1791 - Carpet Man becomes Bear Man

Fun day yesterday, but Sunday today
Nevertheless I read the Istanbul
Guide book I took out from the library
Along with the Berlin book. What a fool
I felt as I read. It contained the rules
On haggling in Turkey I wish I'd known
When I was there a year ago and fell
Victim to the carpet 'bait and switch' men
Still, enjoyed reading about it again
Intiklal and Taksim, the memory
Still burns bright, and Orhan Pamuk as well
Walked to town for my dose of tattoo pain
The Berlin bear's now on my arm - he's a
Cutie, and I learned some Greek too - how cool!!!
Sun 31 July

1790 - The Ancient Mariners of Ashton

Spending a night in the Indian Ocean
Is not suitable for the faint-hearted
The rise and fall of your expectation
Of being served leaves you disappointed
We all turned up at the time appointed
The restaurant of that name made us seasick
Tossed aside, crossly discussed, debated
Were our options, rescue unrealistic
Dashed hopes, plate-smashing wishes, as fish-like
Waiters with bright teeth dished up for someone
Else, while stood on deck, now heavy-hearted
Dry-lipped, albatrosses around each neck
We waited for the end, for night to come
To be ancient mariners of Ashton fated
Sat 30 July

1789 - The times they were a changin'

The year 1789's the year
That's remembered for historic events
There certainly was something in the air
Back then in revolutionary France
The English had already tried these things
But felt they'd gone too far and then backtracked
The French upheavel, more like the Soviets
Sought a brave new world, old order hijacked
And ground to dust to the sound of heads cracked
Centuries of oppression breeding fear
Among the oppressors of violence
Calendars restarted, clocks once more ticked
Then blood-red dawns fade into light more clear
If greyer, where we once more start the dance
Fri 29 July

1788 - Travels in Salford and Liscard

I've tried to sort out emails and Facebook
At least is working, but I can't publish
On Blogger. Next, I must take a quick look
At Kodak Gallery, try to finish
The uploading of pictures. How I wish
It would all work! Today I walked along
The Irwell in Salford and saw the pix
Hanging in Salford's Gallery, liking
To get out in the sun but not spending!!
Last night by the way, had a bit of luck
Won the prize for the favourite poem which
Was chosen by Stella! Thanks dear! Singing
Was Jo Bywater, who played with great pluck
Like last time. Liscard rocked to some great licks!
Thur 28 July

1787 - Email travails

My email's not working at all right now
But never mind, no time to fix the thing
Tonight, no, because time doesn't allow
And also, this chair on which I'm sitting
Is approaching the end of its innings
And about to collapse through overuse
Not only can I not do uploading
Or emailing, for which there's no excuse
But any minute now I won't refuse
The laws of gravity and I'll crash low
On the floor, accompanied by bruising
It's hurting my back because it's not used
To sitting in a twisted shape just so
I stay on this broken chair while typing
Wed 27 July

1786 - Fuck-ups incorporated

Off work and at least I can now upload
Pictures from my phone to the computer
However, the computer can't upload
Anything or publish on the inter-
Net, yet. I think it's an email matter
Too many accounts, getting tangled up
Passwords, settings, using the wrong server
But I can't sort it, not today. Fucked up
Or what? So much for new phone, new laptop
Strolled down town in the sunshine to the post
Office, changed euros back to pounds, then the
Tattoo parlour. I arranged that I'd drop
In on Sunday for the bear that I could
Have inked in Berlin - no tattoo shops there
Tue 26 July

1785 - You are now leaving the German sector

Breakfasting at the Meininger Hotel
For the second morning spent in Berlin
No eggs today - quite why we couldn't tell
Got the Reichstag and Brandenburg Gate seen
We walked east down the Unter den Linden
Right onto Friedrichstrasse to Checkpoint
Charlie, sitting in deckchairs on some sand
Alexanderplatz didn't disappoint
The Rathaus, TV Tower, Neptune, a pint
Caught the S-Bahn train back to the hotel
Then Schonefeld Airport, flight to England
Lots of euros left to change into pounds
When I got back here, straightaway I felt
The weather warmer than where we had been
Mon 25 July

1784 - Heute, ich bin ein Berliner

I'm not as drunk, thank God, as yesterday
How I struggled to write that bloody verse
But tonight, in contrast, I'm still au fait
With what you'd call reality. I'm terse
Maybe, but that's the way it is. What's worse
Is when you're lying on your bed, dropping
Off to sleep with each line. I must confess
I've behaved better today. Recalling...
I went to Spandau, West Berlin, morning
On Sunday, quiet, with little delay
The U-Bahn took me back to the Palace
In Charlottenburg. Then I went walking
To Tiergarten and the River Spree
Then Kreuzberg... Lastly, drinks with the others
Sun 24 July

1783 - Long night's journey into day

Saturday morning bus to Liverpool
Blue skies way above John Lennon Airport
Before noon, easyJet made us look fools
But we boarded, acted like we were taught
We caught the S-3 to Spandau which brought
Us past Alexanderplatz on the train
Brought us to our hotel, which was a sort
Of railway station hotel, and a pain
Next morning I awoke holding this pen
And with this poem, unfinished, and full
Of beer and headache, hearing the report
Of a German woman who kept saying
Train times, though I was full, oh much too full
Of beer to care... This poem was hard-fought
Sat 23 July

1782 - On your Deutschmarks

Preparing for my trip to Germany
Flying from Liverpool in the morning
I remembered to get passport ready
Otherwise I'd really have been groaning
Grounded as I would certainly have been
Left behind as the other lads flew on
I've checked the weather over in Berlin
It looks like a mixture of rain and sun
So I've packed my brolly, good Englishman
That I am or maybe aspire to be
Will it get through security checking?
One thing's for sure - I won't pick up a tan
Also in Germany is the Grand Prix
But that's further west, at the Nurburgring
Fri 22 July

1781 - Top of the Hitler parade

I just did pretty well - after work I
Went for a drink with an old pal but on
The way home resisted the urge to buy
Fags and more beer, certainly not the done
Thing in the past, not the thing I'd have done
The past is past for now, but not for long
Cos in Berlin that good beer will flow down
Our necks as we natter in bars along
The strips in that once wall-divided strong-
Hold of east and west, city of the spy
The secret police, the Kurfurstendamm
JFK, several parks with flowers in bloom
Lakes, trams, trains, shops, burnt out churches, grey sky
All that's to come this weekend when we fly
To Berlin, so Germany, bring it on...

1780 - The meeting place

Today I caught the train to Newcastle
It was pretty wet and grey in the place
My company on the trip was John Hill
But I badly screwed up in the first place
Getting on the London train by mistake
And just switching in time - I nearly spilled
My coffee as I turned quickly to race
Off the wrong train and catch the right one while
There was time. As usual at Huddersfield
Lots of students and smart young workers filled
The train carriages till Leeds. Not much space...
Changed at York. Soon after, old Durham filled
The train window. On reaching Newcastle
We caught the Metro to our meeting place
Wed 20 July

1779 - A little touch of Jimi in the night

Two hours' sleep last night after poetry
And chat at the Sandbar in Manchester
My sofa was slept on by Tommy G
I drove there and back, being no drinker
Saw John Hall, Dermot, Steve, Zack and Anna
Tom G was playing my guitar real late
Worried about the noise at that late hour
I let him show me stuff and demonstrate
His techniques playing Jimi, which was great
Today worked my full hours, surprisingly
Tomorrow however I'll rise extra
Early and walk to the station to meet
John Hill on the train from Piccadilly
To Newcastle, and I'll see Ian there
Tue 19 July

1778 - Rainbeat

Relentless rain all Sunday and Monday
Easing off now we've reached mid-afternoon
My home email's still not working okay
May have the solution - will try it soon
As I get home - then off out down the town
To beat poetry night at the Sandbar
Do I have any new ones in that vein?
Not sure - will rummage through piles of paper
When I get home. I'm not even quite sure
Whether I'v a spot, or not. Alan Gray
Should be there, and Dermot G., and around
Twenty others, maybe. Tom George is there
He emailed and texted the other day
Now back to work before my tasks have grown

1777 - Madame Juliette

The year 1777
Was the year in which Juliette was born
As Madame Recamier known forever
Beautiful babe, star of any salon
Reclining on her sofa or chaise longue
Friend of Mme de Stael, both bravely fought
Against the dictates of Napoleon
Keeping alive an irreverence of thought
The portrait of the youthful Juliette
Captures her allure, preserves it even
For us, as I found when I came upon
You hung in the Musee Carnavalet
Where Proust's bed also lies, scene of fever
Of mind and body, self-recreation
Sun 17 July

1776 - Birth of a nation 2

In 1776 the States
Were no longer the British Colonies
Thomas Paine’s Common Sense had upped the stakes
And George the Third’s men were in a tight squeeze
He brought in the Hessians, Germany’s
Professional troops for hire, strengthen his hand
But the sheer number of Yanks weakened his
Efforts, and united across their land
The Declaration was thought of and planned
Read out on the Fourth of July to great
Approval - the Americans were pleased
Because of the Brits they were now ex-fans
The American Revolution paved
The way for the French one in a few years

1775 - Birth of a nation

In the year 1775
The American colonies rebelled
Paul Revere saddled up for that long ride
From Boston to Lexington where he told
Of advancing Brits, whose King George was cold
In his reception of the olive branch
The Yanks offered soon after - he recalled
Their rejection of British tea was staunch
And now they had taken up arms, a stance
Which would be kept immortally alive
In their constitution, despite those killed
At Bunker Hill and Concord, fights that launched
The Revolution, and a source of pride
In that self-reliance in which they're schooled

1774 - All you can eat, and then some

Today after work we went to a place
Called the Red Hot Buffet - it's on Deansgate
You go in, order drinks, and grab a plate
Then fill it with what appeals to your taste
The starters are a good place to start. Take
Your pick from bhajis, somozas or chips
Then on to prawns, sushi, pizza, pancakes
All dishes designed to conceal the hips
With excessive stomach expansion. Lips
Washed with water and wine, each dish replaced
With yet another. But it's getting late -
The two hours almost up. Time for a trip
To the dessert counter, I'll fill my face
With those and then with ice cream. This is great!

1773 - Ello Tosh, got a Toshiba

I've just driven out to Oldham to pick
Up the laptop I bought yesterday on
eBay, a Toshiba that looks quite slick
And will hopefully prove a real bargain
Roughly half-price, cos it's a returned one
Or an ex-display model, possibly
In a while I'll set it up, but at nine
Is a programme that's about Italy
The Camorra are from Naples, aren't they?
The town I spent a honeymoon in back
In December '03 - It's quite a town
Anyway, I'll delay the new IT
Till I've watched that hopefully nostalgic
Programme - then it's Toshiba time. Come on!

1772 - Rack off, we're hacked off

This week there's been one story on the news
The Murdoch newspapers and phone hacking
Rupert and James Murdoch are being accused
Rebekah Brooks seems immune to sacking
She acted on orders, has their backing
They all claim something quite incredible
About that phone hacking they knew nothing
Paying the police for info's illegal
Yet Brooks and Coulson were captured on film
Admitting this at a committee years
Ago. Blair's friends then, and since becoming
Cameron's, they all felt untouchable
Like MPs and bankers. Conspiracies
Seem trickier now, hard to stop them leaking...
Tue 12 July

1771 - I've a little teapot

From Mum I got a Fawlty Towers teapot
It looks good but basically it's useless
It may as well be made out of chocolate
Because it won't take hot liquid, or else
It'll crack. Back home last night, a few smiles
While watching 'In The Loop' - seen it before
But I'd forgotten! Probably had a glass
Of beer that night, I guess, or three or four
Each night nowadays I tot up my score
On the wall calendar of days I've not
Bought booze, and I am having some success
Not buying beer and fags means I've got more
Of everything else - time, health, cash, the lot
Yet these last few days I've felt so listless
Mon 11 July

1770 - Hoylake ahoy!

Stayed at Mum's, then from Greasby to Hoylake
For a day's poetry, and hobnobbing
File full of poems I'd chosen to take
Currently not in the mood for talking
But still it's nice, the meeting and greeting
Co-readers wandered off, I wandered down
To the prom where artists were displaying
Their works on the seafront railing. Around
The corner were picked up various sounds
Country and western or a bagpipe's croak
The prom was where most people were milling
Locals on their Sunday strolls - what they found
Surprised them but they took the chance to look
At art and the artists all there, selling
Sun 10 July

1769 - Full English

When faced with life's ups and its many downs
We all end up doing the best we can
Though on others' faces and on our own
Are many frowns, as things don't go to plan
We jump out of the fire into the pan
Like we're Mexican jumping sausages
We roll around and get all burnt again
By Fry-day we're well done and need a rest
The week's events can be hard to digest
But it's the same in all cities and towns
We all end up doing the best we can
Though some bests are poor, and others are best
There's equal credit should be passed around
Since everybody does the best they can
Sat 9 July

1768 - Back later

Self-belief becomes triumph of the will
As long as you retain it, come what may
Right now I'm down, I'm having terrible
Trouble with my phone - can't make it obey
Can't send emails or read them, so they stay
In limbo, so in communication
Terms, I'm incommunicado, so they
Might think I'm rude. I'm out of commission
That's all. There are limits on what my phone
Will do at present. My computer's ill
Or dead. I'm Robinson Crusoe, astray
On a desert island, lost and alone
I feel gagged, bound and useless, but I shall
Be free again - I will, somehow, someday
Fri 8 July

1767 - Brain death and Bolton

Woke up at eight and did some ironing
Then went to work - a long and tiring day
Principally because of a long meeting
In which I had to concentrate and say
Pertinent comments - couldn't drift away
My brain was hurting... Then I walked on home
Had a snack, then caught the train Bolton way
Where I watched some acts and read a poem
It was quite long, some concentrations roamed
I was a little drunk maybe, reading
In truth I was a touch too tired to play
A song... Then caught the train back from Bolton
Now here I am, desperately writing
This sonnet - then bed. Tomorrow's Friday...
Thur 7 July

1766 - Phone groan

Getting my phone sorted out, Day Umpteen
Last night, read through the 60 page manual
Learned a bit more about my phone machine
But by evening's end, I had had my fill
More research at work, websites to consult
Which I can't do at home - laptop is dead
Soon after getting home I made the call
To Three and O2, to get things sorted
To my relief I've now got Internet
But can't do emails yet, despite trying
Will persevere with that, along with all
The apps that are on there, and the widgets
Now relaxation time, time for cooking
And TV watching - I feel I've done well!!!
Wed 6 July

1765 - Phone alone

My old phone's now inactive as a phone
It's still got photos that I want to keep
I'll try to upload hem onto someone
Else's computer later on this week
I've printed out a few pages at work
Of my new phone's user manual and
I'll look at it tonight and try to make
Progress in making calls, receive and send
Transferring contact names and that will then
Be enough. I've started to learn German
Be in Berlin in two and a half weeks
'Hannah and her Sisters' (Woody Allen)
Arrived by post - hope that film will be fun
Last night watched 'Frida' before going to sleep
Tue 5 July

1764 - Give me a sporting chance

A hot sunny sports day at Josie's school
She didn't win anything but had fun
As usual most parents were acting cool
Despite the heat - I feel sorry for them
And the high pressure ride that they're all on
In their expensive houses in Wilmslow
Meanwhile my five year old laptop's broken
It boots up but only leaves a window
To get things done of a minute or so
I've saved files to hard drive;from now I will
Have to rely on my new mobile phone
For internet access, and also go
On it at work, posting when possible
Maybe I won't need broadband or landline?
Mon 4 July

1763 - In the Pool

A hot sunny day with Pearl and Josie
And the plan was to go to Liverpool
But thought it wise not to tell Jo's mummy
As she gets worried. Saw the cathedrals
Then parked at Mount Pleasant.St George's Hall
Was next, then to the shops, especially
To Liverpool One. On to the Big Wheel
Then drove to Southport, parking by the sea
Though of course it was way out. Shells are free
So she picked several but shan't sell any
Next, drove to Churchtown's big Botanical
Gardens, then late home. Missed the final day
At Wimbledon. Watching highlights to see
Who won. Ah, so Djokovic beat Nadal
Sun 3 July

1762 - Wimblephone

I seem to have spent all day sorting out
The new mobile phone I got on Thursday
Took so long, couldn't even concentrate
On the Wimbledon ladies' final day
Was pleased the Czech girl Kvitova won - they
Usually grunt and squeal when they hit the ball
It gets on the nerves, seems like unfair play
But Petra doesn't do that, and so all
Agree she's a great winner. Liverpool
Tomorrow, with Pearl and Jo, on a boat
Across the Mersey, maybe. Energy
Is low now, need to drink and above all
Need to eat. I've been waiting hours to eat
But my new phone's working (an HTC)

1761 - Unlucky strike

Yesterday, sat at home and watched the news
Our strike was covered, specially in London
They marched from Kingsway, down the Strand, up to
Trafalgar Square, and then down Whitehall in
The direction of the House of Commons
In studio debates, the BBC
Showed more allegiance to the government
Than public sector workers. Dimbleby
On Question Time seemed rattled, uneasy
At mass audience support for them. The news-
Papers also did their worst. I saw on
The Daily Mail front page the word bully
Aimed at the unions, and giving the view
That they shouldn't stop us all going in