Friday 31 July 2015

3270 - A pizza the action

Hello, you little bastards. now I will
Summarise what happened this evening, try
Anyway. Assorted losers, a fill
Of people who have failed and yet still I
Have had a laugh with them. Pizza we try
To cook in the oven, tomato, cheese
The most basic boring pizza, sigh, sigh
But we're eating this basic stuff, oh please
But then again, my stomach will now squeeze
Some shit pizza in, try to get my fill
I forgot about food, hunger bye bye
But I shouldn't do that, no, I must seize
The day, and this shit pizza, if you will
Oh no, I said that, how stupid am I?!!

Thursday 30 July 2015

3269 - Just give me money

I got home and there's no sign of Javi
But his phone and his other stuff's still here
So no need right now to start to worry
His disappearance is nothing to fear
Cos it hasn't happened, but just a mere
Concern for him especially has been a
Complete lack of cash, because it appears
He didn't give his sort code to the ware-
house, so hasn't been paid! I hope he's there
Like I advised, collecting his money
Until then how can he go for a beer
I hope that he quickly becomes aware
Of what he needs to do to stay happy
And number one's getting his spends, that's clear

Wednesday 29 July 2015

3268 - Lots of strings attached

I'm getting hungry after my guitar
Session, which went quite well, again, and now
I play without looking, not like before
And strangely, it feels easier somehow
KJ and S & the B's were a wow
In my hands, all seems now so straightforward
And more practice to come, that will allow
Me to not just stand still but move forward
And then of stage performance, no coward
No comedy performers will compare
And if I keep it simple I should grow
In confidence and then become well 'ard
Anyway, before I become a bore
I'll quit this and start cooking, and so ciao!

Tuesday 28 July 2015

3267 - More poems about working and food

Still a bit knackered. Like to play guitar
In a while, not much else that I could do
But first, hang out my washing, and prepare
Some tea, I'm getting hungry, and so too
No doubt is Javi who is sitting there
On his phone. Heard him this morning, a few
Giveaway noises about half-past four
(In the morning), yes, he has that nightmare
Start to the day, shift starts at six, but you
And me would I think probably rather
Have a real nightmare in bed than have to
Get up that bloody early, it's not fair
Oh God, I'm really feeling this hunger
Better finish now. For reading, thank you!

Monday 27 July 2015

3266 - Rock this flat

Too tired to think of what to say after
Last night's late night, although I slept til nine
I still didn't get enough. But later
After work was done, guitar went just fine
Practising without looking's what I'm tryin'
And it's surprisingly easy, you know
To travel through a musical goldmine
While watching TV. Stopped wearing shades. No
Need, if I don't look, I don't need to show
The guitar in a dark light. I just stare
At the TV, or at the trees, and I'm
Hardly trying, it seems. Soon I will blow
Them away with my improvement, I'll scare
Them and myself with six-stringed moan and whine

3265 - Now is now

Good evening out with Dermot and Richard
Popped in to see Fat Roland and old Phil
Busby, Debbie's brother, and he was good
But that so hot back room at the Castle
Is a bit much, so we did a shuffle
To the bar and had a good chat therein
Discussing time and other concepts, the while
Knocking back good beer, but got a soaking
On the way home. Dermot he went shopping
For pizza, of which I had a slice, pard-
on me, Now I'm typing this, really should-
n't this late on what's now Monday morning
But it's good fun, live for now, it's not hard
Life is short, make it quite enjoyable

Sun 26 July

Sunday 26 July 2015

3264 - Hippy barthday

Always satisfying to hire a car
And get it back safely without a prang
Especially to Chorlton, that's a place where
I always lose my bearings, and feel anx-
iety, but I did it. Special thanks
To my mother, her birthday today, God
Knows how old she is, but no tanks
Could stop her in her tracks. We had
A nice meal at Ellie's. I should have had
Cod and chips, the chorizo was a far
Cry from filling, the lemon tart seeming
Far from big enough to fill my real bad
Appetite. Big up to Jo and Vee for
Being good company, we even sang!

Sat 25 July

Friday 24 July 2015

3263 - Johnny B. Deade

Friday night in, a little bit of beer
Just wondering whether to get more bottles
Before a prog at ten that's on Beeb Four
About the death of rock n roll, the skulls
Of rock n rollers laugh at the feeble
Bores of today, their strings pulled by the Man
OK so was Elvis, original
He was, devoted to the blues back then
A frontier pioneer, or just a man
From the backwoods, where formed a new culture
That spread round the world with shakes and rattles
It's all down to business, all determined
By money men, not art, art keeps you poor
But I stick with it, cos I'm not fickle

Thursday 23 July 2015

3262 - Shock defeat for the Grim Reaper

After work I went film-watching again
Been to three films at Home this month. Tonight
It was a film about Wilko Johnson
Not much about his music, but his fight
Against pancreatic cancer, giant
Tumour eventually being cut right out
In an operation, leaving him quite
Free of cancer, it seems. Saw him about
Three months ago at The Ritz - he was flout-
ing the idea of death, illness or pain
After tonight's film, they discussed the sight
We'd just seen, and Wilko's successful bout
With the Grim Reaper, Julien Temple sayin'
How much fun they had filming it. Good night!

Wednesday 22 July 2015

3261 - Days of wine and PIN numbers

So tired today, didn't stay up THAT late
But woke up 7:15, that's early
For me. At my office desk, felt eyes start
To close, rescued by speaking to Julie
She said she'd bring some chocolate wine for me
Tomorrow, that's something that will be new
I mentioned the chocolate beer casually
And she said 'I'll bring chocolate wine for you!'
I said, 'Just for me, or for the whole crew?'
Angela said maybe on her palate
She might place a few drops quite gingerly
Meanwhile helped Javier deal with phone folk who
Were asking tricky questions all about
His debit card - needs new PIN number, see?

3260 - Edinbeer

A fun day at work and after work when
I took Javier to the Worst Comedy Night
In Salford, hosted by Paul. Dave was in -
disposed, rehearsing for Edinburgh. Quite
A tall order then for him. I won't fight
Myself for the honour of playing up there
Competing with so many, it's a night-
mare, to be sure, up in Edinburgh
Comedian's graveyard, place to self-bury
Not a big audience but got share of grins
The so-called difficult audience no fright
If you've got material, like anywhere
And now to bed, not so late as it's been
In the past. Nice pint of beer chocolate

Tue 21 July

Monday 20 July 2015

3259 - Account Dracula

Up late last night with bank accounts all spread
Over my desk. Emailed Block Company
To ask accounts man why on earth he said
I owed two hundred quid, that's too many
I reckoned it was just half that money
No reply yet. Paid off my Post Office
Credit card, now just the one left to pay
That's my Tesco card, lone source of my debts
Apart from the mortgage... but come now, let's
Not dwell on that just now. Keep a cool head...
After work, wrote and practiced comedy
Will try to do more when I've written this
But first, a shave, trim eyebrows, get sorted
While there's still some light so I can see me

Sunday 19 July 2015

3258 - You're history

Mainly stayed in, done a few things not much
Exciting but useful enough. Hung out
With Javier after he got in, now must
Try to look at historic bank accounts
To check management company's claim 'bout
Me owing them two hundred. Sure that can't
Be right, though I might owe less, wasn't quite
On track with payments in '12. Had a jaunt
To Sainsburys, spent twenty-five, but still won't
Go bankrupt this month, hopefully won't touch
The overdraft line again. Missing out
On comedy rehearsal time - my fault
Cos when I had the chance, with guitar, just
Played along to stuff (but with eyes wide shut!)

3257 - Yesterday art gone

A day late writing this, was just too keen
When I got in last night to watch TV
There was a prog on Beeb 4 'bout the scene
In the 70s with David Bowie
Was out all day and most evening, busy
Hangin' out with my ex-wife, Vee, she's not
In the best shape, she's not all that healthy
But trying to improve her little lot
We had fun, a day out looking at art
The refurbished Whitworth Art Gallery
It's a nice size, bigger, but not obscene
Then afterwards we hung out at her flat
Had a few cans of Kronenbourg, that's been
The first drink since last Sunday - good for me!

About Sat 18 July


Friday 17 July 2015

3256 - Don't take my money

It's Friday night, and I am staying in
Had lots to do, done some of it, not all
Still need to look at bank accounts, see when
I didn't pay the rent (s'what I've been told)
Back in 2012 or thereabouts. Full
Of bull they appear to be, management
Company, saying I owe money, well
I'd rather not have to pay dodgy c***s
Who I don't trust, 200 quid, I've spent
On things we need in the flat. I'm saving
For a trip in September, in the 'fall'
Of underpayments, hope I'm innocent
I hope their calculations can be binned
But I must do a complete account trawl

Thursday 16 July 2015

3255 - Dumb defeat

My computer's half-asleep, it's real slow
I think it's struggling, and it feels quite hot
Perhaps it's near its final time to go
Anyway, it's still working, so let's put
Some words down quickly, before it's 'kaput'
Listening to Sparks radio show on Beeb 6
Talking of the BBC, it has got
Criticised a lot lately, the critics
Focusing on shows like 'The Voice' - but Strict-
ly (the very popular dancing show)
Though also dumb, is defended a lot
Because it makes money, exports and shit
I like that there's no ads, but there are no
Guarantees, its status looks nearly lost

Wednesday 15 July 2015

3254 - Good day at the office and flat

So this is the first full day Javi's here
And all is well, it's looking pretty good
We're even both quite interested in beer
And football is something that we both should
Be able to watch and enjoy, and food
Is not a problem either, simple tastes
On both sides, useful because we sure would
Struggle to fit it in the fridge where space
Is limited. So we have a good base
For moving forward gradually this year
The new bed's good, and for that price it should
Be! But that money's certainly no waste
Because it'll be there for the future
I could use it myself in times ahead!

Tuesday 14 July 2015

3253 - You better you bed

The exciting moment is drawing near
With the arrival of my first lodger
Within the hour. Had a moment of fear
When I made his bed and I discovered
I'd not bought sheets, so went straight out to the
Home store (I think it's Dunne's) to buy them (white)
Now hopefully he'll be happy on there
A nice new double bed and bedding, quite
Unused by anyone ever. A slight
Pang of jealousy from me with my dear
Creaky old second-hand bed, with cover
And sheets showing their age. But soon I might
Be able to upgrade flat and bed. We're
Enjoying the dawn of a new era

Monday 13 July 2015

3252 - I'll drink to that, maybe

Last week I drank on four occasions, not
The two I was aiming for, but that's a
Result of an invite, Saturday night
With Sunday as a follow-up, drank the
Remaining cans (and of course bought some more -
Six downed in all). Now back to twice a week
Should be easier from now on, when Javier
Has moved in. Company can make you seek
To be more on your best behaviour. Bleak
Loneliness is banished, and we can put
Down that beer can - unless they're a drinker
I kind of hope not, but the truth will leak
I can't rule that possibility out
Hope we can be friends and he stays a year

Sunday 12 July 2015

3251 - Pushing

I'm loving life, I'm in complete control
It may not always show, I'm a loner
I have a few friends and family, not all
Have that, especially those who live on the
Social media in substitution for
Real life, and who have little that they can
When push comes to shove, genuinely offer
Anything of value to other men
(And women.) You could argue with this plan
I like to have fun, I am not a troll
I like everyone happy, like to share
Happiness, and not deprive anyone
I was brought up that way, respect to all
Have a great life, even though it's not fair

3250 - Madchester United

Here we are, two thirty at night again
It seems so long now since I met Josie
And we went to Old Trafford once again
The foreign tourists in their numbers be
Takin' their selfies in front of Bobby
Denis and Georgie Best, finger pointing
I wonder how long this will last, now she
Is getting into music, referencing
Nineties Britpop and house, she's digging
The stuff I dabbled with when I was an
Oldie already, rave beats set to the
Old songs from the sixties, recycling
Mixing, nothing new, good stuff, yes, but then
As long as it sells, people are happy

Sat 11 July

Friday 10 July 2015

3249 - Don't weaken at the weekend

Quite easily dispensed with booze Friday
I mean I didn't get any tonight
Quite pleased with that, the saving anyway
But then I've been messaged and now I might
Nay, will be out for a drink, not a bite
On Saturday. Oh well, I can afford
It this time, thanks to Javier's deposit
Still largely unspent. Sunday, though, I would
Like to buy a table and chair he could
Sit at in that room. Bed arrives Monday
And he arrives Tuesday - early that night
I hope. And now I'm thirsty, so I should
And will knock back some milk very shortly
As soon as this last line I finally write...

Thursday 9 July 2015

3248 - Monkey puzzle

More energy today, that has been nice
A reasonably good appraisal meet
By recent standards, time will tell if tides
Have turned and unfairness is in retreat
I hope so, it would solve a lot of shit
I try my best and that's always been good
But some people, pen-pushers and fuckwits
Only see things in black and white, they could
Not see the wood for the trees, eyes of mud
Up to their necks in politics, office
Shenanigans, dishonest. Let them beat
Themselves up stabbing backs with smiling words
I'll always listen to my own advice
It's the best there is for myself to heed

Wednesday 8 July 2015

3247 - Tired but not fired

Bit tired today, think it's cos was awake
A lot in the night. Not many people
In this week, Andy the boss has bad back
And Helen's son bashed his head and is ill
While Julie was off today, Emma still
Came in even though she had a sore head
What a heroine! Angela meanwhile
Was in, but far-off, quite isolated
And Caroline was in, Steve too. To bed
Quite early tonight, for my own lil sake
Tomorrow's meeting is my appraisal
The first quarterly one, showing the lead
In how I'll be marked this year. Will they take
The piss again? They have done, as a rule

Tuesday 7 July 2015

3246 - Mucho dinero ahora

I've got a lodger, Javier from Spain
I'm excited, can practice my Spanish
And learn so much more, it won't be in vain
Collected the deposit, Cornbrook, whizzed
On tram to Bensons 4 Beds, bought a swish
Double bed, ten instalments of forty
Quid, with storage beneath. And now I wish
The bed arrives early morning Monday
Then I can go to work and all will be
Sorted nicely, and fun begins again
Replacing Louis' excellent laughs with
The company of a Spanish guy, he
Seems good-hearted, amigos that's the main
Thing (cosa), now this year should be good-ish!

Monday 6 July 2015

3245 - Rain rain, you won't go away

In between two viewings this second evening
Last night, the Polish girl, tonight, Javier
From Spain (with two mates). While here, heard the ring
Of my phone, someone else, she's called Eva
Is coming to view it in half an hour
It's very dark, rain-clouds grey and heavy
Not a great advert for British summer
And tomorrow night, for the comedy
The forecast's terrible, don't think I'll be
Taking my guitar, probably not doing
The song-based act I had planned, so I'll spare
Myself rehearsals of them, and maybe
Instead tonight I'll do some selecting
Of old jokes and write new ones to try there

Sunday 5 July 2015

3244 - Room with a view, and a boiler

I've finally advertised the flat. I took
Some good photos before the clouds appeared
And the skies opened. One girl came to look
As soon as the ad was placed. It looked good
She seemed keen, but saw the room, is afraid
Of boilers, and decided to say no
A Polish girl in leather, but she said
No.... Immediately she was keen to go
Oh well, this happens a lot, I don't know
Who'll say yes, hope they're not mad, and not fucked
Up in the head, and therefore not too weird
Tomorrow, a guy called Javier will show
Up at seven, no bed yet, but with luck
I can get one quickly from Old Trafford

Saturday 4 July 2015

3243 - Quays to the city

A warm day, went out in shorts and t-shirt
On the train to see Jo, had a coffee
At Tania's, her back's broken but not worse
Than it was before her brace (fits nicely)
Avoiding in Ramadan the city
Centre where possible, we caught the bus
Part way to Salford Quays, got off safely
Despite a madman on the bus, then passed
Some time in Costa, and sat on the grass
Then sat by Man U's stadium talkin' bout
Britpop and Madchester, that's what Josie
Likes now, the Gallaghers from Oasis
Blur and the Stone Roses, she knows their 'shit'
While it's all funny memories for me

Friday 3 July 2015

3242 - Poor young soul

Straight after work I went to Home, the new
Trendy cinema, the new Cornerhouse
In Tony Wilson Place (ha ha!), and you
Know it's near the 'Hacienda' flats that house
The spawn of the rich, beards and lower face
With hairy covering, and the men too
Why did I go to Tony Wilson Place?
To see the film 'bout Amy You-Know-Who
It was fun watching clips when she would do
Her fun teenage stuff, but it seemed although
She was a top singer from those young years
With good friends, she needed weed and booze too
Everything else was bound to happen to
Her, talent notwithstanding, poor lil mouse

Thursday 2 July 2015

3241 - Worry flurry

Now for today, what happened, not a lot
Back at work after one day off, and now
I'm feeling tired. I know that I should put
An advert up for the room, start to show
It off to potential renters, allow
Me to improve my lifestyle, get money
Although I admit I'm worried somehow
Who will it be, will we get on, will he
Or she be clean, well-behaved, trustworthy
However, I think probably I will not
Do that tonight. Energy-wise, I'm low
Might play guitar, Chevalier and Rossi
And then Serge G are next up, they are hot
Stuff to play along to (tu sais) you know

3240 - Yesterday's no more

Oops, I forgot to do this yesterday
No excuses either, I was at home
But as I played guitar like crazy
(Nico, Elvis, Beefheart), the aroma
Of a fag drifted up from the smoker
In the flat below, through my open door
Onto the balcony, felt the desire
And so popped out to the Sainsbury store
To get three bottles. That means can't have more
Now for the rest of the week, not Friday
Or the weekend, even. I can't have some
More booze til Monday. Twice per week's my law
Need to succeed with it, to save more pay
To put towards the holiday to come

about Wed 1 July