday 28 August 2010
1454 - Losing my spurs
Today we went to the penultimate
Football team on our complete stadium tour
We started over ten years ago, mate
And today’s team was Tottenham Hotspur
Playing Wigan, and 0-1 was the score
A surprise win for the bottom-placed team
With only about thirty supporters
Yet those thirty must have thought it a dream
Their manager, Martinez, does now seem
Safe for now from the order of the boot
Yes, he was facing the sack if a poor
Result had happened, but this puts some sheen
On his coaching methods. There’ll be a spate
Of high-scoring games, I predict, this year
Football team on our complete stadium tour
We started over ten years ago, mate
And today’s team was Tottenham Hotspur
Playing Wigan, and 0-1 was the score
A surprise win for the bottom-placed team
With only about thirty supporters
Yet those thirty must have thought it a dream
Their manager, Martinez, does now seem
Safe for now from the order of the boot
Yes, he was facing the sack if a poor
Result had happened, but this puts some sheen
On his coaching methods. There’ll be a spate
Of high-scoring games, I predict, this year
Friday 27 August 2010
1453 - A town like Constantinople
In 1453 the Byzantine
Empire fell to the mighty Ottoman
Forces on land and sea, and the front line
Of the Christian / Muslim conflict was on
A westward retreat once more, till Don John
Won at Lepanto, sinking Turkish ships
Like shooting fish in a net. And England
Meanwhile, in ’53, finally let slip
Its Hundred Years War gains and lost all grip
Of Normandy and South West France, declined
To Calais town, its final possession
And finally, this year, the printing trip
Took off with Johnny Gutenberg, a sign
Of progress and of books for everyone
Empire fell to the mighty Ottoman
Forces on land and sea, and the front line
Of the Christian / Muslim conflict was on
A westward retreat once more, till Don John
Won at Lepanto, sinking Turkish ships
Like shooting fish in a net. And England
Meanwhile, in ’53, finally let slip
Its Hundred Years War gains and lost all grip
Of Normandy and South West France, declined
To Calais town, its final possession
And finally, this year, the printing trip
Took off with Johnny Gutenberg, a sign
Of progress and of books for everyone
Thursday 26 August 2010
1452 - Abroad thoughts from home
I can’t think of much that’s happened today
I’m back in England, back at work, it’s true
As time goes on th’ impulse to get away
Gets stronger and stronger the longer you
Live, and also if you’ve a bob or two
Then what’s better to do than fly somewhere
Some other patch of land where houses do
Not look quite the same as at home, and their
Way of talking’s so strange, their face and hair
Is somehow different from those down your way
Phone boxes are red at home; there, they’re blue
And the mad way they drive’s enough to scare
The shit out of you. But you better pray
You packed your passport. Where is it? Oh poo!
I’m back in England, back at work, it’s true
As time goes on th’ impulse to get away
Gets stronger and stronger the longer you
Live, and also if you’ve a bob or two
Then what’s better to do than fly somewhere
Some other patch of land where houses do
Not look quite the same as at home, and their
Way of talking’s so strange, their face and hair
Is somehow different from those down your way
Phone boxes are red at home; there, they’re blue
And the mad way they drive’s enough to scare
The shit out of you. But you better pray
You packed your passport. Where is it? Oh poo!
Wednesday 25 August 2010
1451 - Cleared for take-off
No sleep last night that I can quite recall
And so in fact I’m knackered, cream crackered
I smoked and drank so much I thought I’d fall
Into a sleep too deep to be conquered
By my phone’s alarm. Needn’t have bothered
Setting it. Spent the night fretting I’d miss
That train to catch my plane home from abroad
Plus all the normal night disturbances
That shared dorms guarantee; late night pisses
Lights left on, locker doors crashed; all dreams stalled
On the runway, their take-off aborted
But more importantly, the main thing is
I didn’t miss my plane home, seeing all
Of South Yorkshire below, green and chequered
And so in fact I’m knackered, cream crackered
I smoked and drank so much I thought I’d fall
Into a sleep too deep to be conquered
By my phone’s alarm. Needn’t have bothered
Setting it. Spent the night fretting I’d miss
That train to catch my plane home from abroad
Plus all the normal night disturbances
That shared dorms guarantee; late night pisses
Lights left on, locker doors crashed; all dreams stalled
On the runway, their take-off aborted
But more importantly, the main thing is
I didn’t miss my plane home, seeing all
Of South Yorkshire below, green and chequered
Tuesday 24 August 2010
1450 - Orange country
My second full day in the Netherlands
I woke up late after the night before
Where, in Durty Nelly's, I had watched Man
City beat Liverpool, then gone out for
A couple of late smokes. Today was more
About going to Delft. I caught the train
And saw the Dutch landscape; the upper floor
Gave good views of Haarlem, Leiden and then
Den Haag, just before Delft, a neat old town
Also built on canals. Water, flat land -
Just like East Anglia. Next, one more tour
Of the Red Light District - I've still not found
Many women in windows where they stand
Showing their wares (but I am now too poor...!)
I woke up late after the night before
Where, in Durty Nelly's, I had watched Man
City beat Liverpool, then gone out for
A couple of late smokes. Today was more
About going to Delft. I caught the train
And saw the Dutch landscape; the upper floor
Gave good views of Haarlem, Leiden and then
Den Haag, just before Delft, a neat old town
Also built on canals. Water, flat land -
Just like East Anglia. Next, one more tour
Of the Red Light District - I've still not found
Many women in windows where they stand
Showing their wares (but I am now too poor...!)
Monday 23 August 2010
1449 - In old Amsterdam
Greetings from Amsterdam, my dear reader
I've almost been here for one whole day now
I've just had my first pint of Amstel beer
And, more importantly, my first tattoo
I've been on the canal cruise boats, and how
Good a way is that to tour the city
First stop, Anne Frank's house, where most tourists go
Then the boat to the Rijksmuseum, the
Rembrandts and Vermeers, Golden Age arty
I then walked round Vondelpark, the inner
City green space of choice; Rembrandt Square, though
I couldn't find the painter's house. The three
Crosses, the symbol of this town, are there
On my arm. Next, a pint, then a smoke. Wow.
I've almost been here for one whole day now
I've just had my first pint of Amstel beer
And, more importantly, my first tattoo
I've been on the canal cruise boats, and how
Good a way is that to tour the city
First stop, Anne Frank's house, where most tourists go
Then the boat to the Rijksmuseum, the
Rembrandts and Vermeers, Golden Age arty
I then walked round Vondelpark, the inner
City green space of choice; Rembrandt Square, though
I couldn't find the painter's house. The three
Crosses, the symbol of this town, are there
On my arm. Next, a pint, then a smoke. Wow.
Sunday 22 August 2010
1448 - The windmills of my mind
I’m off to Amsterdam, I am I am
After this blogging, I’ll be clogging up
And down the old canalside with a pan-
Cake in my hand; Anne Frank-ly, I may stop
And look in her house if the queue has dropped
I hear the coffee’s good; wonder what’s Dutch
For americano with hot milk? Trips
On the canal by boat are also much
Recommended. But why oh why is such
A fuss made about the red lights? I’m damned
If I know. Maybe I will get me up
There, and see. The place has a special touch
And when I come back I will understand
Though I may be groggy and out of step
After this blogging, I’ll be clogging up
And down the old canalside with a pan-
Cake in my hand; Anne Frank-ly, I may stop
And look in her house if the queue has dropped
I hear the coffee’s good; wonder what’s Dutch
For americano with hot milk? Trips
On the canal by boat are also much
Recommended. But why oh why is such
A fuss made about the red lights? I’m damned
If I know. Maybe I will get me up
There, and see. The place has a special touch
And when I come back I will understand
Though I may be groggy and out of step
Saturday 21 August 2010
1447 - A fishy tale
Today I saw two films, one in 3D
The first, in 2D, was Toy Story 3
The second time it was seen by Josie
The second film, Piranha, with Louis
Which was a 3D gore fest, gruesomely
Showing bloodthirsty fish quite grotesquely
Stripping the skin from Yank teens whose party
On an Arizona lake became the
Dream buffet for the saw-toothed. Bikini-
Clad girls turned to skeletons suddenly
Though the cinema was strangely empty
For a Saturday evening, quite early
Admittedly. Back home now, I will see
The result of Coventry v Derby
The first, in 2D, was Toy Story 3
The second time it was seen by Josie
The second film, Piranha, with Louis
Which was a 3D gore fest, gruesomely
Showing bloodthirsty fish quite grotesquely
Stripping the skin from Yank teens whose party
On an Arizona lake became the
Dream buffet for the saw-toothed. Bikini-
Clad girls turned to skeletons suddenly
Though the cinema was strangely empty
For a Saturday evening, quite early
Admittedly. Back home now, I will see
The result of Coventry v Derby
Friday 20 August 2010
1446 - Blarney Schwarzenegger
In 1446 - it’s no blarney -
The Blarney Stone was placed in that high tower
In Blarney, County Cork, in that country
That, like Blarney, sets mere talk that much higher
Than action; makes blarney into art; the
Blarney of those in Blarney’s the acme
Compared to Blighty, Ireland’s conqueror
(It was the Normans, though - it wasn’t me!)
But Blighty’s type of talk’s often mighty
Untrustworthy for me. I like blarney
Obvious blarney can’t be lies. “Drinker!
You’re talking nonsense!” Oh well, bugger me
Now who’d have thought it? A pub in Blarney
Is where to be throughout each long shower
The Blarney Stone was placed in that high tower
In Blarney, County Cork, in that country
That, like Blarney, sets mere talk that much higher
Than action; makes blarney into art; the
Blarney of those in Blarney’s the acme
Compared to Blighty, Ireland’s conqueror
(It was the Normans, though - it wasn’t me!)
But Blighty’s type of talk’s often mighty
Untrustworthy for me. I like blarney
Obvious blarney can’t be lies. “Drinker!
You’re talking nonsense!” Oh well, bugger me
Now who’d have thought it? A pub in Blarney
Is where to be throughout each long shower
Thursday 19 August 2010
1445 - A spot of bother
I hate it when I scratch an unknown spot
It’s agony, and not recommended
When I scratched between my eyebrows, I’d not
Reckoned on the spot being there. ‘Oh shit!’
I thought, but didn’t vocalise, as it
Happened today while sat in the office
Where swearing ain’t no promotion ticket
The kind of place where one can’t say, ‘Oh piss!’
Eyebrows would be raised, and I’d have to kiss
Goodbye to success. Some do lose the plot
At work; they find themselves isolated
And often respond going off with stress
But most are made of sterner stuff than that
A spot of bother shouldn’t flip our lid
It’s agony, and not recommended
When I scratched between my eyebrows, I’d not
Reckoned on the spot being there. ‘Oh shit!’
I thought, but didn’t vocalise, as it
Happened today while sat in the office
Where swearing ain’t no promotion ticket
The kind of place where one can’t say, ‘Oh piss!’
Eyebrows would be raised, and I’d have to kiss
Goodbye to success. Some do lose the plot
At work; they find themselves isolated
And often respond going off with stress
But most are made of sterner stuff than that
A spot of bother shouldn’t flip our lid
Wednesday 18 August 2010
1444 - Albania and Liverpool
In 1444, great Skanderbeg
Was heroically halting the progress
Of the mighty Turkish forces. He begged
In vain for help from popes, yet with his crest
The double-headed eagle, he did best
With scant resources, a Napoleon
A Richard the First, someone who was blessed
With strength and cunning. Though they overran
Little Albania after his death, some
Say he was unparalleled. I had egg
This morning for breakfast at mum’s. The rest
Of the day we spent in Liverpool, on
The famous ferry, and we also checked
Out the Maritime Museum, oh yes.
Was heroically halting the progress
Of the mighty Turkish forces. He begged
In vain for help from popes, yet with his crest
The double-headed eagle, he did best
With scant resources, a Napoleon
A Richard the First, someone who was blessed
With strength and cunning. Though they overran
Little Albania after his death, some
Say he was unparalleled. I had egg
This morning for breakfast at mum’s. The rest
Of the day we spent in Liverpool, on
The famous ferry, and we also checked
Out the Maritime Museum, oh yes.
1443 - Before the night begins
I’m sitting here in Ellie’s Bar, waiting
It doesn’t look like Chris is gonna come
I’ve recognised some faces entering
The door to this specially hired upstairs room
Poetry night is back - it’s starting soon
It’s also a night for acoustic stuff
Guitarists get their guitars out and tune
If I was singing tonight, I’d feel rough
Right now, but no - tonight the pressure’s off
That’s right - tonight it’s just poetry reading
Surely that’s the easiest thing to perform
Unless you’ve learned it all or it’s off-cuff
It’s so hard memorising, ad libbing
So I just read it from the page. Ho hum!
It doesn’t look like Chris is gonna come
I’ve recognised some faces entering
The door to this specially hired upstairs room
Poetry night is back - it’s starting soon
It’s also a night for acoustic stuff
Guitarists get their guitars out and tune
If I was singing tonight, I’d feel rough
Right now, but no - tonight the pressure’s off
That’s right - tonight it’s just poetry reading
Surely that’s the easiest thing to perform
Unless you’ve learned it all or it’s off-cuff
It’s so hard memorising, ad libbing
So I just read it from the page. Ho hum!
Monday 16 August 2010
1442 - Dracul and Dracula
Tonight I am writing of Vlad Dracul
The ruler of Merrie Wallachia
Dracul means ‘dragon’ - and he got the call
From the Catholic military Order
Of the Dragon to help fight the Turks. War
In the far east was ceaseless in those days
Vlad’s son was Vlad ‘Tepes’ (the Impaler)
His nastiness was bad, the legend says
It’s true he stuck invading Turks on stakes
He learned that in Turkey itself, a cruel
Method they used while he was hostage there
As a boy prince. Constantinople stays
Christian till ’53; then Istanbul…
So was Vlad so mad to employ terror?
The ruler of Merrie Wallachia
Dracul means ‘dragon’ - and he got the call
From the Catholic military Order
Of the Dragon to help fight the Turks. War
In the far east was ceaseless in those days
Vlad’s son was Vlad ‘Tepes’ (the Impaler)
His nastiness was bad, the legend says
It’s true he stuck invading Turks on stakes
He learned that in Turkey itself, a cruel
Method they used while he was hostage there
As a boy prince. Constantinople stays
Christian till ’53; then Istanbul…
So was Vlad so mad to employ terror?
Sunday 15 August 2010
1441 - Yellow and green scene
The sky is yellow and the leaves are green
What does this colour combination mean
Or rather, what other things have I seen
That remind me of just yellow and green?
A two point ball on a snooker table
A springtime park or lawn with daffodils
At Carrow Road, Norwich playing football
Looking out from the beach before a squall
The flag of Jamaica, with added black
Parrots that squawk, and maybe ducks that quack
The Orient Express along its track
The markings on a scaly slithery snake
The sky is pink now, the leaves are still green
What does this colour combination mean?
What does this colour combination mean
Or rather, what other things have I seen
That remind me of just yellow and green?
A two point ball on a snooker table
A springtime park or lawn with daffodils
At Carrow Road, Norwich playing football
Looking out from the beach before a squall
The flag of Jamaica, with added black
Parrots that squawk, and maybe ducks that quack
The Orient Express along its track
The markings on a scaly slithery snake
The sky is pink now, the leaves are still green
What does this colour combination mean?
Saturday 14 August 2010
1440 - Closed shop
They’re rounding up the undesirables
In and around Paris, so Sarkozy
Can salvage his party at the next polls
By ethnic cleansing shown on the TV
We’ve seen the separation of babies
From their African mothers and fathers
Women dragged along the street despite pleas
Screams or interventions of protesters
Well now the same’s been done to the Roma
Illegal immigrants: they broke the rules
Throw them out, anywhere (but not GB…
Remember those camps at Calais?) Measures
Must however be taken. The portals
Of Europe are closing, gents and ladies
In and around Paris, so Sarkozy
Can salvage his party at the next polls
By ethnic cleansing shown on the TV
We’ve seen the separation of babies
From their African mothers and fathers
Women dragged along the street despite pleas
Screams or interventions of protesters
Well now the same’s been done to the Roma
Illegal immigrants: they broke the rules
Throw them out, anywhere (but not GB…
Remember those camps at Calais?) Measures
Must however be taken. The portals
Of Europe are closing, gents and ladies
Friday 13 August 2010
1439 - More messy than Lionel
Though women prefer neatness to scruffy
I must admit I don’t care a great deal
My hair, though thinning, is bird’s nest messy
And I usually coat my chin in stubble
This is, however, all explicable
They won’t promote me at work, so why dress
To impress, since it hasn’t worked? Awful
Waste of my time and money. If success
Depended on looks… What? It does? Oh yes
So it does. Also, if women want me
They’ll have me on my terms or not at all
And so let’s see who still likes me, this mess
Who values weird things like honesty
And doing what I want. Typical male…
I must admit I don’t care a great deal
My hair, though thinning, is bird’s nest messy
And I usually coat my chin in stubble
This is, however, all explicable
They won’t promote me at work, so why dress
To impress, since it hasn’t worked? Awful
Waste of my time and money. If success
Depended on looks… What? It does? Oh yes
So it does. Also, if women want me
They’ll have me on my terms or not at all
And so let’s see who still likes me, this mess
Who values weird things like honesty
And doing what I want. Typical male…
Thursday 12 August 2010
1438 - Loretta's complaint
The rain in Spain falls mainly on the plain
The rain in Manchester makes man wetter
In Liverpool the pools slither down drains
In Leeds raindrops like beads drip from sweaters
In Hull the reservoirs are full; s’better
Than the Kalahari or Sahara
But don't mention rain, it will upset her
Who will it upset? Sarah O'Hara
Who I hear is in south Algeria
But here I fear a higher fall of rain
Than in Damietta or Rosetta
Which means without rain land’s inferior
In the desert interior, that’s plain
So don’t complain about rain, Loretta!
The rain in Manchester makes man wetter
In Liverpool the pools slither down drains
In Leeds raindrops like beads drip from sweaters
In Hull the reservoirs are full; s’better
Than the Kalahari or Sahara
But don't mention rain, it will upset her
Who will it upset? Sarah O'Hara
Who I hear is in south Algeria
But here I fear a higher fall of rain
Than in Damietta or Rosetta
Which means without rain land’s inferior
In the desert interior, that’s plain
So don’t complain about rain, Loretta!
Wednesday 11 August 2010
1437 - Summer rain
It always rains in August, don’t you know?
Bjorn Borg: “The English always act surprised
When it rains…” And yet some of us still go
To the seaside expecting to have nice
Weather! What gives? It’s time for you to wise
Up, mate. That’s what the Balearics are for
Or Cyprus, or Greece, where the sun still shines
Unlike Skegness, Torquay or Scarborough
If you’ve got money, Thailand’s not too far
Or Florida. Get a tan you can show
Off to the missus and kids, or tell lies
And just go to the salon; it’s not far
The browner you are, the farther you go
Like Jordan, a magnet for hungry eyes
Bjorn Borg: “The English always act surprised
When it rains…” And yet some of us still go
To the seaside expecting to have nice
Weather! What gives? It’s time for you to wise
Up, mate. That’s what the Balearics are for
Or Cyprus, or Greece, where the sun still shines
Unlike Skegness, Torquay or Scarborough
If you’ve got money, Thailand’s not too far
Or Florida. Get a tan you can show
Off to the missus and kids, or tell lies
And just go to the salon; it’s not far
The browner you are, the farther you go
Like Jordan, a magnet for hungry eyes
1436 - Aldershot shot by Watford
It’s ten to two in the morning; we’ve been
To Aldershot and back this afternoon
And evening, for a football game between
Aldershot and Watford. The Yellows soon
Beat the Reds, but this military town
Did not let itself down; they banged the drums
And chanted happily, though 3-0 down
Fathers enjoyed the evening with their sons
A few young lads brought along their girlfriends
We leaned on a barrier, out of the rain
There were no seats in this part of the ground
Luckily, by the time the end had come
The rain had stopped. Even Burger King seemed
Inviting, but no time to hang around
To Aldershot and back this afternoon
And evening, for a football game between
Aldershot and Watford. The Yellows soon
Beat the Reds, but this military town
Did not let itself down; they banged the drums
And chanted happily, though 3-0 down
Fathers enjoyed the evening with their sons
A few young lads brought along their girlfriends
We leaned on a barrier, out of the rain
There were no seats in this part of the ground
Luckily, by the time the end had come
The rain had stopped. Even Burger King seemed
Inviting, but no time to hang around
Monday 9 August 2010
1435 - Loss of love
I must admit it would be kind of nice
To feel once more and kiss the sweet soft skin
Of a woman, and to observe her face
As I liberate longings from within
Whether or not she’s prepared to begin
Unlocking my mysteries, on a voyage
Into the unknown pleasures of a man
That can’t compare to a bird in a cage
Or a dog on a lead. They’ll spend an age
Lavishing love on these, but it’s a vice
To love a man for nothing in return
Except love itself, it seems, so the stage
Is reached where it does not feel worth the price
And so till then I’m looking and dreaming
To feel once more and kiss the sweet soft skin
Of a woman, and to observe her face
As I liberate longings from within
Whether or not she’s prepared to begin
Unlocking my mysteries, on a voyage
Into the unknown pleasures of a man
That can’t compare to a bird in a cage
Or a dog on a lead. They’ll spend an age
Lavishing love on these, but it’s a vice
To love a man for nothing in return
Except love itself, it seems, so the stage
Is reached where it does not feel worth the price
And so till then I’m looking and dreaming
Sunday 8 August 2010
1434 - A sonnet a day
A sonnet a day keeps poets away
A sonnet a day is truly insane
A sonnet a day must be wrong, they say
A sonnet a day? How anal, how vain
Far better to be structure-free, the stain
Of plagiarising can’t be laid on them
That’s what they learned in poetry class when payin’
Over the odds, hoping to be the friend
Of someone who got published in the end
Cos they went to poetry classes; they
Learned well and reproduced shit from the brain
Of someone they idolised. So fashion
Comes and goes, and it changes every day
This isn’t fashion. How anal, how vain
A sonnet a day is truly insane
A sonnet a day must be wrong, they say
A sonnet a day? How anal, how vain
Far better to be structure-free, the stain
Of plagiarising can’t be laid on them
That’s what they learned in poetry class when payin’
Over the odds, hoping to be the friend
Of someone who got published in the end
Cos they went to poetry classes; they
Learned well and reproduced shit from the brain
Of someone they idolised. So fashion
Comes and goes, and it changes every day
This isn’t fashion. How anal, how vain
Saturday 7 August 2010
1433 - Village of the damned
We drove towards London, but Stevenage
Was where we stopped for their first ever game
In the Football League, an important page
In local history and local fame
I thought it would certainly be a shame
If on the way home we missed live TV
Coverage of Derby’s first game; the aim
Was therefore to find a pub we could see
The Rams play Leeds, and quite soon, luckily
We found a pub in Hitchin called The George
Which was showing it. The Rams weren’t the same
As usual; no, they won, so that is three
Points in the bag already, and revenge
For Brian Clough at the home of The Damned
The 'village' is Hitchin, and the damned refers to the book about Brian Clough (an ex-Derby County coach), who spent only 44 days as coach of Leeds united, who Derby beat today, as recreated in the recent book by David Peace - also a film - called 'The Damned United.'
Was where we stopped for their first ever game
In the Football League, an important page
In local history and local fame
I thought it would certainly be a shame
If on the way home we missed live TV
Coverage of Derby’s first game; the aim
Was therefore to find a pub we could see
The Rams play Leeds, and quite soon, luckily
We found a pub in Hitchin called The George
Which was showing it. The Rams weren’t the same
As usual; no, they won, so that is three
Points in the bag already, and revenge
For Brian Clough at the home of The Damned
The 'village' is Hitchin, and the damned refers to the book about Brian Clough (an ex-Derby County coach), who spent only 44 days as coach of Leeds united, who Derby beat today, as recreated in the recent book by David Peace - also a film - called 'The Damned United.'
Friday 6 August 2010
1432 - What is truth
Pontius Pilate once wondered what is truth
Well may he, but the answer is easy
Just like the soul’s a hole, like dreams of youth
Truth is evasive and illusory
What is, is, and is not; both equally
Is it a wave, is it a particle
Heisenberg only knew uncertainty
He’s like Socrates: the same principle
Philosophy agrees with science. Bull
And truth intertwine in straight lines of growth
In fields fertilised by technology
Weeds of selfish opinion that strangle
Crops of hopeful guesswork. To challenge both
Is to be burnt at stake or nailed up high
Well may he, but the answer is easy
Just like the soul’s a hole, like dreams of youth
Truth is evasive and illusory
What is, is, and is not; both equally
Is it a wave, is it a particle
Heisenberg only knew uncertainty
He’s like Socrates: the same principle
Philosophy agrees with science. Bull
And truth intertwine in straight lines of growth
In fields fertilised by technology
Weeds of selfish opinion that strangle
Crops of hopeful guesswork. To challenge both
Is to be burnt at stake or nailed up high
Thursday 5 August 2010
1431 - News nuggets
Read all about it, read all about it
Children die in fire in Edinburgh
Was the fire an accident? Was it lit?
Blood diamonds with love from Liberia
To Naomi, best wishes, Charles Taylor
Starlet Lily Allen pregnant again
We'd rather her a mother than singer
Interest rates stay at 0.5%
Holidays are still affordable, then
The Duke of York's Windsor Great Park home hit
By a bugler, sorry, by a burglar
These news stories are part of the top ten
Most popular on BBC's website
My work-based research was very thorough
Children die in fire in Edinburgh
Was the fire an accident? Was it lit?
Blood diamonds with love from Liberia
To Naomi, best wishes, Charles Taylor
Starlet Lily Allen pregnant again
We'd rather her a mother than singer
Interest rates stay at 0.5%
Holidays are still affordable, then
The Duke of York's Windsor Great Park home hit
By a bugler, sorry, by a burglar
These news stories are part of the top ten
Most popular on BBC's website
My work-based research was very thorough
Wednesday 4 August 2010
1430 - Floody hell
This year’s floods have begun in Pakistan
The Indus inundating dry valleys
Its unstoppable torrents overran
People like spiders in the bath. Cities
Liable to flooding include all these:
London, Glasgow, New York and Amsterdam
The Yellow and Yangtze flood the Chinese
Towns along their sides; the The Three Gorges Dam
Notwithstanding. Is the world warming? Some
Say ice is melting. Say, statistician -
Can we believe you, or is it all lies?
Meanwhile, BBC helicopters hum
Above the Indus. They come but are gone
Once the corpses have dried in the warm breeze
The Indus inundating dry valleys
Its unstoppable torrents overran
People like spiders in the bath. Cities
Liable to flooding include all these:
London, Glasgow, New York and Amsterdam
The Yellow and Yangtze flood the Chinese
Towns along their sides; the The Three Gorges Dam
Notwithstanding. Is the world warming? Some
Say ice is melting. Say, statistician -
Can we believe you, or is it all lies?
Meanwhile, BBC helicopters hum
Above the Indus. They come but are gone
Once the corpses have dried in the warm breeze
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